Negativity from strangers

So, boyfriend and I stop into the mall tonight. He decides to go to the eyeglass store to check out some frames he saw in the window. Right next door is a GNC, so I run in and see about getting some samples of protein shakes to try.

When I walk into the store this middle-aged woman asks me if I need help. I tell her I am looking for protein shakes and she promptly gives me a strange look. I expected it. What fat girl goes into GNC looking for protein. Anyway, I tell her that I'm going to be having WLS and then she's ready to help me. She gets me some samples of chocolate and vanilla and some other thing. While she's ringing me out some muscle-head is sitting in the massage chair while they process a return for him.

"What do you have there?" he asks.
I politely answer, "Protein shakes." and clearly look like I don't want to explain.

The lady that was waiting on me feels that it is her duty to announce that I am having WLS.

*disclaimer* I am not ashamed that I am having this surgery at all. I'm actually very proud and excited to be making this extrordinary change in my life. It's just not GNC lady's place to tell random strangers my business.

Seems that this "dude" is a personal trainer and starts telling me how he can make me drop 30lbs in 2 months and how he's talked people out of the surgery. And then how his GF has it before he met her and she regrets it. BLAH, BLAH, BLAH. I've did the trainer thing for 2 years. It's not a matter of training anymore. I having this surgery because of a medical condition that TRAINING can't fix. He just wouldn't lay off.

GNC lady did finally come to my rescue and tell him that he doesn't know my medical history and then he stopped.

I grabbed my bag and met BF outside of the store. He could tell I was clearly upset. He shared a piece, just a piece, of his Auntie Ann's pretzel with me and he hugged me while I vented to him. He's a good guy. :)

This is the first pushback that I've received from anyone regarding this surgery. I've had people "awe, you don't need that, you look fine" but that doesn't bother me. I'm really not doing this for looks, although it will be a nice perk! It's entirely for health reasons and so I can have a family someday.

I just didn't think some stranger talking crap on my decision would effect me as much as it did. Oh well, some people...

My number one rule is: **** what anyone else thinks. Seriously. Aside from my family 4 people know about my RNY. Whenever I go into a store (especially GNC) I politely tell any associate that I will let them know if I need any assistance. It keeps them out of my face, and allows me to browse the merchandise at my own pace.

You know I completely understand where you are coming from. I too dont feel embarrassed or hide it from people but I feel it is my decision to tell who I want to tell abuot my surgery. I mean what should I do walk around with a sign saying I had Gastric Bypass. I tell those that I am comfortable telling and then there are those that I dont tell because it makes no sense. Why should I tell my coworkers when I started working here about 10 months after I had my surgery and I had already lost most of my weight. Its not that I am hiding it but I dont think that I need to announce it to everyone I see. Also it ****** me off when others talk about it behind my back. If they ask me up front I will tell them I would not deny it. Furthermore I have a story about this: I went to visit a friend of my boyfriend's the other day and as soon as I walked in and said hi his wife looked at me and asked me how I was doing. Now mind you this was recent so its been well over a year that I had surgery. I asked what do you mean because at first I did nto know. She replied how do you feel after having surgery. I was shocked because I never told her and my boyfriend knows not to tell his friend due to the fact that Ive made it clear to him that if anyone should tell it should be me. So she continues to tell me that she found out because this lady who works at her job told her and said have you seen AMANDA she is so thin but you know why she had surgery no one can get that thin that quick an on their own. This lady happens to be the mother of my niece's mother. i never told her anything myself. I know who told her but you know that doesnt matter what matters is why the hell is she going around telling random people my bussiness. If she had questions then she should ask me. If others talk about me it gives her no right to bring up my personal bussiness. But you know what I am not even stressing it anymore. I only brought it up to prove my point that people should mind their own bussiness and it is your choice not anyone elses what to do with your body and who you choose to tell about it.
 

lol...people who have NEVER been fat always seem to know how to cure the fatties around them.
never fails...it's always so much better for you to do it their way...and they never waste an opportunity to point it out..."you took the easy way out"

Just get used to smiling and walking away...lol...you can't make someone who has never cried after stepping onto a scale ever understand...they're a completely different creature!

success speaks for itself, so don't let it get you down!
xxxbecca

What an ass.  He looked at you and saw money.  If he got you as a client he would have made a boatload of cash off you.  I think training can work for now but for some people it is just temporary.  I would have asked him for his card so you could use his services after surgery, to help you get toned.  Then I would have thrown it away as I left the store.

Ya know what?! I think you're exactly right. All he was trying to do was sell me on his "awesome training". He just saw $$.  Too bad he doesn't know that I'm generally broke. lol ;) Joke's on him.

What a tool!

Thank you for letting me see that. 

People suck sometimes.....Especially people like the guy you describe.  You should have high-fived him in the face.  

I'm sure his gf probably regrets her surgery because he put her down so much for just not "training" the weight off.   I'm sure he's a great support system.  

Honestly, the best thing  I think to say in situations like that is "I'm sorry, I just don't feel comfortable talking about my personal matters with people I don't know."  Be very firm and unless they are complete idiots, they will shut up.  

Bummer that happened to you, hopefully you'll find more supportive people along the way!

~Emily~

Thanks for all the messages everyone and thanks for letting me vent! 
This site is such a great support system.

you don´t have to give any explanations tooo noooo body. is your body. In my experience is better to aboid the subjet `cuz a lot of people is ignorant about WLS. so you don´t say anything.
I only told my family and friends about surgery `cuz i did not want people telling me to not have the surgery and scaring my out.!! and now when people ask me i say the truth. I exercise a lot and i watch what I eat.  I know you are very proud of your decisio of having WLS. but be verycareful you can get hurt.
BUT BE HAPPY THIS IS THE BEST THING YOU ARE GONNA DO 4 YOUR SELF.
PS. all those people who dare to say bad things about wls. is because they don´t know how is to deal with a desiesse.  and they are ignorants so don´t listen to people who don´t know what they are talking about listen to people that really cares about you.

HUGSSS.