Don't want to be a failure....

 Cravings and desires are just feelings.  They come and go and we don't have to act on them.  Meditation is enormously helpful for me in handling feelings.  If I eat to satisfy a craving, it just makes it that much harder to ignore it the next time.  I HAVE TO LIVE WITH FEELINGS AND NOT ACT ON THEM.  It's just body chemistry.  IT WILL PASS.  

What happens is that restriction and malabsorption start to wear off after the end of year 2.  That is when most of u**** our lowest BMI.  We feel that we are now at a normal weight, so we are normal people who have been cured of obesity.

That is such a great feeling and so not true.  What normally happens is that we start eating the wrong things sometime during year two, but malabsorption keeps us from gaining weight until about 30 months.  We might not lose anymore, but we pretty much stay at a normal weight.  So we think that we can eat like we used to.  Remember what we weighed when we ate like we used to eat?

It is hard to remember that we are still have the disease of obesity and our bodies will be happy to take us back to our old weight.  I am fighting with regain now.  I have gone from 128 at the end of year 2 to 142 at the end of year 3.  It does not feel good, but I am having a terrible time controlling my eating.  I can eat whatever I want, know what to do to keep from dumping, and get lazy about exercise.

It is depressing and it is part of the journey.

You ladies are exactly where I am!  It's so nice to have people who understand and who are struggling with the same issues.  I'd love to get to know you all and to join any who are holding each other accountable and/or supporting each other.  (I posted on the main forum just a few minutes ago "Two years status post RNY and up 10 pounds.")

Cynthia

This is all some good reading.  Thank you everyone for taking the time to post!  I'm 13 months out and 5 or so pounds from goal.  I already worry about a year from now because I notice that if I don't exercise and allow grazing (which I've has a few of these days)....I don't lose.  Eventually, this will equal a gain. 

Thanks for letting me listen in!  It's nice to have a place to go and stay encouraged because as we are all finding out...it's never really "over".

Thanks to everyone for posting. This is my fear. I am starting to regain. People around me don't understand, because with all the weight I have lost in the past year and the change they see in me, they just think I'm talking smart when I say I have gained 6 pounds. But I am horrified with those 6 pounds. I think I will start writing everything and posting on the "accountability' thread I just saw. I need to feel connected to folks who understand.