Alrighty Then.....

So within a weeks time I've been put on two acid blockers: Prilosec AND Zantac. I am to take them together twice a day. I am also on Celexa so I was told to be really careful because they aren't supposed to be given together.

I have a referral for an Upper GI and while I was there I made an appt. for the nutritionist. I can't believe after 8 years I'm sitting in a doctors office about in tears over my weight. I said this is HARD, hard as hell and no one who hasn't been overweight, severely overweight for a very long period of time can understand what this feels like. I am 43lbs heavier than I was 3 years ago and I'm afraid it's only going to get worse. He started telling me about some weight loss drugs that might work. He was being nice and trying to be helpful but I DO NOT want to take another FLIPPING pill!!! I have a box full now! The good news is I'm down 2lbs since my last visit with him last thursday:)

He was shocked to learn that my lowest weight was 170. He asked me how tall I was and kind of made a face. I said I was walking, going to the gym and doing Zumba. It wasn't like I wasn't trying. I look at all the people who look so skinny after wls and that was NEVER me! I tried like hell but it was Never me!

Feeling so...

Gaining 43 pounds in 3 years is only an extra 137 calories a day. Are you weighing and/or measuring your portions and tracking your food? Exercise will not overcome bad eating. Track your food and go from there.

I hope they get your health issues resolved soon. You can do this!!

I'm headed to the nutritionist for my first visit since being 6 months post op. We PCS'd 6 months after my surgery and I haven't seen a nutritionist since. My doctor did mention trying the bento boxes. I think that might help with my portion control and I do need to make better choices. I need to plan my meals again because if I'm standing in front of the fridge hungry I'm not making good choices.

Wow it looks wild when you do the math!! Thanks Laura!!!

You can lose it again; believe me!  I had RNY in 2009 and went from 330lbs to 175...then moved overseas in 2010 and stay until 2013.  During that time, I didn't have access to the protein and everything like we have here in the US, so I ate like everyone else and got back up to almost 200.  I moved back in 2013 to the US and I didn't go right back to the gym.  It took me several months and struggling through last winter with arthritis pain to realize I needed to get moving.  I think that in my mind, I thought eating would make me feel better and it only made things worse.  I was falling back into the trap all over again.  In the spring of 2014, I got my butt back in the gym and back on my protein.  Here I am, in December of 2014 and I weight about 170 (maybe right under but I don't wanna jinx myself).  I have a lot of loose skin to deal with but I am mixing in cardio and weight training and doing my best.  I am scheduled to have a tummy tuck in two weeks if I can get my iron up.  I think it's so easy to fall back into old thinking and old habits, and sometimes we need a reminder.  Sitting in the doc office crying over your weight was maybe the reminder you needed like my pain I felt last winter.  I just was determined I couldn't hurt like that this winter or ever again.  The cold kills my bones and joints!  I know I'm going to have moments...I'm human.  But, God willing, I'm trying my best and I know you can too!  Where are you?  I'm near Charlotte, NC...I saw you are a southerner :)  Good luck!

Thank you for your inspiring post!! Yes, you are so right about old habits creeping back in. I find myself saying the same things I used to say when I knew my eating was out of control. I am playing the same "head games" with myself. The nutritionist I was recently assigned to is very sweet and easy to talk to. He used to be a therapist so that helps too I am so lazy about preparing food. My NUT suggested I try to use bento boxes. Have you ever used those? I am SLACK on protein, however, I did find one that is delicious. I need to go ahead and order it and quit procrastinating. I had started walking my dog every morning and doing 20 mins on the spin bike but when it got cold and nasty I stopped (lazy woman's excuse, I could still do both). I sit in my house everyday, just me and my doggies and wait for the kids to come home from school. I clean and bake(I send it to work with hubby for the other soldiers) and that's pretty much the extent of my existence these days. I miss living on a military base and being around other military wives.  I know I'm a little depressed and need to get back out there, it's just that saying it is easier than doing it. I was working and I made some really good friends, I might go back next school year. Boy looking at this post I look like such a Debbie Downer...lol. Today seems to be a whoa is me day....I'm blaming the weather 

Currently we are stationed in Virginia. My husband works up in Arlington but we live in Manassas.

