"The Limits of Thin..."

I am the second-hand recipent of my grandma's Good Housekeeping subscription.  She sends them my way when she's done with them so I can cut them up and make them into my own form of collage-art, but sometimes before I cut them into useful-to-me pieces I read them.  And this piece by Geneen Roth (who has also written pieces about emotional eating and concious eating that have resounded with me in the past) hit me right between the eyes.

I encourage you to check it out.  Pre-op or post-op this has something to say to all of us.

www.goodhousekeeping.com/health/emotional/limits-of-thin

And when you're done reading, come back and tell me what you thought.  We can have a good old-fashioned discussion.

The author talks a lot about "it" things...."If I only got/achieved "IT" I would be happy"...IMO there are a lot of factors that contribute to us being unhappy or unfulfilled, by strongly believe that in our American culture the number one reason by far is something that has been termed "Affluenza:"

Af-flu-en-za n. 1. The bloated, sluggish and unfulfilled feeling that results from efforts to keep up with the Joneses. 2. An epidemic of stress, overwork, waste and indebtedness caused by dogged pursuit of the American Dream. 3. An unsustainable addiction to economic growth.

This pursuit of affluence that we seemed to be programmed to strive has HUGE psychological ramifications for most of us, and it often leads to physical ramifications as well.

If you've ever read Henry David Thoreau's classic Walden, you can begin to paint a picture of the benefits of a conscious effort to make an escape from affluenza.

There is a lot more on this topic, including a PBS series and a book, just google it and explore, I think it may help you change your perspective on things a little bit and help you identify what is really important in your life and maybe help you find some form of actual happiness in the now....Now if I can only get my whole family to buy into this idea...

After being sick for so long this past year, I got it.  I have all I need to be fulfilled right this moment (most of the time, because other times there are these really cute jeans for $50 at TJ Maxx...).

What most got me about this piece was the always waiting to be happy, as if when that last pound falls off something magical is going to happen to make the world a better place for people.  

PS I like Thoreau's Walden, though I prefer Emerson's Nature
 
"Standing on the bare ground, my head bathed by the blithe air, and uplifted into infinite space, all mean egotism vanishes. I become a transparent eyeball-I am nothing; I see all; the currents of the Universal Being circulate through me-I am part or particle of God.The name of the nearest friend sounds then foreign and accidental: to be brothers, to be acquaintances-master or servant, is then a trifle, and a disturbance. I am a lover of uncontained and immortal beauty. In the wilderness, I have something more connate and dear than in the streets or villages. In the tranquil landscape, and especially in the distant line of the horizon, man beholds somewhat as beautiful as his own nature." 

No one can be cooler than the guy who came up with the "transparent eyeball" image. 
 

That is a pretty awesome article! I am now to the place and I am not sure if I am the only one but I am pretty comfortable where I am weight wise and size wise...i rarely step on the scale and eat pretty much what I want. The only thing is that I am starting to feel out of "control" Is anyone else dealing with that? How do you get the "control" back...I am dating a great guy (going on 4 months) and he loves me just the way I am he encourages me about eating right and working out (not demands it in any way) he just is proud of me for how far I have come and doesn't want me to throw away all my hard work...reading this article has helped alot...Thanks Amy!!

I'm with you about "comfortable where I am weight wise and size wise", and there is nothing wrong with that.  It is a wonderful feeling - ya know, one less thing to worry about. 

I guess I'm wondering what you mean by "out of control" too.  Does it have to do with all the change? Because I completely understand that it takes time to adjust to everything that is different now, and it will happen as you live through more days in your new size.  Is it something else?  I want to help, I just need more info.  

What do you mean by "out of control?" Do you mean out of control because you aren't yet comfortable with your new body? Lifestyle Changes? Do you feel exposed? Like, "how do I handle not being fat me, just me?" Or do you feel like you're eating is out of control? Please elaborate

I guess by that I mean that when i first had surgery it was so "by the book" eat at this time, this many ounces, do not eat this, only eat that...it was so precise and I had control over that...now that I am this far out I feel like "i can eat whatever, whenever" and still feel good about it I guess that structure is gone...I have been very sucessful and I am extremely proud of myself...just hate that I re-introduced some things back in (like bad carbs and sugar (chocolate)) and now I cannot for the life of me get rid of them. There are so many areas I am extremely good with, don't drink anything bu****er (hate the taste of anything else) don't do caffeine...just wish I hadn't let the other things slip...I guess that  is what I mean...Does that help?

Ah, so you're in the "so I had WLS and lost a lot of weight, now what the heck am I supposed to do with my life?" phase. 

You are in control.  You just don't have to revolve your life around protien, water, vitamins and so on.  It is okay to not stress 24/7 about making sure you're doing everything by the book - it is also okay not to follow "the book" 100% of the time.  Now don't go forgetting all your good habits and  sabotaging yourself  - but from what you describe it sounds like you are doing well.  Monitor your weight, but you don't need to obsess to be in control.

You're doing just fine.  

Thanks Amy! I have been hearing so many stories of people gaining back all their weight it is really stressing me out...I don't want to be a failure ya know? I know that runs through everyone's mind I am sure...

What a great article Amy. I can relate to what the author has written. Before I had WLS I told myself I would be extremely happy if I weighed in my 100's again, to able to walk around comfortably, go into a trendy store and buy what ever I wanted, be able to cross my legs, be able to run, be able to tie my shoe laces without having to bend in an awkeward position, to be able to fit into a chair without having my fat touch the sides. I can go on with the list but I think you catch my drift...

I am a year and a half post-op and can do all the above that I have mentioned. Honeslty, by having the WLS I have over exceeded all my expectations.. Then I decided that I would be more happy if all my access skin was removed and if I enlarged my breasts.  I did that 2 months ago. I am still not satisified in my own skin and want to lose 10 more pounds. To be honest with you I do not know if I will ever be "satisified".

I am trying to figure out who I am. I can say that I have changed after WLS. There are more opprotunities that have come my way by being thinner. People being more accepting, my career that I have been working towards, men. In the back of my mind I always ask myself would it be this way if I was at my heaviest weight. I know I should not think like that but I do and I can not help it.

From this article I am going to take 2 things and run with it. I am going to start living in the moment because I am passing up my own happiness. Secondly, I want to learn to be comfortable in my own skin because I am beautiful.


~Diana~