3 year anniversay

Well---three years ago today. I was frightened to death as I embarked on my new life. I was full of hope, and terrified that the gastric bypass wouldn't work for me. Also scared i would die on the table.

Three years later, while I could never say this has been easy, I know I'm successful.

I have lost every single pound I needed to, and have kept it off.

I exercise vigorously at the gym every work day--last year got up daily at 4:30 in the morning to "make time" in my schedule.

I fight the food demons every day. Some days are better than others. I make good choices most of the time, but certainly make bad ones, too.

I cherish my new-found health and am happy and proud to be where I am.

I live in fear of losing control, and of gaining it all back.

I enjoy all the new things my body can do and enjoy being in it.

I have no answers or wisdom in particular, but I wish each of you out there health, happiness and peace.

Love
Kim

 Hi Kim,

I will be celebrating my 2 year anniversary in a couple of weeks and I agree with EVERYthing you wrote. My doctor's office said that year 2-3 was the most difficult and I'm dreading that year for fear that I will regain my weight. I think about this every day and am still surprised when I look in the mirror each morning and see a thin person versus the obese woman who used to look back at me.

I also exercise daily and use all of the tools I was given. I wonder sometimes if I will ever feel "normal" and not have that fear of losing control. I thank you so much for your post, because we share something very special...that for today we were given tools to help us fight this battle that we've lived with every day of our lives. For today we can make choices and hopefully most of them will be good ones. For today we are healthy and fit and slim, and those demons are being controlled.

Congratulations on your success and may it continue. Hopefully in a year,we'll both be here posting about another successful year!

Kathie

Awesome...I felt and feel the same way. I'm several months past my three year surgiversary and still feel occasionally afraid of getting out of control. It's my biggest fear. I find that I respond negatively to other people..About a week ago a friend of mine said she was SO glad that I'd put on a few pounds because I look so much better. I focused on that "couple of pounds" albeit subconscentiously and still lost the two pounds..I sure didn't need to lose weight but for some reason..

Occasionally, I fast because I want to keep control. When I think even for a moment that I might be out of control or lose control...I'm back at it.

me too..... isnt it strange... I was addicted to food and it controled me.... now i still feel as if it will take over again if I dont keep it in check  and at the same time.. I feel it is still in control... reading labels all the time,, always having to be careful what i eat.. I actually obscess over what to eat..   anyone else do that.?

My family is starting to tell me that i dont eat enough... but i still have 15 to 30 lbs to lose before i have to worry.. 

It could take over. but it doesn't have to take over...You're vigilant..You're paying attention to the way you feel so it won't take over. And as for the last 15-30 pounds? If you're exercising and building muscle..those numbers might be fake. The number on the scale isn't the end all and tell all of how you are doing. If you never do lose 15 more pounds, you probably don't really need to..muscle really does weigh more than fat.

A girl from the RNY board is the same body image as me. Wears a size 6, same height...but she weighs 160 and I weigh just 127..why? She's so muscular, she could break me in half! 

Always being careful about what you eat isn't a bad thing. Skinny people usually are very picky eaters. They really are careful about what they eat..I think that's a great thing!

I don't think the fear ever goes away either...

I dont think the fear ever goes away.. Congrats

Congratulations on all of your success!!!!

OMG, I never come to this board anymore because, well,  I have a life now.   But I am now 16 months out and have stopped loosing for about 4 months now.  I am at goal but gained back about 4 pounds in the past 4 months.  I am now maintaining without much effort but scared to death because of that 4 pounds which I knew would probably happen, that I will be fat again.  I am dreaming of waking up hugely fat.  I can't take it anymore or these dreams.  I came here today to see if I am alone in this fear.  I also feel I will never live in peace where my weight is concerned.  I just hate this feeling.  Glad I have others to at least talk to about it.