Is This Really The Best Choice?

  I'm 20 years old. I am 5'11 and weigh 334 lbs. I have been overweight/obese for a vast majority of my life. I thought to post on here because a part of me is scared. I'm 20 years old. I still want to have fun and go out when I turn 21 this year. I want to have a child later down the road. These are things that are running through my mind. I'm scared that I'll be trading in one problem for a whole slew of others. I don't have any health issues yet with the exception of a very achy body. To all of the other 20 somethings out there, how have you dealt with this? Do you still lead normal lives?

Hey! I was 22 when i had surgery, 23 now. It's been almost 14 months and i have had no problems whatsoever. I live a completely normal life. I've lost 125 pounds and and no one can tell unless i tell them and they are completely surprised. I eat whatever i want without any sickness which is a gift and a curse. I know i can have the occasional treat, have cake on my wedding day and things like that, but i also have to watch myself more because i don't have any problems. I also can eat pretty much like a normal person, i mean in the sense that i don't eat like 4 bites of food and get full, i did in the beginning, but as time goes on you can eat more and more. Anyways i guess what i'm trying to say is this surgery made me more normal, i shop where i want, i don't feel bad in airplanes for the person sitting next to me. My boyfriend can pick me up, i'm not ashamed of how i look and i am completely happy. If i could do it over i wouldn't change a thing, except, maybe never get fat to begin with! : ) Starting weight :292 Current: 168 Tummy Tuck on August 14th 08 and i want to lose 20 more pounds before then!

Hi there. I had surgery last September.  I was 20 and turned 21 4 months later.  I had half of a ****tail on my birthday, and a whole ****tail a couple weeks later when my friend took me out to dinner.  I found that I honestly didn't even really like drinking anymore after I turned 21.  I thought it would be such a huge milestone and now I just don't even give a damn.  I'm not a huge fan of the way alcohol tastes, nor the way I feel afterwards (really sleepy/woozy). Lots of people have kids after WLS.  Check out the pregnancy board to see all of them. I live a pretty normal life, I'd say.  I can't eat a lot, and I eat very slowly, but I still go out to eat with people that don't know I've had surgery without drawing a ton of attention to myself.  I've had a couple comments about the small portions I eat, but for the most part, people don't say anything.  I feel more normal now than I ever did when I was 368 pounds. You do need to be aware of the risks and be absolutely certain that you know exactly what the post op lifestyle entails.  I mean REALLY think about whether you can do what is required in terms of protein and vitamins/minerals.  To be completely upfront, I take at least 20 pills per day.  It's actually more like 30, but some of those are non-essentials that I take anyways and your requirements are likely to be different.  I take pills 4 times per day, everyday.  I have a pill organizer bigger than my 80 year old grandmother's.  I think about food, water, and vitamins for a very large chunk of the day.  It's a big commitment, and a lifelong one at that. I was a very carefree individual when it came to food before surgery.  I ate whatever, whenever.  I could barely take a prescription once per day when it was required.  I was a total flake.  I am now much more structured, because I have to be.  I feel a little bit more nailed down than most people my age, but I wouldn't change it for the world.  I love that my knees no longer ache all the time, I love that I am not constantly sweating, I love that I feel comfortable in my body, I love being able to look in the mirror and truly like what I see.  These things are worth it for me.  You just have to figure out if they are worth it for you :)

I'm only 19 and i am getting my surgery on Thursday. Your fears are so normal. i am having the exact same ones. But the way i see it, i am doing this for a reason, and i want that change in my life, so i may not be able to have a huge party when i turn 21 and go to the bars. i have decided thats it's  okay. me loosing the weight and becoming healthy is way more important. its up to you to decided if you think that this will help you in a way that you can deal with. If you think you are ready, know that we are all here for you. this board is really helpful and super supportive. and from what i can see everyone on here that have had the surgery are leading more than normal ones. they are doing things they never thought they could. like running marathons and such. good luck with everything. i hope this helps at least a little.

Thanks for the replies! I feel like I go back and forth about this every hour on the hour. I'll wait to see if I'm approved first and than take it from there. I think a good meeting with my surgeon will do me wonders.

