What's in a word?

Jay--I will never forget the first time I read my medical records and saw the term obese being used to describe me. At that time I considered myself overweight--a broad term to say the least. I was already miserable about my weight and seeing that term on my medical file made me get motivated and I did Optifast after that. I guess the term obese doesn't bother me as much now--as long as it isn't used to describe me:wink: Seriously though--I do cringe a little when I hear someone else using the term--frequently with a negative connotation. Like the other poster said--it's ok for me to call myself fat, but I really don't want to hear it from anyone else. Have a great day!

I am what I am. I am like an alcoholic, except it's with a weight issue. I might be normal looking now, but I am forever an obese person, I'm just wrapped in a normal BMI now. So, the tag just fits. I might not like it, I don't like to hear it, but I acknowledge it for the truth it is. The good thing now is I'm in remission!!!

Yep...recovering overeater

Hay Jay! Words rarely bother me when they refer to myself. But when I hear my 5 year old son refferring to someone as "fat" I get upset. I tell him "overweight" not fat and please don't say mean things...it hurts them a lot. Obese never bothered me because on my book that's a medical term...and to tell you the truth everyone I know is aware of my surgery so I really don't care if there's a magazine in my house with obese on the title... Good question...Paola

Well, it doesn't really bother me at all but it did the first time I read 'obese" on my medical records. Here where I live, very few people even know what the word obese is. Everyone is "fat". Even when I started reading this board my hubby askled me what is obesity. I can talk about being formerly fat or obese comfortably. I guess it is more of a culture thing with the word "fat". I mean, here, you don't go out and here someone say," boy that lady is obese." It's, "look at that big, fat woman."

I think they should retain the current name of the magazine. It was designed to provide information to those effected by the disease of obesity. Why should we sugar coat it. It's the same to me as calling a diabetic a diabetic. We don't call them "sugar challenged", and there certainly wouldn't be any issue with a magazine for those living with diabetes having diabetes in the title. Obesity is a disease--we are what we are, we should never forget, and we should be proud of what we've accomplished. thx g

Since obesity is the disease that we have fought/are fighting, I do not shy away from the term. I do speak my mind when someone refers to others as fat, etc. because it is (usually) being used in a derogatory fashion. Those that I have broached about this know better than to do it again, within my earshot at least. I was born a 'normal weight', became an overweight toddler, and a fat/obese/morbidly obese youth/teen/adult...anyone that truly knows me already knows about this...I see no reason to hide or act ashamed of it after the fact. By my not wanting a magazine in my home with the word(s) 'obese/obesity' in the title, I am only trying to hide the truth from myself, no one else...since, my circle of friends/family/acquaintances have pretty much remained the same. (JMHO) I accept anyone/everyone for who they are inside...the outer shell has never mattered to me. If someone decides not to be my friend, loved one, etc. because they've found out that I was FAT for the vast majority of my life...well, I wouldn't really want them as a friend/loved one anyway. "What is your relationship to you former, larger self?"~~~~~That relationship is still developing for me...I still see myself as 'that girl' each and everyday and I highly doubt that that will change anytime soon. And, that is alright to me for now, at least... ~~Sherry

The word obesity does not offend me, it's what I was for many many years. I still do not use the "f" word (fat) but I'm really not sure why. It's just a choice I make. "What is your relationship to you former, larger self?" Its odd because I haven't adjusted to my current size yet. I still allow more room to go through a space as I did that for many years. I also make sure there is more space to sit in a chair than I actually need now. I guess in time I will learn that I'm not as large as I was. -141 pounds 5'6" 13 months out.

Good topic and question. I use the word fat and always have, in my personal day to day. On the boards I use obese, obesity, morbidly obese, and super morbidly obese in reference to myself; often I will use SMO or SSMO....I was 5' 5" and I weighed 380 pounds. I'm not quite sure of the criteria for SSMO but I know for a fact I was SMO. The criteria is not of importance to me for the label. I only know I was dying daily, physically, emotionally and spiritually.....not to mention mentally, becoming lazy and sluggish. I had even stopped reading for pleasure by the time I had my surgery. What causes me to wince or worse? When I am sitting at Starbucks (or anywhere in public) and a person limps past me, obviously in physical pain from morbid obesity. I sit there and tears come in my eyes. I want to reach out and hug them and just say I care. I know that is inappropriate and there is no way I would say "Hey, let me tell you about my story".... But, damned if it doesn't hurt me all over again........feeling it for them.....remembering......and I suppose it always will. My relationship to my former, larger self is one of compassion and admiration. I had no idea how much strength I had and showed...how much determination I lived with daily. I hurt for all the years it took me to find this solution, and even though I would do it all over again, and would do it 20 years sooner if possible........I know I "got it" when the time was right and ripe for me. Thanks, Jeannie

Babble to follow- I'm not sure, (understatement) But I think this falls in the same category as- "To Tell, or Not To Tell." It seems to me to reflect the distance that people put Between "Themselves" and their "Personas." In my case, I always sort of "lived in my body" As others might "drive in their car." On some level I always felt that I was Not my body, only housed by it. Sort of like that OH Graphic of the normal sized Person superimposed inside of the "larger" silhouette. Not that I felt like a thin man trapped in an obese body But that I was Me, and the physical portion was just that "Mortal Coil" that I would shuffle off one day. The amount of detachment that one has From their physical being Varies from person to person. And I think that may have something to do with- "Always Fat? Or Newly Fat?" I can't remember a time when I was in a normal body So realizing I was Obese from the word on a medical record Didn't phase me at all. Nor did school yard "Name-Calling." If someone called me fat, It had the same impact that it would have had If they said my Clothes were Ugly. So? Those are just my clothes. That's just my body, Not me. So I don't find anything disturbing about having my body Labeled as Obese. That same detachment would still apply. I don't mind people knowing that I had this "old bucket" Worked on in the shop any more than I would if I was driving a car that had been "Fixed up" from a piece of junk. Although having such detachment Kept me a fairly happy, extroverted And outgoing person all of these years, It allowed me To reach and maintain a weight that was Morbidly Obese Without much personal concern. I didn't feel like I was "Less than" any one else, I wasn't ashamed, in fact, My personal "Self-Esteem/Self-Worth" was really quite high. It wasn't until what had been physically bothersome My whole life, began to be physically threatening, That I chose to take the serious step to correct it. I had dieted many times, But once you have over 150 pounds to lose, Making life miserable in order to drop only 10% Seemed too much of a Challenge. An unattainable goal. If I had a memory of when I had been of a normal size, I think I probably would have always felt that This Body was Me, and I had "Let Myself Go." I probably would feel hurt and shame at labels. I know I am offended and upset if someone slanders or Attacks my integrity, my artistry, my character, etc.... My "Qualities." Those things, I am unable to view as separate from Me. What is "Personal" for one, may be quite "Public" For another. The title of the Magazine? That to me really does seem insulated by layers of separation. But if that sells more Mags? (And that is what it boils down to, right?) The motive behind that- More people will be exposed to more information And everyone benefits. If leaving a copy of Obesity Help Magazine Sitting out in my office doesn't bother me, Why then would I possibly resist leaving out a copy of- "Nation Health." Or "Changing Monthly" Or what ever the new name might be? (probably "OH!" Any one taking side bets?) Best Wishes- Dx