OT-HELP!!! I can't do this by myself anymore!
Ok, so I need to let off a little steam. I;m 24, and have custody of my 15 yr old sister. She is gonna put me in the poorhouse!!! She made our regularly 80 dollar phone bill 590$!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And, I am not a rich girl....I also have to keep buying food, since she eats everything in sight that is microwavable (she REFUSES to cook!) and her clothes and stuff, which are not purchased all the time, are horrificaly expensive (shes native american and has size 12 mens feet!!!) and I only make 22k a year! Im so stressed out, 3000 in debt, and while i know thats not a lot, i feel like im falling so far down...i dont know what to do....can you guys PLEASE give me some suggestions on how to cut spending down? Keep in mind that I live in Seattle, and life here is spendy....If there are any accountants in the house??? HELP!
It would probably inconvenience you, but you might consider cutting long distance out of your phone all together and telling her if she wants a phone she can pay for her own prepaid cell phone. Alternately, do you have the 'cable phone' service up there yet? Down here (Southern Cali) it's advertised at about $40 per month, no long distance charges.
I'd say also to quit buying things that can be popped in the microwave. Again, inconvenient for you, but if you can't talk sense into the girl, do what you can to control the problem.
For clothes, I can only tell you what my mom did; she was a single mom with 3 girls and my dad didn't pay child support, and her job wasn't paying her because they didn't have any money. She gave us each $60 and dropped us off at Marshall's or Ross. That was our school clothes for the year. I'm the oldest, so when I was 15 I got a job, and if I wanted extra clothes, they came out of MY paycheck.
At 24 (which I am), I can't imagine taking care of one of my sisters. If I had to, I imagine that some pretty rough cir****tance would have been around it, in which case I would just sit her down and say "look, I don't make enough money to take care of 2 people, but I have to do it, so you need to help me make things work." and then just lay down the rules. At 15, she should be able to understand it. If she wont listen, you gotta just do everything in your power to take away the things that cost you money. Tell her that if she wants extra things, she has to get a job and pay for them herself.
I have some debt myself, and it really just feels like it weighs a million pounds on your shoulders.
All of my advice is an outsiders perspective, none of it 'from experience' (except for mom's clothing rule), but maybe it'll help. Also, if you ever just wanna chat, I have AIM (MysticTaeza) and yahoo (seh_sarah).
Sarah
Hey Misty,
I would sit down and make a budget for the month. Show your sister the budget and explain that if she doesnt help you stick to it yall will be out on the street. $590 is CRAZY for a phone bill. I have Verizon and I pay $60 a month for unlimited long distance. She does not have to go shopping all the time! She will get along just fine with some basics for the summer. At 15 she is old enough to get working papers for a part time job. If she wants more expensive clothes she should make some of her own money. As for food, I would go to sams club or costco and do most of your shopping for the month. Get healthy foods that you can eat to. She will have to learn to fix food for herself that isnt all microwave! I know it must be tough on you but you need to put your foot down to keep both yourself and your sister out of a bad situation. Best of luck hun!
With love,
Em
Maybe try giving your sister and "allowance" weekly (for chores or whatnot) so she can learn to budget her own money. Can she get a p/t job on the weekends? (grocery store) Or maybe she can start pet sitting/baby sitting.
As for cutting spending - Do you need a home phone? I have a cell phone and thats my only phone... cutting the home phone saved me $60 a month.
Cable - it *is* a luxury... I didnt have cable for quite some time, eventually you dont miss it and find other things to fill the time.
Food - maybe sit down with her and set a budget and together come up with a weekly list of food that is going to be bought. I cant say I blame her for not wanting to cook but that doesnt mean you should have to spend either.
Look at other expenses as well... write down what is being spent each day... things like Starbucks, Drycleaning, going to the movies etc all adds up. If you look at one month you would be *amazed* at how much is spent on "luxuries".
Hope this helps!
Thanks girls!
I sat down with her last night, and we discussed the money situation. She is going to look for babysitting jobs for this summer and fall (she is semi-homeschooled, so it's ok) and start to learn her own budget. We only have cell phones, and she is going to pay for some upgrades to the plan out of the Social Security money she rec's each month. I shop at Winco (which is like a small version of Costco) and I don't have a lot of luxuries (like cable, internet and rent...) becasue I live in a Mother in Law apartment, and those come with the rent. We lost our little hamster, Moka, last night, and so we sat down and talked about expectations. She is going to learn to make simple meals of ouf this cookbook we have, and I followed the advice of the board and just told it to her how it needed to be said. We created a budget for us that will work for our lifestyle and hopefully that will help us out!! Wish me luck!!
Misty
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