Feeling like a failure at this moment..

Hey guys,
i have not posted in a long time..this december will make 3 yrs out. i have been successful in losing 100lbs but i have gained about 20lbs since last year. i already know what i gotta do..just gotta go back to basics but it is sooo hard to do now that its been so long since the surgery..any one else gained any weight back? if so, how did u get re-started on the motivation factor?

You are not alone.  I was 3 years out this past November and have gained about 20 also.  I am trying to psych myself up not to do the 5 day pouch test to try to get that full feeling back and break the carb habit.  I feel like I "broke"  my pouch but hopefully I can get back on track before 20 turns to 30 and so on.  I realize this will always be a lifetime battle.  We have to nip it in the bud!

You're right. It's hard but you just have to do it..Otherwise, you're in that spiral place where you feel like a failure and then you don't do anything about it and feel MORE like a failure..

You aren't a failure, you just need to get back up, dust yourself off and get moving. Start with a small thing like journaling your foods..no changes, just figure out what you're eating and what needs to go..No judgement..If you are eating 1800 calories, well alright. If you're eating 2800 calories, well alright..

Then start with what looks to be wrong..Instead of eating a donut, eat an apple. Instead of eating a sandwich, take the middle out of that sandwich and have a cheese stick..Instead of parking yourself all day long, grab a bottle of water or a hot tea and go for a walk..

You have to see where you ARE before you can figure out how to get where you want to be.

thks evry1..will try to get back on track again cuz i kno i gotta..

I understand exactly. I feel like such a loser. I feel like my surgeon and everyone busted their ass to "fix" me and I have just ruined it. I literally can't stop myself from eating and especially sugar and carbs. I have gained about twenty pounds and hate the way I look. I am embarrassed to go see my surgeon and my new insurance won't pay for therapy. So I feel stuck and like a piece of crap.

First and foremost, we all still have our tool and it will work for us.  Please do not use excuses such as "I just can't stop eating xxxx......."  BECAUSE YOU CAN.  YOU'VE DONE IT BEFORE!

None of us are failures.  Every day we have to make a conscious decision about what we will eat and whether or not we'll exercise.  Some days you make better decisions than others--but we are in control whether we want to admit it or not. 

The farther out I get the more I am so grateful that I have built quite a bit of muscle and became a regular exerciser.  I "sin" too, but the exercise is my saving grace.  I'm still at my lowest weight since surgery---maintained for a full year now....and guess what????  THIS IS THE HARD PART....MAINTENANCE IS A DAILY STRUGGLE.

No one should be trying to live off of the small caloric amounts from the first year after surgery.  We should all be eating a pretty "normal" amount by now.  The difference is the CHOICES of what we put into our mouths to make up that amount each day.

1)  Go back to basics--eat 6 small meals a day--minimum of 1,200 calories per day (while you want to lose--you'll need MORE when in maintenance if you follow #2!)
2)  EXERCISE!!!!  Weight train AND cardio!!  5x a week minimum.  DO NOT TELL ME YOU DON'T HAVE TIME.....EVERYONE HAS TIME...make it a priority.  NO negotiating on this one.....there is some type of physical movement EVERYONE can do.....you need to find what works for your fitness level.
3)  Get off the carbs/sugar.  This should be a rare treat.....not part of our every day diet.
4)  Weigh once a week.  Same time, same day. 
5) Journal everything you put into your mouth, and journal your exercise.
6)  Come to OH daily for support.

I wish you the best as you continue on your journeys....the first step is being responsible for what you are doing to your body--and making the changes necessary to respect your self and make your self a priority.

I know, tough love...........but some times you need tough love.

Kim

Bravo Kim!!! 

Kim,
Thanks for your post.  I have regained about 8 pounds and it's driving me crazy.
Your suggestions are most helpful.

I have started walking further and jogging some - really different for me!!!
I have a hard time journaling but I know I must do it - I need to track what I need to change.
I do get in at least 75 grams of protein and 60 oz water - am slowly upping the water.
No compromise on my vitamins - take them religiously.

Everyone keeps saying the tool is still there - I just need to jump start it and get it in the losing mode.

Thanks again = it's so easy to get a "failed" mindset - that's a great part of my problem.
I can not gain back what I have lost - I really think I would not survive if I went back to my former weight.