Part of my Problem

Tracy, Thanks for sharing your thoughts.  It really gives me "food for thought" so to speak.  I am never happy about the number on the scale and it isn't like I don't exercise and lift weights everyday. So I'm not on the couch eating junk food and watching tv.  I did get brave the other day and put on a swim suit to play in the back yard with our granddaughter, spraying each other with the water hose...that was so much fun, I was a little worried about being seen, but my granddaughter loved me taking the time to play with her, so it was worth it.  Maybe is if I stop worrying about how I look and just enjoyed the moment then it would be ok.  Who cares what my neighbors think anyway, now to translate that to the beach...that could be another story, so I think I will continue to work on it in my backyard for now.  I guess we all want to be perfect one way or another.  Again thanks for shaing.

Tracy  I   so  understand to  ready  your  post  ... I  can't  wear  anything that  is  shorter than  3/4  lengeth sleeve  doesnt matter  if  its  shirt or  a  night  gown  ..  And  Never   could  wear  shorts  or  even  a  tshirt  ..  I  know I  have   mental  issues  .. I  get  so   upset  if  my   house  is  not  in  perfect  order  .. I  truly  believe  its  a  blessing  in  some  things  but  truly  a  curse  in  others  ..   So  your  not  alone as  you  cans  see  there  are   many  posting here ..   Hugs  to  all  of  you , Tami

Hi Tami! Yes, I also have the perfect house affliction as well! People always say "oh your house is NEVEr messy, it always looks perfect"~not always true, but if someone is coming over it definitely has to be in tip top shape! I have always known that was my OCD at work~things have a place and that's where they should be, in order, perfect. Its exhausting sometimes.

Tami, tami, tami, PLEASE come over to My house!!! LOL Hugs,   Piggy

Deb, Good for You for getting out there with your granddaughter!!! That's fantastic!!!! I do have to say that this is the first summer in years that I've worn shorts and tank tops. Its like in my head if I don't look perfect than I'm not perfect~nonsense I know, but that's  how I feel. Most people can walk around and think "I look ok today" and be fine with being ok, but I can't just be ok, I feel the need to be "above average" in everything~even if its only in my own head, LOL! Just crazy, I know!

Girl, I can so relate.  And I have stuck with my therapy long enough now to know where it all stemmed from and why I am like I am.  Goes all the way back to some incidents that started in my early childhood and of course the fact that my mother and grandmother are both OCD.  Runs in the family.  Lucky me.  Stick with the therapy.  It may take a while but it eventually does work.  It is just something you have to stick with for the long haul.  I still go now every 2 months for maintainance visits so that I can stay on top of things.  You will get there.  You are already making very good progress just recognizing the issues.  That is great.   I have actually learned to let go of alot of things that I used to have to have perfect.  Like my house. And as time goes on your therapist will have you let certain things go to an extent that you can live with and be comfortable.   Don't get me wrong, I still have my days and I do still struggle sometimes but I am much much better than I used to be.  I do now walk around at the beach in my swimsuit.  That is a major deal for me and it took alot to get to that point.  Good luck.  Melissa

Thanks Melissa! Its good to know that I'm not "crazy", LOL!!! Funny you mentioned things that the therapist will have me let go of~she currently wants me to go out to a store or whatever without having to be all made up with full makeup and hair~AHHHHH! She even said to start at Walmart at midnight if I have too just to get out there without having to feel as if I look "perfect" and then gradually progress from there. I did it once, but was highly uncomfortable, so I guess I will have to try again sometime. I'm not giving up!!!

Girl, I had to do that one too.  And I started at the beach.  Maybe that is cheating since many people don't get all made up at the beach.  But I do.  LOL.  And then I progressed to Walmart.  But that is one thing I haven't ever been comfortable with doing.  I like to have my hair fixed and my makeup on when I leave the house.  LOL.  But I did do the exercise of going out without being all dolled up just for my therapist.  LOL.  I tell ya, it sucks trying to be perfect all of the time and even worse that we feel we have to.  But we will get there.  You have a great weekend.   Melissa

I won't even wear pants to work because I'm afraid they'll show my butt too much. It was 62" around before WLS (yes, more than a tape measure will measure), but now it's about 37.5", so it just can't be as big as I think it is. I see bigger butts in pants all the time up here, but for some reason I'm afraid people will faint when they see mine. I'm thinking of buying a pair for the winter and giving it a try.

Wanda, so do you just wear skirts and dresses??? For me, I don't like to wear skirts and dresses b/c I hate my legs, LOL, but I feel fine in capris, jeans or dress pants. I hope you buy a pair of pants and see how you feel in them~Good Luck!