Allow me a pity party here for a minute.

Not the Same Dawn
on 5/8/08 11:39 am - BEE EFF EEE, CA
We had a dinner for an administrator who is leaving and we all were asked to say a few words about her that night. They video taped us and I got to see what I look like on video tape. The kindest thing I can say about myself is that I feel more comfortable in my skin than I look. I look hideous. I look like a shriveled up old woman who is just horrible looking. My hair is thin, my skin is hanging...Whoever was suppose to tell me to wear a bag over my head is FIRED!  I didn't even recognize myself. I don't feel like I look like that. I feel like I look rounder, if that makes any sense.. So NOW my self image is really low and NOW I'm wondering what the HELL did I do to myself. OH God, now don't cry, you'll look completely pathetic... I knew I could say this here cuz you guys will understand..So now the question for me is: Paper or Plastic...yikes I'm horrible.
Yes, RNY worked for me but it also requires a lot of work from me!

Before Surgery: 214
Highest Weight: 240
Now: 125.6
Goal: 130
Carla W.
on 5/8/08 11:53 am - CA
RNY on 05/08/06 with
Girl.. now u get yourself up and dust yourself off.. we all think we look terrible.. remember whether its fat or thin.. we are our own worse critics.  Now you look wonderful.. those stupid cameras make everyone look like )(*&^(.... You know you rock so go shake your thing and smile.. the people *****ally count think you are beautiful inside and out. Carla

Not the Same Dawn
on 5/8/08 12:28 pm - BEE EFF EEE, CA
Of course, you're right. I know. I just didn't think I looked that THIN...How could I miss that?
Yes, RNY worked for me but it also requires a lot of work from me!

Before Surgery: 214
Highest Weight: 240
Now: 125.6
Goal: 130
(deactivated member)
on 5/8/08 12:12 pm

Hey, Darlin'... Please don't be so hard on yourself... your new self... the one that will adjust over time and meet up with most of your expectations.  WLS is a blessing and .... ummmm... not so much a blessing at times.  The "mirror" is confused within our brains many times and for really good reasons.  Many post-ops have felt the way you are feeling right now so it almost seems like one of the stages of mourning...stages of change.  It's the "what if" in the "what the Hell".  You've come this far; don't let disappointments, any comments, or second guesses defeat your spirit.  The video is "as permanent" as how often it is viewed... I bet it gets shelved soon.  You have revised your goal to increase your weight.  That was the plan... is the plan... Right?   Sending you a ((((BigHug)))) XOXOXO Ro

Not the Same Dawn
on 5/8/08 12:41 pm - BEE EFF EEE, CA
YOu're right, of course...It's like hearing your voice for the first time on audio tape. THAT I'm used to. Seeing myself on video, not fat, is going to take some getting used to. I just don't recognize myself. I don't look "right" or something..I guess it will take some time to get over the shock..
Yes, RNY worked for me but it also requires a lot of work from me!

Before Surgery: 214
Highest Weight: 240
Now: 125.6
Goal: 130
(deactivated member)
on 5/8/08 1:16 pm
That's an excellent way of describing the feeling!  The audio tape... we've accepted very well! So seeing yourself  THIN  will take some getting used to!   Get Out The LIP GLOSS!!!   It's time to celebrate being THIN! Try this shade...especially after you get a bit of a tan... You'll look HOT! Ro
Tracy B
on 5/8/08 8:19 pm - Erie, PA
I have to agree with the other ladies~don't be so hard on yourself!!! First off, not many people look great on camera. Secondly, I think we all go thru a phase of "not recognizing ourselves" whether it be on tape, in pics, in the mirror, etc. I also see your 10lbs below goal~do you think you'd be happier with your appearance closer to 130lbs?? I know alot of people feel like they've dropped too low so they put a few back on and then they feel much better. Also, at 3+yrs out, I can say that even if scale weight doesn't change, things do fill in and round again (a fact which I hate, LOL!!) Although I'm the same weight, I do appear a slightly larger in the thighs, butt and arms and slightly slimmer in the stomach~thankfully I have stayed in the same size clothing, but alot of people feel this phenomenon around 2.5-3yrs out. Anyway, here's a ((((((HUG)))))) for ya!!!! And remember we are our own worst critics!

~*~Tracy B~*~

328/160 *** 5'9"
start/current

Not the Same Dawn
on 5/8/08 11:27 pm - BEE EFF EEE, CA
I really appreciate the support from you...I promise to try and get used to who I am now. It's hard but I can do this. I do like myself. Actually I love myself but only because I think I'm pretty damn smart. It never used to matter what I looked like, I was smart. And now I'm healthy because I was SMART enough to do this WLS thing.. I'll have to get used to how I look now. I'm trying to gain alittle weight and round out the rough edges. I'm sure I'll be okay.  You're so sweet to chime in here. Thanks!
Yes, RNY worked for me but it also requires a lot of work from me!

Before Surgery: 214
Highest Weight: 240
Now: 125.6
Goal: 130
Tami H.
on 5/9/08 3:10 am - Winter Park, FL
Tracy your new hair color is just lovely. I haven't seen you since the meet and greet when you were a darker red. I am so happy to see how your life is blossoming, and your sweetie and you look so nice together! Keep up the good work, you do look amazing!!
blessings, Tami Remember, nothing tastes as good as THIN feels!! http://www.marykay.com/tami
Tracy B
on 5/9/08 3:44 am - Erie, PA
Hey, Thank you so much!!!! I love the lighter color, especially for summer. I really need to post a new pic, but I'm having camera issues~mine died so I've been using my son's Kodak EasyShare which I have found isn't so easy to share, LOL!!!!
Most Active
Recent Topics
×