I need to confess

Ive been having a very very rough (self inflicted ) time thse days. I have been eating my feelings and it is obviously getting the best of me. I have put on 7 pounds and in 5 years I never even put on a pound. I am ashamed. I know how it happened and luckily I know how to stop it. I dont feel like I can tell anyone because I couldnt bear to hear the "I told you so" line, everyone has been waiting for my WLS to fail. I know 7 pounds is nothing but its even for me to know I have to stop eating my feelings and its enough for people to start saying the bypass failed. anyway  I jsut had to vent. I also have been avoiding this board when I know I shouldnt. I have decided today I will not eat after 7 pm even if I am lonely and bored. DH goes to bed at 8pm for work reasons.  I am left alone with the recliner, remote and refrigerator.  Tonite I will walk on the treadmill while I watch TV. I know I cant change everything at once, I have made this bad habit a lifestyle for months now but tonite I will walk instead of eat.

Diana
RNY 9/17/03
360/200/no longer aiming for 180  just wanting my 190's back

Oh Sweetie! I could never let anyone tell me I told you so either. I'm so sorry that you feel you have no one you can confess this to but I feel good that you felt as if you could come here to confess.....I know those sorts of people and they are poison. No poison in this corner! 

You're right about one thing at a time. Just a small thing can make such a difference. Good for you that you hit the treadmill and not the fridge.

You're human. Humans fall down. The difference is falling down isn't STAYING down...Get on your feet, dust yourself off and head out again...You can do this..

Hi Diana,

I can relate!  I was having cash flow problems any how, but have now been laid off.  My final check came late and they still haven't agreed to pay the unused vacation they owe me.  Until that's settled, I can't start the paperwork for my severance or apply for unemployment.  So frustrating!

So yes I'm also guilty of stress eating and gaining.  I never lost what I gained over the holidays and now I'm up 10 lbs!  I also got shingles a few weeks ago which definitely contributed.  I know I have to get on with my life, but I still feel in limbo and will until I get my money straightened out.

But you a failure?????????  Are you kidding??????????  How can you possibly think that after doing such a great job at maintenance?  Stop worrying about other opinions, you've proven yourself!!!!

At night, OH and the other boards help me.  If I'm typing away I won't eat.  You might want to try that after walking.  I think giving back to the newbies is important, so I try to answer what I can on the main board.

Michele

Diana, good for you for posting here today.  It's always so tempting to avoid coming on the boards when it's not going well, but something in you knew that's exactly what you needed to do.  Good for you.

Stinks that there are people around us that are just waiting for us to fail.  I suspect I have a few of them too, especially at work.  Heck, I may even have been one of them in the past, and I would have had such evil thoughts out of sheer envy that someone took the bull by the horns and had the surgery and I was still messing around with dieting, losing and regaining.

You have done amazingly well, you woke up at 7 lbs. regain -- good for you!!! That's just the way it's supposed to work -- recognize the scale is going up again, identify where you've gone wrong and reverse the trend.  I have no doubt that you can shed those extra pounds.  I'm in your corner, you go Diana!

-Jasmine

Hi Diana! I've been missing you around here, so its great to have you back!!!! I'm sure you remember I posted about my Halloween thru New Years regain~it sucks!!! But, you've identified the problem and you know the area to work on so you're going to be fine! You're a fighter so wls will never fail you b/c you'll never give up or give in!!!! You're an inspiration to me!!! Like you, I feel if I gain weight people will talk~I know its really no one's business, but I certainly don't want to hear "I told ya so!" from anyone! You hang in there and keep us posted on how things are going for you and you know if you ever need to talk, I'm just a post away!!!!!!!

((((((((HUGS))))))))

Hi Diana,
Kudo's for you and your post! What a success you are in so many ways. You will get those 7 pounds off because you are doing it for you and only you. It's so easy for all of us to fall back on old habits. Keep doing that treadmill after hubby goes to bed.

"Reach for your mate instead of  your plate...don't debate...lose that weight"!!! LOL!

You m ight want to just go to bed with hubby at 8pm...what cha think of that one?
I'm like you, when I'm lonely I will reach for food.
I'll be so glad when Spring and Summer get here. I miss riding my bike all though I love going to the gym with my workout buddies.

Sending you hugs, you are doing wonderful.

Oh tell me about it!  You and I have the same husband!  LOL So me and the TV are really close friends at night... I am stressing out big time for several reasons...and I totally relate as well as so many others that replied as well...

My daughter is preggers and craving all kinds of sugary sweets....Last night I came home  from a healthfood store (Trader Joes) with all kinds of healthy stuff and there were frosted cupcakes on the counter!  OY!  Cap'n Crunch Cereal, chocolate chip cookies...chocolate covered cookies...WHITE BREAD! Toffee candies....I was like OMIGOD!!!!  The bakery exploded and landed in my house!  You want to talk about having to be strong? I have freaking cupcakes on my counter!  I cannot resist cupcakes...I just cannot....

One bit me last night and it didn't even seem to matter that I had a belly ache for two hours....This is bad!  Can I sleep over at your house til the baby is born or is 18 or something?  LOL  I'll bring my exercise CD's!  LOL

Hang in there!  We gotta get thru these rough spots...Both of us...5 years...Can't throw it away now!  Hugs!

Diana, I can so relate to what is happening to you. My DH goes to bed at 7pm each night as he gets up for work at 3:30am each day. So........ like you I am board and lonely and have seen the scale creep up several pounds since Halloween.

But, remember our tool still works if we use it as intended. I wish I could get myself exercising, good for you getting active. It does help lift our spirits along with giving us energy and helping with weight loss. You can lose those 7 pounds. Just take it one pound at a time and before you know it you will be be where you want to be. You are a success story, not a failure, DON'T YOU FORGET THAT!

HUGS

SHER

Hi Diana. I haven't been here for a while and thought I'd check to see how everybody's doing. You've done such a good job keeping your weight off, and getting back up when you fall down. It's an inspiration to me at 2.5 years out to see people like you still working at it. I've had people watching me too, just waiting for me to blow back up. Some of my co-workers and neighbors (especially the heavier ones) would get their jollies if I'd gain a lot of weight back. It's sort of motivation to keep it off.