OT um... how to deal with paranoia guy issues
for those of you that read my last blog/post sorry for the recap
long story short I was dating this guy and falling pretty hard for him... I lost my virginity to him then 36 hours later he broke up with me because he wasnt over his ex, he thought he was but having sex made him realize that he wasnt... but he wanted to be friends and he was sending confusing texts telling me that I am awesome and beautiful and that he wanted to hug me and cuddle me and blah blah blah and so I was really confused.
Fast forward one week to when we had made plans to hang out, he was sick and so we didnt hang out on Sunday as per the original plan. Monday we were texting and he said he was on campus so I told him that i had something for him. I took him a bowl of soup and a powerade and told him that would help him feel better since he had been sick the day before... Keep in mind that at this point we are still just friends cos he had broken my heart a week earlier. So he thanked me and hugged me and I melted but I said you're welcome that's what friends are for and left for lunch with some friends. So while at lunch I decided with the help of friends to tell him that I can't be just friends. So I tell him this and he sent me texts sayin "ur kisses, hugs, touch and making love to you meant something to me amber. ur not just any old girl to me. the way i feel with you is different. I don't know how to explain how u make me feel amber. and when you brought me that soup this morning, and i saw you... I knew I was still falling for you, and that I am over her (his ex) - I think ur a great girl and truly think that ur beautiful and I want you, i want to be with you." So we got back together and this week has been good. Monday we went to the mall and then to dinner and a movie and Tuesday I met his family and he asked to meet mine on Sunday and I slept over at his house Tuesday(I know I am so bad)... and Wed we woke up and went to school together and had lunch and thursday we went to a concert and now I havent heard from him since... and so I am paranoid. I guess because he broke up with me once and i am scared to lose him again... but i have texted him with no response and i dont know what to do... I dont want to seem clingy and I dont want to be pushy and push him away but I am scared that Sunday isn't going to happen or that he is gonna dump me again ... y am i like this? wtf? should I say something or suffer to myself...
long story short I was dating this guy and falling pretty hard for him... I lost my virginity to him then 36 hours later he broke up with me because he wasnt over his ex, he thought he was but having sex made him realize that he wasnt... but he wanted to be friends and he was sending confusing texts telling me that I am awesome and beautiful and that he wanted to hug me and cuddle me and blah blah blah and so I was really confused.
Fast forward one week to when we had made plans to hang out, he was sick and so we didnt hang out on Sunday as per the original plan. Monday we were texting and he said he was on campus so I told him that i had something for him. I took him a bowl of soup and a powerade and told him that would help him feel better since he had been sick the day before... Keep in mind that at this point we are still just friends cos he had broken my heart a week earlier. So he thanked me and hugged me and I melted but I said you're welcome that's what friends are for and left for lunch with some friends. So while at lunch I decided with the help of friends to tell him that I can't be just friends. So I tell him this and he sent me texts sayin "ur kisses, hugs, touch and making love to you meant something to me amber. ur not just any old girl to me. the way i feel with you is different. I don't know how to explain how u make me feel amber. and when you brought me that soup this morning, and i saw you... I knew I was still falling for you, and that I am over her (his ex) - I think ur a great girl and truly think that ur beautiful and I want you, i want to be with you." So we got back together and this week has been good. Monday we went to the mall and then to dinner and a movie and Tuesday I met his family and he asked to meet mine on Sunday and I slept over at his house Tuesday(I know I am so bad)... and Wed we woke up and went to school together and had lunch and thursday we went to a concert and now I havent heard from him since... and so I am paranoid. I guess because he broke up with me once and i am scared to lose him again... but i have texted him with no response and i dont know what to do... I dont want to seem clingy and I dont want to be pushy and push him away but I am scared that Sunday isn't going to happen or that he is gonna dump me again ... y am i like this? wtf? should I say something or suffer to myself...
<3 with Love ~Amber~
"To be irreplaceable, you must be different" - Coco Chanel
"To be irreplaceable, you must be different" - Coco Chanel
Hey,
I say that maybe he is just as confused as you are, it hurts when the one we want decides hey I have feeling for someone else, then only a week later, I like u I wanna be with you, like what you told her you weren't over her and she was like step off I'm done, and hes treating you like 2nd best??
