Emotional feelings about this MB

I wonder if any of you are feeling what I am at finding this message board. It it like when I first found OH. I am reading all the posts and smiling, thinking "YEAH! That is how I feel." You all have been or are or will be where I am. We have so much to offer each other on this board. It is almost like coming home again. I have been pretty close to some of you in the past and to those I owe a HUGE SORRY! I can think of 2 I owe the biggest sorry to, Celtic Rose and Elle. You 2 ment and still do mean so much to me, but I know I sort of just dropped out of site and didn't even respond to email. There really is no good excuse why I did not. I did and still adore you. Maybe I was burned out, feeling sorry for myself, feeling like a failure, and maybe things I am not even sure that I was feeling. I am sorry for what I did. I am hoping that I was just burned out after working for OH and now that I am rested and no longer a part of OH as staff I will get back into posting and such. Who would of thought you could get burned out on a job you really like. Well liked for the most part. All jobs have sucky parts to them, even being a mom has sucky parts. Anyway.................. I am rambling so will sign off for now. LOVE YOU ALL! Theresa

aww Theresa you have inspired and given so much to so many.... its time to absorb alittle love and girl you are definately loved... Thanks for all you have done for all of us girl... I can't agree more that its awesome to be here.. feels like a homecoming to see so many I respect and feel part of them... and u again.. yer my hero girl... love you to bits chickee dee deb

Theresa, you owe me no appology. I have missed you like crazy and I still love you. I am here for you as well. As I now, no longer volunteer for OH, I find myself more able to enjoy myself and posting. It was the best decision for ME! I'm here for ya, whenever you wanna talk. ELLE

Dearest Theresa, I feel the same as you, and I have a confession to make, I am much happier on these boards just being me, without Mod attatched to my name.... This room is wonderful, and even more wonderful with everyone starting to come back in.. we had a great group on the MB, but I honestly think we out grew it, and now we need more answers to our personal questions and problems, that only others can share with us, that are walking in our shoes.... By no means is this a hit on the MB's, it is all where we started and learned, but we do need our own place to continue learning, and I thank OH for that.... As for you Darlin, I think we both got burnt out, we spent all our time on the boards, and even put these boards before our family's... Was nice to take a break, and just when we came back, we found this great room.. Oh I hit email you on here, I don't know what address it went to, but sent you my new number... and no I didn't put my code back on the phone, it will just ring up here... lol... check that out...... please call me when you have time, would love to chat with you, and set up a meeting in Bangor..... Love you more.... Val

What you don't feel particularly close to me?! Theresa--seeing everyone here--it is like coming home again. The main mb was a HUGE support to me when I was initially researching the surgery and as a new post op. Somehow it had lost it's appeal over time. Anyway--I know you deal with depression and wondering how that is going? I have been dealing with some sort of depression too--I call it a funk. Not responding to emails and phone calls even to people we care about--I think that is part of it. BTW--I absolutely adored being a MOM, but it definitely has it's sucky parts. Ya know what though--it is the funniest thing cause for years my kids looked at my husband as if he could do no wrong. He's really a good guy--but definitely has his faults--just like the rest of us. We are exact opposites. They (my kids) seemed to sometimes look at him as perfect and me as a loser as they grew older. Finally they are appreciating ME and realizing Dad has his flaws. Oh well that is just my two cents.

Thank you to everyone for your responses, it is such a wonderful feeling to have this support!!! To Linda, I have been thinking lately that the med I am on is not working like it use to, but am worried to go to my PCP because I read on a chart that if my meds did not work the next step might be the need for counseling. I have tried it and find it does not work. Maybe I am not ready to spill all that I need to spill, but I just know it isnt something that will work at this time. As fun as camp has been, it isnt all laughs. There has been some HS attitudes this summer from people I thought were friends. I do not get it, but oh well, I AM PAST it. I refuse to get into that behavior. Also, DH hates that I have been down here the entire summer, I am here for the kids and yes, maybe to get some time away where I am not accountable for every moment of my life. DH is a great man, father and husband, but I am constantly "needed" by at least one member of my family. Here I get a break, the older 2 kids come and go pretty much as they want, even though they do have issues since they are teens or almost a teen. But at least I can point to the door and say GET OUT and do NOT come back till you have a better attitude. After being gone from home for over a month I am ready to go home, if only for one night. I really need my hair cut. School starts soon enough, then I can go back to workin out while the little ones are in school. For anyone that thought life would be perfect just because you lose weight and you look normal, well it doesn't. There are always issues, just the ones with your weight go away. Well sort of go away. I am rambling again. Theresa

I felt such a sense of relief...I feel like finally! There are people that feel the way I feel, understand what I am going through, thank God! I had come very close to leaving here and trying to find another board with long term post ops because I just could not relate to what is going on with the main board. It feels so good to be able to see you all, alot of you I remember when I was a pre op and am grateful to see you here again. To be able to see your progress, to read about how your lives have changed, and to recognize the same demons you have as in myself....it makes a big difference.

AMEN on the demons girl... sometimes I think Im going to drown in my drool when I get headhunger cravings for some things that I KNOW i dont need .... going grocery store shopping is the worst lol.. deb

This board is what we all have been searching for in our journey. The next step on our way to perfection. We will all always be here for each other. Sometimes we stumble and need a hand sometimes we need to reachout to some else who needs a hand. Welcome back to everyone.

OK.... guess I have to put my Rule Police Hat on. You have broken rule # 1 in the Friends Handbook. The rule says "Friends never have to say they are sorry. Just change and move on." You owe me nothing. I was sad to see you drop out but I suspected you needed space for a bit. Like I do with all friends, I email a few times and if nothing comes back I just assume that space and quiet is desired. As a friend I respect that and stay quiet but continually wonder about that friend anyway. All I can say is that I am glad you are back and I am HAPPY to see you return. No judgements. No "why didn't you answer me?". All I care about is seeing a friend who is better now and back. Welcome back and I hope you stay for a bit. Carolyn