Anger Issues

I'm new to the grad board. So please forgive me if this has been asked before. Have any of you had anger issues post op. What I mean by anger issues is........ Turning into a different person while driving, yelling at your family for STUPID things, being angry with the poor people who work at the grocery store for not (by my standards) moving fast enough. I feel like I have just turned into an angry b*tch!! I used to have food to fall back on, I STILL haven't found a way to deal with my everyday issues with out using food to stuff them. LOL I've tried working out (I go to the gym 4 days a week), I've tried breathing, praying, praying, and praying. LOL did I say praying?? This started getting bad about 2 months ago. I don't know what to do!! If I can't get this under control I am considering counseling. I cannot continue to act like this!!! LOL next thing you know my head will start spinning around!!! Thanks!! Heather

Heather, It sounds like feelings that were being "Stuffed Down" with food, Are coming to the surface. Yes, I would recommend counseling, And don't wait. We tend to have resistance to counseling Because it seems like admitting defeat or Thinking of ourselves as some how Flawed. If you broke your leg, You'd go to a Dr. that "fixes: broken legs. If you broke out in a strange rash, You'd go to a dermatologist. If you came down with strep-throat, You'd go to the Dr. to get antibiotics. Why do we resist having a Dr. work on our mind? The other problems would fall in the "hardware" category, So what if it's a software problem? Keep up the praying, and forgive yourself For being angry so you can start forgiving others For being slow, or foolish, etc... A counselor will be able to help you find the Key To getting rid of that "thing" that is Getting in the way of your "Natural Flow of Love and Excellence." Typically the way to "let others off the hook," Is to let yourself "off the hook." Don't pressure yourself to be "On" all the time. You'll find that once you stop holding yourself to Higher standards, (Because truly, we can't ever be perfect,) Then it's easy to accept others for what they are- People different from you, who are outside of your Circle of influence. They are how they are, It's best to accept the imperfections And even downright obvious flaws in people, Even yourself, And then Let it Go...... Keep up the praying, But see a counselor. Hope you find the real peace that was covered in layers of Anger, hidden behind layers of food..... Best Wishes- Dx

Dx, Sorry it has taken me so long to reply!! Thank you for your words of wisdom. I will look in to seeing a counselor. You are right you know......... somewere under all those layers of anger, behind layers of food there is a peaceful person hidding, I need to find her again because being angry just isn't me!! I want to get rid of that thing (as you put it so well) that is getting in the way of my natural flow of love and excellence. Thank you!!!! Heather

Hi Heather, Welcome! I have noticed that I now suffer from what I can only call PMS for about 4 days prior to the start of my period. I have NEVER felt irritable or *****y before surgery, now it's like clockwork. Sound like yours is a little more ongoing, I agree with Dx, maybe you should go talk to someone about it. Michelle

Michelle, Thank you for replying!!! What I'm feeling is perment PMS!!! It WON'T go away!!!!!!!! I am going to take Dx's advice and find somebody to talk to. Hugs!! Heather

Most of us self-medicated ourselves with food. I know that when I was anxious or bored, stuffing myself would induce a kind of sleepiness that passed for sedation. Perhaps you were doing something akin to that as well. Your 'drug of choice' is no longer on the table (so to speak). Its starting to sink in that that is the case. Place all of this is the greiving cycle as outline by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross (ala "On Death and Dying"). You have lost something precious to you (beside pounds). First you are in denial, then anger, followed by bargaining and finally acceptance. Is it possible that deep inside you simply making a pass through the process of loss? If so, do not despair that you are. It is normal. The critical need is to understand the process in which you find yourself, not get mired in any single step and continue the transition to the end. Its just a thought. Nowhere Man/PH/Jay

I love this theory and totally agree. I am now greiving my loss of food for comfort. I just never thought about it this way, and assumed I'd be past this stage by now, but maybe not. Thanks for thoughts!!

I think you might have something here Jay!! I did use food to self-medicate. When I was sad, happy, angry, overwhelmed, ETC...... you get the idea!! Should I be feeling these things this far out? Shouldn't I just be over it??? It is fusterating to STILL be dealing with this crap. I really appreciate yor input!! Thank you for replying!!! Big Hugs!! Heather

Everyone thought I had gone mad several years ago when I manifested such behaviors. I was quick to temper and very jittery. Pre WLS then, I had been maintaining a 200-pound weight loss for a few years. My outbursts were often related to accelerated activity (especially very physical -- like carrying groceries or moving furniture) ... I was a lose canon. Then I found out I was hyperthyroid. It's not *always* about the food -- or lack thereof. For ****s and grins, if this is really out-of-character for you, I'd have your thyroid checked -- especially if you have symptoms such as insomnia, irrational anger, brief periods, accelerated weight loss (i.e., faster than normal at this stage post-op), and bulging eyes (especially when you're emotional). I was only 40 then and thought I was going into menopause. Just be sure to follow your doctor's protocol if you are indeed diagnosed with hyperthyroidism. I didn't and it turned my life upside down.

Hi Melissa!! I will have my thyroid checked!! My mom is on medication, also my grandmother and Great Grandmother have thyroid issues. Most likely I do to. I have had it checked before, but after losing 121lbs it is very possible that my body has changed in this area. Thank you so much for this info.!! Hugs!! Heather