Do I still lead a normal life? Well, whats normal? lol. You still want to go out and have fun when you turn 21 - I assume you mean drinking and partying - you have to decide whats most important to you in life - losing weight, getting healthy and keeping it off.... or drinking and partying? While many people drink post-op you still have to decide if its 'worth it' there are issues of transfer addiction and the empty calories that make up the alcohol. Most surgeons have guidelines as to how long to wait to drink.... depending on the surgery you have its really 'not fair' to your body to add the additional stress of alcohol until you are further out IMO. I personally dont have any health issues, but they do happen to people.... its still something I think about and keep up with on the boards to see at what stages do people develop different issues. However, for me the benefits of the surgery outweighed the possibly consequences. As for being normal - this is my 'normal'... definately not normal for the next person I have to be 110% dilligent about my vits/supps, I have to keep up with my bloodwork, I have to read labels and constantly think about food choices, I have to track my nutrition to ensure I am eating enough, I have to keep up with the exercise, I had to work on my personal issues and still am working on them today... the surgery is only 10% what the surgeon does and 90% what you do... so it is a lot of work. I am comming up on 2 years out so this is much easier to me... its just part of each and every day. Its not all work/bad of course... there is so much more I can do now that I never could before... I can now run (almost!) an entire 5k... I can shop where I want, I feel like the outside finally matches the inside... I can fit in all seats/chairs, I dont have to worry about sweating so much or turning red because I was always hot... there are a million things I could go on about.

It was the best choice for me and a lot of others here.  It may not be the right thing for you, but I strongly encourage you to look into it because it sounds like at your weight you are a good candidate and frankly there are better rates of success in keeping weight like that off long term with surgery than with just dieting (if you are even able to get the weight off by dieting/exercise alone).   My all time high weight was something over 300 pounds (I'm 5' 3") but I'm not totally sure exactly what weight because it got to a point that I couldn't use my scale anymore because it didn't go up that high.  My weight on surgery morning was 293 and now I fluctuate between 130-135 pounds.  I also was diabetic and hardly able to make it up 2 flights of stairs before my surgery and now I don't have those problems anymore.   I was 19 when I had my bypass, am 22 now.  For my 21st birthday It was more important to me that I could keep up with my friends, feel good about myself and not die dancing than it was to get a drink (though I did have a mojito, and occasionally I have other alcoholic drinks and one is all it takes).  I have a heck of a lot more fun now a days even though I can't pig out or drink anyone under the table, because I can move and feel good in my skin.   If you decide on surgery  you could have problems, so it is good that you already know that and can take it into consideration when you decide.  I had a complication from hell that lasted for months and months and put me in the hospital for something like 3-4 weeks all together and required 3 sugeries to fix - but I am like one of 6 people nation-wide who have ever had this complication so I'm a freak.  AND I would hop on the operating table for my surgery again without a moment's hesistation even knowing this would happen because my life is THAT much better now. My life is very "normal" now.  I eat well, sit on whatever piece of furniture I darn well please (this is a big deal to me - I don't know if it is just me - but every now and then I plop down on a frail looking chair just because I can without worrying about if it'll hold me), I can walk all day long and keep up with all of my friends and family, and I am healthy.  Is my life different that pre-op?  Heck yes.  I can't eat mindlessly and stuff myself - but my body never deserved to be treated that way to begin with so it's better this way. I plan on having a child or two myself, and I know other post-ops who have had happy and healthy pregnancies eventually giving birth to happy, healthy babies.  So surgery doesn't mean no babies, it just may mean taking a little extra care and doing a little extra monitoring with your doc - no biggie. I am biased, obviously, as most of us are going to be because for the most parts our lives are much better since our surgeries.  I made the right choice for myself, and I think surgery can help other people too.  So I hope this helps you see that surgery doesn't mean a freakish life ever after - but it also doesn't mean a 100% cure-all, magic fix.  Just read some profiles and you'll see that.  I wish you wisdom in making the choice for yourself, and I hope that whatever you choose to do that you find success. 

im still waiting for my surgery... but i found myself where you are right now....  i really think that a couple of stiches... hurt so much less than all the stuff we fat people have to put up with... a change of life??? yes... isnt that what we want???? instead of driving while our friends make out in the back...??? not being the funny chubby guy... ???? i dont know... i think being fat is not normal.. and besides just having the surgery give you about 13 more years in your life!!!!!! so there.. i said it... baldo...

it's scary, isnt it.  all i know is this....think long and hard before you make the decision....and when you do, do your best to be completely sure you are okay with that. i am 10 months post op and finding that i didnt really fully accept what i've done.  it makes it difficult for me to enjoy the things that others (who've had the weight loss) enjoy.   its very mentally challenging.  prepare yourself as much as you can