Then again, u have been spending alot of time together, we all need space, its a new relationship u dont have to see each other everyday. If you have feelings like hey hes gonna leave again, it may not work out, see how Sunday goes, if it happens, then you have someone you can work with, if he gives u some crappy excuse, and dosnt, then u should let him go, we all deserve happiness, and getting let down dosnt make anyone feel happy!
I hope this helps
Good Luck, lemme know how it goes!!
Jeannie
I say that maybe he is just as confused as you are, it hurts when the one we want decides hey I have feeling for someone else, then only a week later, I like u I wanna be with you, like what you told her you weren't over her and she was like step off I'm done, and hes treating you like 2nd best??
Then again, u have been spending alot of time together, we all need space, its a new relationship u dont have to see each other everyday. If you have feelings like hey hes gonna leave again, it may not work out, see how Sunday goes, if it happens, then you have someone you can work with, if he gives u some crappy excuse, and dosnt, then u should let him go, we all deserve happiness, and getting let down dosnt make anyone feel happy!
I hope this helps
Good Luck, lemme know how it goes!!
Jeannie
first, I'm not the type to sugar coat things so I'm sorry in advance if this comes off as a little harsh, but it really sounds to me like you are getting played for a fool, and what is worse, you are allowing it to happen...it is completely unnatural to remain "just friends" with someone who you have had an intimate relationship with, ESPECIALLY if you were not the one doing the dumping, basically you never wanted out and it seems that this guy just realized you are readily available to him and his needs.
I'd say RUN and run fast cause once the games start, they will always BE. He already knows that he can dump u one day and sweet talk to the very next.
I'd say RUN and run fast cause once the games start, they will always BE. He already knows that he can dump u one day and sweet talk to the very next.
SW-236/GW 125- pre pregnancy weight-133 / current weight- 123!!
Defeated PCOS with the help of my RNY & despite being told I couldnt have kids, i am a proud mommy to Bella Rosa =)
Defeated PCOS with the help of my RNY & despite being told I couldnt have kids, i am a proud mommy to Bella Rosa =)
Relationships are so hard and confusing. I see a therapist and she pointed out something that gave me one of those "Ahh now I see" moments. Some of us women and even men who are overweight suffer with self esteem, self confidence, and especially self worthiness issues. We accept anything someone gives us because we feel so little respect for ourselves that we think we really dont deserve much.
When I posted my relationship question I was surprised by a lot of responses but the most valuable response was people pointing out the importance of this surgery and making life changes not just the food part and health part but just my choices period. I'm learning to speak up when I don't like something and not just speak up but stick by my choices. I may not always be right but its how I genuinely feel. It's so important for you to decide if this is a pattern youre okay with. If youre okay with a guy turning his feelings off and on...and if youre okay with a guy dissapearing for a few days then thats your choice but if youre not and you feel like you deserve more then vocalize that to him. Let him know thats is disrespectful and then move on if he won't change his ways.
He's obviously taking care of himself and doing what makes him happy so you should to! I hope I helped
When I posted my relationship question I was surprised by a lot of responses but the most valuable response was people pointing out the importance of this surgery and making life changes not just the food part and health part but just my choices period. I'm learning to speak up when I don't like something and not just speak up but stick by my choices. I may not always be right but its how I genuinely feel. It's so important for you to decide if this is a pattern youre okay with. If youre okay with a guy turning his feelings off and on...and if youre okay with a guy dissapearing for a few days then thats your choice but if youre not and you feel like you deserve more then vocalize that to him. Let him know thats is disrespectful and then move on if he won't change his ways.
He's obviously taking care of himself and doing what makes him happy so you should to! I hope I helped
Tennille :)
Start: 303/Surgery:295/Today:213/Goal:153
Start: 303/Surgery:295/Today:213/Goal:153
I dont want to sound harsh either but you dont need a therapist...just listen to Blancas reply. She is right. Hes immature and happy to disrespect you because you dont respect yourself by letting him jerk you around like that. You have to know that there is BETTER and much more mature out there. If you dont demand to be treated better than that you will never get anything better. And by demand, I mean, you break up with him and stop talking to him...then you will have all the time in the world for someone better when they show up :) Let him have his ex if thats what he wants! I know its hard...but you will be happier, believe me... Ive really been through it!
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