stuck in between a rock and a hard place.....with saggy skin!

Omg....I am like so upset right now....my wife can be such a friggin ****! Ok so look....she know I want gastric bypass surgery and she's known that for a min now....so she's says that I should do whatever makes me happy...but she doesn't approve...she says I could do it on my own without surgery she did it...but she's never weighed over 170...and plays soccer..and is an ex marine...so yeah....she's letting the possabillity of death and complitions fog her judgement...I understand those facts...I've accpected that....but in the long run..if I don't have it im already digging my grave...I currently weight 380lbs...im 5ft. 7 in...and only 25 years young and have been overweight all my life....I don't have any health problems but shortness of breath...and a ****** up self image...my mom died at 49 years old from like a million and one health problems...one of them being obese...450 something....so that's my main consern....but I can't tell her cause she gets anger everytime I talk to her about it....like this time...saggy skin is "my" main consern....it really not that big of a deal to me...but I don't want her to get grossed out my my naked body....I would eventually have surgery to correct the problem...but...again I talked to her and she said she doesn't know how shell feel...and it probley would gross her out...but she wouldn't leave me over it and stuff...but to know I would be unatractive in her eyes hurts my heart...so I guess my qusetion would be...is it that bad...skin wise....over all everything....is it worth it....do you really have that much skin....I don't know...please help!

Krystal

I would do it all again with or without the skin.  I was fortunate to have a Tummy Tuck to remove my huge panni last June.. but with the amount of mobility and agility I have without the extra 180 pounds, I'd do it again in a heart beat.  The Plastics are just icing on the cake.

You have to be realistic, at your height and weight, there may be alot of extra skin... do all you can to tone and keep it in shape- water, vitamins, exercise.

Good Luck! (And have a good long talk with your wife... Communication is so important)

Wow....like jaci said COMMUNICATION is such a huge thing.My b/f was not to sure about surgery too, but after the consult (came with me) and group consult he felt alot better about surgery. Its definitely hard to get past the fact that there is a possibity something may go wrong whether it be big or small. This comes with any kind of surgery.

I basically told him I need to do this for me and me alone, if I dont I will surely kill myself in the long run from medical problems and bad eating habits.

Stick with your gun, Im sure she will be happy about it. It just may take a while!!

Keep your head up you are doign the right thing to live longer!
Kel

When I talked to my husband about what he thought about the whole surgery, he mentioned the extra "flappy" skin as a concern of his.  I just explained, hey, I have flappy skin right now too, its just LARGE and flappy instead of just plain ol flappy.  Plus when I explained the other positives that came along with it all to counteract the flappy sagginess, like him being able to pick me up, me being able to sit on his lap, and then the other more sexual type stuff that comes along with all the non-heaviness, he realized that seeing me naked and saggy wouldn't be all that bad ;)

He was of course also concerned about the side affects and possible complications, but when I then explained the side effects and complications of doing nothing about it, he also realized that WLS really was the best choice for me.
He's not much of a talker, so to get all this opinion type stuff outta him I had to sit him down and say, ok, we need to talk about this because I need to know what you think before I go into this so you know what's coming and I don't get any last minute complaints about the process!