What to do...

I have had Gastric Bypass surgery about two years ago and lost 90 pounds and feel great. I did have many many compilations which partly has to due with my issue.

The issue i have is that my brother is in serious need of weight loss surgery. Now I know from personal experience that you cannot pressure a person in to this decision, it is a choice they have to make on their own. My family is very worried about his weight he is 5"6 and weighing in around the 380's. I'm nervous that he will get sick and pass away. If someone at my biggest weight came up and told me I need to loose weight I would be so offended, and I don't want to hurt him. But I also know that he watched me go through a really difficult time with my bypass. I don't know how to talk to him, I'm no sure whether or not to give him all the books that I have from my surgeon. I don't want to push him but i don't want him to pass away from something preventable. Any thoughts

I would simply ask him how you can help him and let him define it for you.

Best of luck!

You can be a positive influence but it is his decision.  Bariatric surgery only works, long term, for those willing/choosing to change their lifestyle.  Give your support for whatever choices he does or does not make.  If you are 2 years post op, then he has seen you since your decision to have gastric bypass - so he "knows" about it.

It is difficult to see those we love no change destructive lifestyles - but we love them anyway.

Best wishes, Penny

My husband had RNY Oct 2012. I went through the entire process with him, all his nutritionist and surgeon appts and even the first two psych visits (he did the testing alone, of course) and was highly offended when the surgeon asked me what procedure I was interested in. Even at 300+ lbs, I could not see the need for *me* to have surgery. Then a friend posted a photo her daughter took of the two of us and it was like being slapped in the face by every person on earth. I was reeling from seeing that on FB and called my PCP bright and early on Monday morning and met with the surgeon not even 2 weeks later.

I tell you all that to tell you this: Until I saw for myself the need to have surgery and CHANGE MY LIFE, nothing anyone said or did would have made a bit of difference. There is a man in my support group who said the exact same thing. He'd stop going to a doctor if the doctor even said he was overweight. This man was in size 60 stretchy pants! He was 500+ lbs and in total denial about his weight. 

So if it were me, I'd say to let your brother know how happy you are with your choice (assuming you are) and that even with your complications, you'd do it again and does he have any questions and then you'll pretty much have to leave it at that. 

Hugs to you!