Back into bad habits

Help, 20 months post op and fallen into bad habits. Unfortunately I do not get sick on anything, never have. So now I have to rely on sheer willpower. My problem is when I am being really good and don't lose any of the 10lbs I have gained the past 6 months I get frustrated and eat something bad. How do I stay on track??? Will I ever get those 10lbs off???

191/2 months out I go up and down too. Especially after the Dr. told me to gain weight. I believe you will loose the 10lbs. I also believe it is only you that can make it happen. The surgery was/is only a tool, and you are the master, especially if from the beginning nothing really made you sick. Sometimes I think my tool is broke! When I try to jump start a little weight lose I go on Atkins and NO CARBS or 0-2 CARBS a day that generally helps. My doctor also says just because I think I need to loose 10 lbs., my body might think I am right where I need to be and is being very resistant to more weight lose. I don't know if I helped or rambled. Stacey 326/132

You need to learn how to "eat something bad". I had a doctor explain to me that feeling deprived sometimes causes binging on the thing you feel deprived of. He further stated that a single cookie, or a thin slice of pie, will cure your craving for the sweets. The same goes with any other "bad" choice. Learn how to "have your cake and eat it too". You have to recognize the beast for what it is! I have been trying to get rid of the last 15 lbs forever and ever. Eventually, in its time, it will go if it is meant to. Now just stop beating on yourself and take a power walk instead! Good luck and God bless!

Also, I see that you are here in Buffalo. If you would like information about the local support group, feel free to contact me off list.

I was feeling like I was getting out of control again, so I went to see a therapist -- someone who specializes in weight and WLS. The first thing he did was ask if I was gaining weight. I said no. Then he started me keeping a diary of my food. When I went back he looked at it and said it doesn't look bad to me. He then started guestimating calories on my "worst" day. Turns out I wasn't taking in a lot of calories -- just eating more than I had for the past 2 years and it seemed out of control to me. All those old negative self-image feelings were coming back which didn't allow me to see the true picture. So now I diary the food -- and calories -- and I try not to view any food as bad as long as it fits in my daily allowance of calories and it's not a "regular" food. Deb

Below is a reply that I wrote to another similar post. Hope it is helpful to you. This is what works for me...and BTW, what works for me may not work for the next person. But it is always helpful to share and know that you don't have to freak out because you have free will to make choices and you are evolved enough to foster your self awareness and take responsibility for both challenges and successes. I am almost in the third month of my 5th year post op. I am hardly the model WLS post op, but I have found what works for me. And by the way what works for me may not work for the next person. But here goes...I had the good fortune of freaking out about 6 weeks post op when I was standing in the grocery store faced with all sorts of foods and realized that the only thing different about me was that I had a surgically altered smaller stomach. I was still the same person with the same food issues, the same habits and the same thoughts and feelings...how the hell was I supposed to do this and be successful? It was in the store, with tears running down my face that I had an epiphany, I had to replace my old negative behaviors (closet eating, eating mindlessly, not planning, lack of total awareness) with new and positive behaviors. I had to replace the old negative "tapes" of worthlessness, too fat to change, etc. with new and positive messages that I could tell myself and believe and live. It was then that I started studying behavior modification which is really just about changing behaviors. Sounds simple...it ain't. But I'll make it easy for you and I will share some of my top learned new behaviors...try them out if you are interested. 1. Failing to Plan is Planning to Fail. Make a plan for the week (or a few days) for what you will eat and have the food on hand to prepare, take with you, etc. Do not wait until the last minute to shop for your plan or shop while you are hungry. Stick to your plan! 2. Keep a food log. This is probably the single most difficult task for me because I hate doing it. I have done it for over 4 years. Every day. I write down when I ate (time) how much (quantity/calories) how hungry I was before (hunger level awareness) and satisfaction (knowing when I am satisfied vs. full/stuffed). I don't lie. Even when I eat crap, and I do, I know how much I ate and the calories I gave up to do it (so I make a conscious choice and take full responsibilty). I am a calorie counter, have no clue about protein grams, or carbs or any of that other stuff. 3. Drink Water. I drink 64+ oz, and a minimum of 4 cups of decaf green tea which seems to settle my stomach...I have a tendency toward gastritis. 4. EATING IS AN ACTIVITY UNTO ITSELF!!! No reading, driving, tv watching, talking on phone when eating!!! IF YOU EAT AND DO SOMETHING ELSE, LIKELY YOU ARE NOT PAYING ATTENTION TO THE FOOD OR HOW MUCH OR HOW IT TASTES OR HOW SATISFIED YOU ARE AND YOU WILL EAT TOO MUCH!!! 5. Never eat standing up. Animals eat standing up. People eat sitting down. 6. Don't serve family style. Plate your food (and if your family can take it, plate theirs too). Family style encourages large portions. If you have to get up to get more food you are likely to ask yourself if you really want it. 7. Before you eat, ask yourself on a scale of 1 (not hungry) to 5 (starving) "How hungry am I?" My kids have been doing this since they were 5 and 7...it was very funny to hear my son when he was 5 say...I am just a 2, I don't really want that fruit roll up! 8. Exercise. Minimum of 30 minutes/daily (or 6 of 7 days) of heart pumping, ass moving exercise. The cardiac benefits are wonderful, the self-esteem benefits are immeasurable. 9. Make peace with your scale. This is controversial! I weigh myself every day. It keeps me honest. I take full responsibility for both my losses and gains. Not sure this is for everyone, but it definitely works for me! 10. Never say never. I remember thinking that I can never have this food or that drink blah, blah, blah. Guess what? I can eat it all, and probably lots of it! I don't dump from sugar, I can eat and drink, I can eat like everyone else. Also, I EAT DESSERT EVERY NIGHT. Not a lot...but a portion (1/2 C low fat ice cream, 1 cookie). I do this because when I was MO if I denied myself, I would look for it later and eat everything sweet to try to satisfy my craving. 10+ Because 11 would be too much...NO EATING AFTER 8:00 PM. Sorry. Live with it. It works. So, there it is, my very long reply. Take it or leave it. Just know that you will continue to be successful if you find a lifestyle that is healthy, comfortable, reasonable and works for you. Karen

WOW! Profound! You've given me a LOT to think about, thanks! Wendy (also in her 5th year)

Hey...you had your WLS a week before I did! You look fantastic! I read your profile and went to your website...you can do this...you ARE doing it. You are living proof that with a little surgery and a hell of a lot of inner strength, you can do anything. Continued success in the best of health, Karen