Hello, my name is Dx.......

OMG! OMG! OMG! (for Jays benefit) Hello, My Name is Dex And I am a Confirmed, Mean Spirited, Old Azz! Ran across a new post-op, coming up on 3 weeks out Preaching and "Letting Everyone Know!" "I would rather have died in two weeks while being fat, Happy & not sick all the time rather than go thru this ..." And my Fav- "I'd rather have quality over quantity." Why so down on WLS? Was not out of the hospital until 6 days after surgery! The staff didn't change the sheets on schedule! She's had diarrhea for 2 full weeks! Still gets nauseated, and isn't able to eat yet. She's clearly still in the- "What the Hell have I done to Myself" phase, So I should have just smiled quietly to myself And passed on by, looking for those who were Asking legitimate questions about where to find something Or Info on what others have done to make "this journey" easier. But then the line- "Don't you Believe those AMOS Cheerleaders," "This Surgery IS NOT WORTH IT!" And then there was the "swarm" Of Pre-Ops, replying and asking if they should "Post-Pone Their Surgeries," Or at least "Move to a different Hospital?!?" Well, Me, being a Southerner, And It being Sunday and all, I felt compelled to Preach! This person struck me as someone Who is taking Great Comfort In being a Victim of the WLS experience. The Hospital was inept! Others here on the Boards Had led her to believe It would be easy! (Whaaa?) She had been expecting to be back to normal In a week! She's still a little weak when she walks. I had to jump in with- You're at home? In the second week? Congratulations ! On your Super Smooth Recovery! I wasn't out of the ICU until starting into week 4! I wasn't walking until the 3rd Month! I was on a feeding tube for 5 Months! And yet somehow I was able to "Be a Cheerleader?" It just BURNED MY BUTT! At 6 months and still nauseated/vomiting? Then Biiche All You Want! But even then, Don't use your "Woes" to convince others To give up looking into the one thing That may Save Their Lives! But just coming into Week 3 ?!?! Then Shut the H*LL UP! Yep, I am a Confirmed, Mean Spirited, Old Azz! So here's my Legitimate Question--- How do you SUPPORT Someone Who is wallowing in the Victim role? Who is clearly, fishing for the "You Poor Dear..." replies, Rather than attempting to take charge of their recovery? I see New-Ops all the time that ask- "I'm still having a good bit of pain at my incision site, Any advice or Ideas on how to help this?" For those folks, I'll type out pages of things that have helped me or others. But when someone posts repeatedly (during their 1st few weeks, I'm still a little jealous) Just a constant list of "Reasons" Why those who are looking into surgery, Should pass it by? What CAN we say that would help them? Most of us end up with Quality And Quantity of Life As Post-Ops. Yes? Or is this just my "Pollyanna Cheerleader Self?" Any suggestions? Or just "Shame On Me" for thinking that there must be A way to Support everyone. Have a Great Sunday! Best Wishes- Dx

You really CAN'T support everyone (some just do not want it; or, will not accept it)...but, I will not say "Shame on you!" for trying... Some need a pat on the back or a hug...some need a kick in the azz......it's a judgement call sometimes. I usually look up their posting history (if I am not familiar with them) and, if they are always negative, I do not bother replying...if it seems genuine, I reply as best I can. I don't really know what else to do. Am I perfect post-op?...Nope, never have been (well...maybe at first...). I am going through food and other demons right now (first major Holidays since my Mom died) and some days it's a struggle just to breathe, let alone encourage anyone...on those days, I try to stay away from the boards (or lurk). Too many pre-ops, new post-ops and even grads (me included ) need to hear the truth (e.g. Wake up and take charge of your own life...nobody can make decisions for you or make the consequences on those decisions any easier to bear.), not candy-coated BS...JMHO. ~~Sherry (3 weeks, 5 days to go! )

Hey Mom! 3weeks and 5 days to go till Baby Day! Even without the WLS You would be having it rough right now. Get rest while you can, Once Alexis is here, It'll be like A series of "All Nighter" Sleep-overs For quite a while! Just remembering my son.... Have a great week! Best Wishes- Dx

Do my eyes deceive me? Did Dx bless us with a thrice-said OMG with bracketing blinky emoticons? Major style points coming your way. Some people enter into this WLS life with one thought in mind: I'm going to be skinny. Now by skinny, they somehow think that their teeth will be whiter, the colors brighter, everyone will send them invitations to the better parties, and they will become an "uber Willie Lohman" and be doubly well-liked. Telling them "it ain't necessarily so" is not going to be well received. Nowhere Man/PH/Jay

Recently I have noticed a new tone to the general message board... and it's kinda scary..... people snacking on candy bars three months out, people wanting to lie to their surgeons about smoking pre-op.... your comment falls right in line with these.... I always respond to these youngsters (now I sound llike my Mom) with a positive spin but let them know how serious morbid obesity is.... WLS isn't a modern trick... it's serious stuff and deserving of all one's might.... It saved my life and gave me a new chance at living, I mean really living... And I sure wouldn't place my personal expectations on others.... but I do let them know about my perspective... It's hard work that keeps getting harder so far... but I ain't complaining for sure... (She says as she ties her running shoes, heading out for a 4 mile run before her healthy dinner...) Keep the faith Dex... They need your posts!!! Laurie - minus 166 lbs!!