Guidelines for Newbies

I'm just 3 weeks out and cruise the grads board because I feel that experience goes a long way to knowing what works and what doesn't. I think it is awesome that people like you are so willing to continue to post information to help people like me. You could easily just lose your weight and then be on your way, but you and so many others on here obviously really want to "pay it forward." I just wanted to say thank you and know that I will continue to watch what you all have to say. Maybe every bit of info won't apply to each person, but, with a little discernment, I can't imagine getting through this without my more advanced sisters and brothers to guide me along a little. You grads are the best.

Theresa, congratulations on being 3 weeks out! I guess while we all seem to have some differing opinions, I would probably recommend this book to you. It's got some basic recommendations and if you practice these Success Habits during your first year, you will help ensure a good outcome for this major surgery you just had. Can you lose all your weight while still grazing or drinking soda?? Maybe, but I still believe your chances are certainly better if you avoid these things. As a grad, I appreciated the reminders from the book. By the way, there's a part of the book that specifically addresses "paying it forward" and without thinking about that, this is what I've been doing. I visit post-ops in my local hospital and stay in touch with some newbies online and via email and through our support groups because I just want to be a resource and a help. I'm glad to hear my post and this board helps you! Congratulations again as you start this exciting new year!! Jan

Jan, all of these are well, good and necessary. What is unstated is the need for the discipline and mental toughness necessary to succeed on the post-op side of life. All too often, once difficulties present themselves, people fold up like a cheap suit. The emotional needs they were addressing with food are still present. Surgery did not remove them at all. Those who confront challenges with whining, waffling, or panicking will continue to do the same: whine, waffle or panic. Only those who confront their disordered lives, eating and otherwise, will find that for which they are looking. They will adapt to the new realities regardless of the discomfort of the unknown. They will adopt behaviors conducive to success. When tough times come (and they surely will), they initially may flinch, but then brace themselves and press forward again. Those who pine away for the good old days will be rewarded with a return to them, except those days were not really all that good. (Here I am reminded of the Hebrew people following Moses, wandering the desert, willing to return to slavery in order to get the food to which they were accustomed. Bottom Line: If you want to get to the promised land, you can't look back, you can't stop and give up; you have to keep moving forward.) So to supplement protein or not to supplement may be important, tums vs calcium citrate might be important, but unless you are prepared to rearrange your way of thinking, don't bother having your GI tract remodeled. I am all about tips and techniques to help along the way, but they can only get you so far. Success is far more dependant upon what occurs above the neck than below. Obesity is visibly manifest from neck down for the most part. However, its origins are largely from the neck up. Nowhere Man/PH/Jay

Jay--Great post and really true. I truly believe that much more than 50% is from the neck up. I really didn't understand that before surgery- but it is really clear now. On a seperate note--I have sometimes read posts from people who say that they regret the surgery and would rather trade their new bodies for the ability to eat food. It truly is absolutely amazing.

Jay, this book only addressed behavior and habits on a very basic level. Like you pointed out, so much of WHY we eat also needs to be addressed after surgery, or we will find a way to outeat the surgery or will simply find some other destructive habit to replace food since we can't use that anymore. My personal resolution this next year is to explore the WHYs of food for me. I certainly agree with your post! Thanks so much! Jan

The discovery and subsequent quenching of the WHYs is the greatest hurdle we face. As long as those deeply seated issues remain latent, we continue to be at risk. I wish you success as you make the perilous journey within. Nowhere Man/PH/Jay

...and so it goes...the mutual admiration society lives on. Oh yeah, you said nothing 'bout little old me. There I go, so clearly modified from the neck up that I insert myself into the lives and posts of others. What I meant to say is Amen, which should only be said by those who did not say the thing to be praised in the first place. ...slowly the indulgence of the past few days fades and reality rears its sensible head...tomorrow I am certain to disagree and/or at the very least be confused by the linguist that is Jay. Fat in the head today, Karen