Totally off topic...break up, ouch.

I broke up with my boyfriend yesterday. We had been dating for almost three months. The problem is I still care about him very much. I only ended it because he was so insecure and had major issues trusting me (based on a past relationship). I can't stop worrying about him. I'm afraid I made a snap judgment and should have given him more time to trust me. I just couldn't stand the idea of being called a liar or a cheat again, even when I hadn't done anything wrong. Why am I in so much pain when I'm the one that broke up with him? Shouldn't I feel fine, if I made the right decision? I can't stand the idea that I hurt someone I care about. He doesn't know anyone here, besides me and my friends...he can't go home for the holidays. I was the one he was supposed to be with during those times. I feel like scum. I just wish I knew that he would be ok. Will this get better? I guess I'm just looking for reassurance or advice. You don't need to flame me, I already feel bad enough.

Your gut feeling is usually right. If you feel deep down that what you did was wrong, then you probably are. No one says relationships are easy. Love is a dangerous thing, and it can hurt someone easily. If you had only been dating for a couple of months, there's still so much to learn about each other. If he has trust issues because of a past relationship, then he's not going to get over it until he experiences otherwise.... which he was probably subconsciously looking to you for. If you know your not a cheater, then that's what matters. If letting him be suspicious and jealous for a while is going to help him get over it... I say let him. He'll eventually get over it when he finally comes to the realization that women can be trusted, I know from personal experience. It's hard to go through it, I know... but if you truly love him, it will pay off. If you don't truly love him, then it's probably not worth the effort. If you didn't feel from the beginning that this was something special and was going to last, then it probably wasn't meant to be. Your gut feelings really are tell-tale. Listen to your heart. If you feel like what you did was wrong, you can always go back. Breaking up is the hard part. If you feel like you were in the right in your decision, then you probably are. The pain will get duller as time goes on, and eventually you'll get over it. Let us know what happens. ~Katie

You've only been dating for 3 months and he is already being jealous? Girl, you're not supposed to be out of the honeymoon period yet. If things are already bad, move on. It's hard, and maybe with some time apart and some maturing things may work out for you two later but right now you don't have enough invested in the relationship to fight tooth and nail. Don't get any deeper right now than you already are. Be strong, you both will survive and move on. You're not a bad person. You are doing what's best for both of you. ((((LB))))))