Back to basics

Good evening everyone!

I'm sitting at my computer tonight doing some personal inventory, journal writing, and general reflection.

I've been struggling for a while now with my weight and more so with the food choices that I've been making. At almost 5 years post-op and originally 94 pounds lost I'm pretty disappointed that for the past two years, since my son was born, I've been carrying around and extra 20-25 pounds (depending on the day!).

So, I've been working on finding the willingness and motivation to get "back on track". And I think I've figured out my problem. It's psyhological... I'm "too far post-op" and have "too little" to lose. The urgency I felt for this process 5 years ago just isn't here now. I sort of feel like (and others view me as) the average woman bemoaning that she needs to lose 20 pounds.

But here's the thing. I'm not that. I'm the person who has such a powerful food addiction that by the time I was 30 I weighed close to 250 pounds, hated myself for it, and felt totally hopeless to do anything about it. I'm the person who 5 years ago when my doctor and his nutritionist handed me the post-op food plan I thought to myself "I will do ANYTHING and EVERYTHING it says and follow it to the letter because I can't make my own food decisions anymore."

I got ****y and started thinking I could make my own decisions about food and still be successful on this journey of mine. Boy, am I wrong! How badly have I needed the humbling to get back to where and when I was motivated. I'm just grateful that I didn't need to regain more than 25 pounds before I found it.

So, tonight, I dug out of my file cabinate the post-op food plan I got handed back in 2005 when I had my surgery. And Tuesday morning I am having an adjustment. Except in my head, on Tuesday morning I'm going in to have my surgery done, again, for the first time. Catch my meaning? I'm returning to the place in my head where there was urgency and humility. I'm going to use the post-op food plan as my post-adjustment food plan and I'm going back to basics.

Those rules are now going to be my rules to live by. Wish me luck!

Thank for listening,
Elizabeth

Tuesday morning I'm going in to have my surgery done, again, for the first time

Why wait until Tuesday?  I always find it funny how people get motiviated to do something but then start...tomorrow.  If its such a great idea, why wait?

Yeah... no the point is that I haven't had the motivation, and am still struggling to find it. I'm hoping, hoping, HOPING that the the experience tomorrow will be a motivational encourager and help me to get what I've don't have yet.

Hi Elizabeth, that's a great way to look at things. I'm about 6 years out and I can feel the extra weight creeping up. I want to go back to the basics as well. Can you send me your post-op food plan. I'd like to try it on for size. Unfortunately, i've lost contact with my surgeon and I have mis-placed my old plan.

I'd be happy to send it to you, but it is several pages long so I don't think I could type it out easily. If you want me to photocopy it and mail it to you I will definitely do it!  Private message me if you'd like me to do that.

Oh wow!  I read your post and that is exactly how I'm feeling and going through myself.    I have found 30 extra pounds I didn't want back and my clothes which I have worn comfortably for the last 6 years are now too tight - ugh!!   I just can't seem to get motivated!  I wish I still had the copies of my post-op food plan but thanks to Hurricane Ike almost 2 years ago I lost everything in the flood.    I'm glad to see I am not the only feeling like this.

Pamela

 

Me too!! I`m 3 1/2 yrs. out and have gained about 10 to 13lbs back. I`m need to get movitavated again.

I'm with you, too!  I just passed 4 years out and never quite reached goal.  While I'm happy where I am for the most part, it would be really cool to reach goal and see a BMI under 25!  I like the idea of having my surgery over again.  I, too, need to revisit some of my food choices and use my tool!  Good luck with everything!