I wish you the best of luck and I hope that you are able to find a lot of new and refreshing information from the nutritionist that will get your mind back on track.  I often times have the same problems and I get so mad at myself about it.  I've never tried the Bento boxes but I do buy the small Tupperware and use it everyday so it is the same thing I guess.   At work it's easy because what you have here, you eat and that's it...it's being home which is harder for me.  Even if there is only healthy food there...I wanna eat alllllllll the time!  I think we can do it...

I told my hubby I figured it out....I need a personal chef It was interesting what I found out talking with the nutritionist. I very much enjoy making food for other people but I just don't put any time or effort into what I make for myself. I am totally a grab n go during the day and I know I make Bad choices. What types of protein do you use? I tend to handle chicken and fish much better than red meat. I meant to tell you I had a tummy tuck in 2010. I'd love to have my thighs and arms done. I recently found some pictures I'd forgotten about and actually found on here, no one could believe it was me. I really needed that boost!! It's easy to forget where you've come from. Yes, I think we Can do this!!

Also forgot to mention I'm originally from Georgia but for a few more years my home is where Uncle Sam tells us to go:)

That's funny!  I am the SAME way...I prepare food for my family but for myself...I haven't ever put myself as a priority.  However, I have made changes in even my husband and kids' food that causes them to eat a lot of what I eat and that's helped me a lot, while I feel has helped them learn to love some better choices too. 

I have a chicken issue...I think it tastes weird nowadays and I don't like it really anymore.  I cook a lot of turkey breast meat.  I also eat a lot of plant based proteins like beans, lentils, nuts.  I try to mix plant and animal proteins to get a bit of each.  I also make shakes still...usually only one in the morning for breakfast and I eat 1-2 Quest bars everyday too.  They have a lot of fiber and almost no sugar...usually 1-2g. 

We definitely need those reminders about how far we have come.  I know that we forget that.  I look back at my pictures and I still just stare and think...how in the world did I let myself go and not know it?  I didn't even feel it and I didn't feel my size but when I see the literal surface area of myself, I can't really believe it.  I think about how I grew up and what factors from my childhood and upbringing played a part.  I think about choices and decisions I made and how I can make these easily avoidable obstacles for my kids.  I hope I am doing that. 

I've always been a SC girl and when I married 13 years ago, I moved to NC but it was literally 10 minutes away because we live near the state line between Charlotte, NC and Lancaster County, SC.  I also, would like to get my arms done...we'll see what happens with that. 

With the tummy tuck, you did it as an outpatient?  What type of garments did you wear home?  Did they give you a girdle of some sort to wear immediately, even with drains in?  I was just wondering how that worked out if you knew.  Thanks!!!

I am going to go ahead and say this: the tummy tuck was PAINFUL!!! In some ways more painful than my RNY(I had an open). Where they cut you for the tummy tuck is in a spot that gets used so much that it's hard to avoid the pain. Getting up and down, going to the bathroom are the worst. I did mine as an outpatient. My husband drove me, and he had to wait until the surgery was over and then drove me home. Before surgery I went to walmart and bought some really baggy pj pants and just used my hubby's big tshirts. Trust me when I say you will NOT care what you look like. Dummy me had mine done during winter and when I got home the driveway was all icy and covered in snow:(

My neighbor was so sweet she came over through all the snow and ice and emptied my drains and cleaned it all up for me. My poor husband couldn't handle that part of it. For the drive home I brought a pillow and held it tight to my stomach to keep from feeling any bumps. I learned that from my mom, she did the same when I drove her home after her hysterectomy. It will probably be the worst 3 days of your life and then it slowly gets better. I was amazed the first time I put on jeans and didn't have a behind in the front:/ I think I have some pictures from mine I'll have to look for them.

What a big help to know all of this and especially about the pillow!  I need to go to Wal Mart this weekend and get me some big pants because I have one pair at home but I don't think they are comfortable enough for this kinda thing and a big size shirt.  The pillow info is great to know!!!

Yes, I emptied my mom's drains when she had hers done recently; I remember they are kinda awkward.  But, it's a small price to pay to be able to feel what you say about being able to wear pants without feeling like you have a rear in the front!!!