What Do You Think??

I will sign ((((huggs))))

I just don't really understand why people get so crazy, after all there is no law saying we have to go the the Main board. If it annoys people so bad they should just stay away. The new kids are just that NEW. and the info is very extremely mixed (as I posted below) I enjoy posting to the new kids because I remember how it feels to be new and that a kind word goes a long long way when You are feeling physically miserable, not sure why you went thru this, when now you feel crappy, no visible signs of weigh loss and probaly dealing with a lot of mean and or stupid remarks from your so called loved one / friends/ co workers It seems kind of useles waste of time and fairly sadistic to flame newbies because they don't know what I do and they really just need kindly support.

You are assuming there is a consensus or one right way. I think on the grads list you will find many differnces. I mean just protein - I haven't used shakes since 2 months except after plastics when I was not in the mood to eat and they helped me **gain** back when I lost too much when I had an illeus, and after it resolved was not up to eating. I hear people talking about gaining and they don't know how when they are drinking X number of shakes a day and others tell them up your protein to X+ number of shekes and I bite my key board not to yell _ hey cut the damn shakes, they have big calories and you should be getting in food that will satiate you instead. BUT there are others whose 5 shakes and an occasional meal make them feel great and they are maintianing very very well. there are also those promoting shakes who have a financial stake in doing so. So I keep it to myself. I need 56 grams a day of protein a day (1 gram per kilo per day bases on ideal body weight) and I know from my biology, anatomy and physiology and nutrition classes excess protein is indeed stored at fat. Otheres were told or decided on their own that they need 150 + grams a day and they only count that from shakes , not food. Exercise - I exercise almost every day 1-2 hours strenuosly. I cut back and gained 5 pounds, got off my a$$ and got to work. I do cardio 3-5 times a week, weight training 2-3 days a week and yoga 2-3 days a week. (cardiovascular health, strenth, flexibility are all important components of physical fitness, for me it is not just about the weight, but the health) others never exercise and do great. still others don't exercise and fight regain constantly or lose the battle. I HAVE to eat 6 meals a day to feel good, and not binge on crap. others docs told them strictly 3 meals & absolutely no snacks. I was told diet pop was fine after 6 months. ( need I say ziplock bag test, I know I burp and a ziplock bag does not) I rarely indulge because most of them taste about like what I would imagine horse pee would taste. Others were told never ever. same thing with straws. I have used them since early on because for whatever weird psychological reason I can drink more fluids during the day if I use a straw. I was not ever told to avoid popcorn. I do on an occasional basis, and when I go to the movie, I have it with a diet lemonade and have them TOGETHER! Others were told it would explode their pouch. Some eat less than 20 grams of carbs a day, (god knows how they do that because I can't figure it out) and some count ALL the carbs(me for example and it is usually 120 - 150 grams a day) others have fallen in to the net carb marketing ploy. and still others don't count the carbs in fruits and vegetables, but do count other sources. I think sugar alcohols were invented by satan and avoid them. others freely indulge in sugar free candies. often while struggling to understand why they ar not losing or are regaining or hitting a plateau. I drink milk and use 3 dairy products a day. I saw some one else liken a glass of milk to eating a 3 musketeers. seriously now. I think it is sweet that you want to help, but ya know we all are told different things and there is little actual evidence based practice and a lot of " repeated until it becomes true* & *everybody know* practice I think the varying things we see on the main board are a reflection of the lack of evidence based practice and docs jumping on the money train to get rich off the pain of the obese while not really caring if we get a long trm solution once they get their $$$$$$

I appreciate your thoughtful post! You are right, of course!! I think my heart got going too fast for my head to catch up and there really are a lot of gray areas post-op. Jan

I think you have the nicest intentions in wanting to make a positive contribution to help others in a meaningful way

Said very well!!!

I can't count the times that I've spent time thoughtfully composing a reply on the MB, and then just as I was about to post it thought, "Oh, what's the use anyhow" and just canceled it. -L

I probably should not be posting here as I am only 4 months out but I have to say that I LOVE reading all the posts from the more experienced people. I don't post much but I read the main board, my surgery date board, the Florida board and this board. I just wanted you all to know that many of us....or at least me...hehe...really appreciate the knowledge that can only come from experience. Oh, and the idea of creating this "list" was lovely, too bad people on the MB would possibly have ruined it with ignorant responses...many of us would have love the tips and would not tear you apart for offering them.

I agree with you Diane, and I as well should not be posting here....yet I know the main board sometimes is a mess but we have to try to find the heart of the issues. And well its not always what a person wants to hear, as they say truth hurts. I don't think I've ever read a post by anyone, grad or newbie, that has upset me, baffled me sometimes yes, but each person is traveling thier own journey and the experiences are different, similar but different for all of us. I don't post much because I feel some of my issues aren't part of the "norm", my weight gain, my surgery and my food life after surgery don't seem to mesh with the consenus. But i do post support and suggestions where and when I can - thats all anyone can do. No one has the magically answer, sometimes the answer is there but not being heard - its the old saying You can lead a horse to water but you can't make them drink. ~~Melissa~~ 297/188/140

Just to join the newbies that shouldn't be posting here yet...... I just wanted to share with you what I get out of reading the posts of grads on the MB. I am probably what is classified as a lurker. I post very occasionally. I find that someone has often posted already what I would have contributed. I think the experience many grads have in response to their posts is the same as the "customer service problem". If one works as a customer service rep 99% of the time someone is calling to complain. All the satisfied customers don't get on the phone to tell the company how great they are. So while these unhappy callers are a very small percentage (or so a company hopes) of their total customers, they are almost 100% of who the rep interacts with. Now the MB isn't that extreme. Many people make the effort to recgonize the time, effort and kindness that goes into someone posting a response. But I think this phenomenon is contributing to the folks experiencing "posting fatigue". As a newbie lurker, what I get out of your posts to the MB is your diversity of opinion. What has worked for you and what hasn't worked for you. Then I apply your experiences to my situation and try to see what is relevant for me and what my doctor advised. I also enjoy learning what is common information among people who have had WLS and where have people had differing recommendations from their doctors. So there is a silent group out there (probably even the majority) you might not hear from that really get out a lot out of your contributions. Which may be too little compensation when you are getting flamed or dismissed. One other thing, maybe that sometimes it takes time for people to really digest information they have heard or didn't want to hear. What this media doesn't allow us to see is the the Ah-moment that someone has a week later when they hear the advice of a poster in their ear that prevents them from engaging in a bad behavior. You are probably having a great impact on a large number of people. You just can't feel it with the transactional nature of the message board. I hope you will continue to provide advice and guidance as your patience and time allows. Thanks! Kathy 301/239/135