Update, apology, wt loss, alcohol/transfer everything but the kitchen sink, yeah long, thanks

Hi Tracy,

Yet again, thank you for your insights that you share.  I always get a pearl of motivation and inspiration from your posts.

Cathy

Thank you so much Cathy!!!! You are also an inspiration to me!!!!

Hi Vicky,

Ditto, ditto to what you've posted and Tracy posted back to you.  I've done therapy throughout my life and found it very useful.  When I regained some weight, I decided to try coaching and it really made a huge difference.  Whichever direction whether therapy or coaching, getting to the issues that cause us to abuse food and emotionally overeat are what make up weight loss success. 

I'm a major Type A'er too!!! 

Take care, Cathy

Im  not a big poster.  Mostly  a lurker  but am around a lot.    This is a heart tugging post that I hope gets the kind of replys that she needs and deserves.  
 From the replys that I have already read  I truely believe that  you are some of the most caring, sensitive compassionative women in the world.   I am truly proud of be a part of such a group even if I dont post much.   
Mellissa I will have you in my prayers  in the coming days  

I'm glad you posted this too. Each of us has our demons. We fight with the outside world because they don't see us as their cookie cutter "normal" and we're not..We are our own "normal". Normal is as normal does (Forrest Gump).

The very first step is admitting the problem and then you can address the problem. We're all here to help and listen, even if you fly off the deep end.. I have done it myself.

Reading the posts above has me looking at finding a therapist myself so I'm sure we can all benefit from a good listening knowledgeable ear around here..I"m not qualified so do search for someone...I'm going to.

Melissa,

I wish I could shake your hand.  Knowing there is a point when help is needed is huge.  Major step.  Now, get the help!

The suggestion of a counselor is very timely.  At this arena of the WLS journey, we begin to readjust to all of life's issues and find we do not have our best friend food to comfort us and help with x y or z.  We choose (yes, we make the choices) some paths of more destruction.  Get into a support group/therapy for WLS issues, food addiction, alcohol, coping, self preservation!  Find the avenue that helps you walk the path you choose to follow.

Use the community.  Keep yourself accountable.  Be in charge of your health and happiness!

DO YOUR BEST!  Because YOU can do it.

Vicky

I don't have much time right now, so I'd like to post again later.. (maybe not even till later this week). But bottom line of what I have to say is.. I transfered my food addiction to an alcohol addiction, very heavy drinking for a while, but alcohol made me hungry not LOSE my appetite, so I continued to actually eat more.. This got it's worst the begining of this year and the worst part lasted about 5 months, drinking a lot and eating every two hours (as much as I could) including during the night. It took me a regain of almost 40 lbs before I came on here seeking help. Since being on here I've managed to WAY reduce my alcohol and food intake, not enough to lose weight, but I have at least maintained for two months and stopped the FAST regain I was experiencing. Just the last couple weeks I have started attending AA. How many times does one have to say " I will NEVER have another drink!" (as I saw how my life/health/relationships was quickly spiraling down) before one seeks outside help? Since attending AA I haven't had a single drink and have now started working a 12 step program for my food addiction...only done this for a few days. I really think this might be MY path to recovery (I was slowly killing myself). Everyone's needs are different, but counseling never did a whole lot for me. I really love the daily contact and committing to a sponsor, and with my particular 12 step program for food addiction I have a VERY exact and strict food plan to keep me abstinant (which plan almost exactly mirrors what my surgeon wanted me to do). So I have come very close if not to the letter to where you are...and I am working my way into recovery, I reallyb elieve I can do this, and you can too. It looks like you got to the point I got to two months ago...only you got there BEFORE gaining 40 or 60 lbs..and THAT is significant...this is serious, we need to not bru**** under the rug, so good for you for seeing the direction you were headed in time! You WILL be ok because you've already made the most important step, acknowledgment! Keep me/us posted with what you decide and how you do and never, NEVER give up. And it's ok if the struggle continues for a little while, it's direction not perfection, and YOU, my friend, are definitely now headed the right direction. I'm impressed and proud of you for making this post, it's not an easy thing to do. I made a VERY similar post about 2 months ago! I wish you the best! And keep in touch with us. (ok..so i said about all I wanted to say, so I'll consider this my post and not wait till the end of the week, it didn't take as long as I thought it would! lol)  *hugs* Leslee

I was so glad to see your little face today. I've thought about you several times over the last couple of months. You should never be embarassed about your problems. We're all fighting our own demons. I'll say lots of prayers for you, and I'm so glad to see you fighting for your health and happiness.

 

Hi Melissa,

I'm so glad you posted here.  The WLS Grads Board is a wonderful board.  I hope you'll stay and consider it your home too.

At one point or another, we've all been where you are.  Some of us weave in and out of feeling strong and then challenged. 

You've reached out and been honest and open in where you are and where you've been.  That's huge.  Whether alcohol, food, shopping, whatever - it is about managing our emotions and coping with situations in our life.  Food or any other misused substance isn't the problem but the symptom of the problem.  For me, I became a coach because I think that is where wls success is in getting to the issues and moving forward past them into where you want to be in your life. 

So many of us felt after we had surgery we had it made.  Yeah, we heard about healthy habits but that doesn't hit home until we find our malabsorption rate lessening and the old habits creep back in that made us heavy in the first place.  I hope you get from this thread and my post that you ARE NOT alone.  Not by any means. 

I don't think you screwed up.  I think you made the assumption that many of us made.  The great thing about being a wls post-op is that even though we don't know each other personally sometimes, we know each other because of the commonality of being morbidly obese, pre-op and then from the post-op journey.  You are not alone.

Thanks for sharing with us and posting so honestly. 

Take care,
Cathy

I recognize this eating behavior. I have it. I'm not eating because I'm hungry. I'm eating because I need soothing. It relaxes me and sooths the anxiety that I have. I would do it with alcohol or food.

You are not alone. I wish I new of ways to stop it, but I don't because I am still working on it. I do know that support from others is a really good start, and keep working at it is the only way to conquer it. I believe we will have to work at it every day the rest of our lives.

I try to stop myself in the middle of my munching and say "what are you doing. You could eat this whole thing and it still won't be enough." Sometimes I'm better at it than others. I strive for 80% perfection

Thanks for the post.
Heidi