new with a question!!!

Hey!!! Im new to this board! I am 22 and in the pre-op stages of having RNY!!!! Im so excited!!! I, like many, have been struggling with telling certain people in my life. I have only chosen to tell a few people, but I have had some really strong opposition. (and great support, which is awesome) Anyway, the small opposistion I have has really offended me. I have had a couple of friends, who know me very well, have the nerve to ask me, "well, do you even know that that surgery is dangerous?" or "they wouldnt approve u anyway, you are too young." I mean, like I would even consider something that I have not done EXTENSIVE research on. I even preface telling people with the fact that this is something I have been considering for a long time, and done and continue to do LOTS of reseach on everything involved, including the possible risks. So, my question is, how to do react to this? I know my friends love me and care about me and are reacting out of shock and ingnorance, but I want to be able to quickly reassure them and let them know that what I do with my body is not up for debate!!! I have had a couple of people even say, "well--have you tried drinking more water?" just ignorance on obesity...I know I got myself to where I am, but since when is using medical intervention a bad thing!? sorry, this post has turned into a vent..but from you folks, I would love advice on responses that have worked for you! Especially since u are in your 20s too, people just dont get that we would consider surgery... thanks!

Sorry they have bothered you so much, just remember that you live once and not for anyone else. Right after surgery (2 days) I had a friend come up to me and say "i cant believe you did that" very snotty. I said nicely to her "well I researched my surgeon and chose very carefully and feel very confident with my decision, and you dont know what its like to be 23 weigh 378lbs, a BMI of 57.9 have bad joints, back, high blood pressure, acid reflux, and recent infertility, you my dear have always been skinny, c-ya later,and take care of those babies" and i left. I am happy with my choice, and i dont care if no one else is, its your life hun, if you want it grab it and take it. Bigger people make everyone else feel secure and better about themselves, Good luck on your journey!

I am 23 and in the pre-op stages too... I have decided to not say anything to my family or friends until after I get it done... Of course my parents know, and some friends that are super close, but other than that. I feel no need to tell them.. I feel that all I am going to get are people telling me not to do it, and asking why, etc. I dont feel like explaining myself a million times to different people. It is a decision I have made for myself, and no one else. Good luck with everything!!

bah, down with the haters! hopefully you can look past their ignorance and see the caring concern they've got for you. unlike you, they haven't done all the research and from just what you hear in the news, gastric bypass doesn't sound like a really good option. the news likes to cover all the "problem" cases because it's sensationalized and attracts viewers/readers. so appreciate their love but keep the details of what you're doing to yourself and tell only those you trust enough to share your research and your decision process. i found myself being more open the further out from surgery i was because then people can't argue with my obvious success.