Body Image and Weight Goal

Hey guys I need some advice and thoughts about body image and my goal weight and wanted to ask you guys who are going through it and some who are just starting to see what you guys think.  Sara and I talked about it this am and now I am curious 1. Did you pick a goal weight before surgery? 2. Is your goal weight different than your surgeon? 3. Does your family think you are too skinny or could get? 4. Did you use the BMI chart to pick your goal? 5. Did you use a number from high school (pre kids/or post as well) 6. Did you pick a number where you were happiest? 7. Do you look your weight currently? 8. Does your family know your weight high/goal? Do they agree with it? 9. When do you think too much loss needs intervention? 10. What are your thoughts on dieting now after surgery? 11. Did you get nervous about numbers when you got to your year post op? 12. What did you choose weight or size of clothes as a goal? Ok, I think that about covers all of my thoughts.  Thanks so much for your opinions as they mean alot and it is always interesting to see all points of view.  thanks....  Tanya

1. Did you pick a goal weight before surgery? Yes, I chose 140 as my personal goal.  2. Is your goal weight different than your surgeon? I told the surgeon my goal was 160 because I didn't want to be unrealistic.  3. Does your family think you are too skinny or could get? I got down to 123, and they definitely thought I was too skinny.  My mom even went so far as to tell me I wasn't pretty any more.  My surgeon also suggested I gain about 10 pounds back.  4. Did you use the BMI chart to pick your goal? No, I just chose a number that sounded good.  5. Did you use a number from high school (pre kids/or post as well) No.  I have been overweight since age 11, so I don't remember being a normal weight. 6. Did you pick a number where you were happiest? Never remember being this weight before, so no.  7. Do you look your weight currently? I weigh myself daily. 8. Does your family know your weight high/goal? Do they agree with it? Yes, they knew my highest weight and knew my goal.  They also know where I am at now.  Everyone says I look much healthier at this weight and that I should stay at this weight.  I would like to lose about 7-8 pounds.  9. When do you think too much loss needs intervention? My family was considering intervention for me at 123 pounds/loose size 4 clothes.  They kept telling me I was too thin.  Finally my doctor agreed as well.  10. What are your thoughts on dieting now after surgery? I think I will always need to diet.  I am still obsessed with food, and I think about it all the time.  Now I am just obsessed that I am eating too much. 11. Did you get nervous about numbers when you got to your year post op? No.  I had already gone below my goal at a year out.  12. What did you choose weight or size of clothes as a goal? Weight at first.   As I got to that weight though I decided on a size I wanted to be.  I got down to a size 4.  I am currently in a size 8, but I would like to get back down into a 6. 

1. My personal goal was 150lbs

2.I never got an exact goal from my surgeon. 3.My family hasn't said that yet, but my mom has stated that I shouldn't lose much more. 4. No I didn't use BMI chart to pick my goal 5. My number is one from  the age of 20. 6. Yes 7.I can't judge that, but I am much happier when I look in the mirror. 8. Yes and yes 9. I am not sure, we are each individuals. As long as we are eating healthy I feel our weight will stabilize. 10. My thought is not to diet, but keeping to a healthy eating plan, protien,good carbs and small amount good fats, along with getting in all my water and regular exercise needs to be my new way of living from here on out. 11. Yes, only because I had wanted to meet a certain goal by then and I wasn't able to get there, but I just reset my goal. 12. At first it was weight as my goal but lately I am using clothing size as a new goal. I would like to be a size 10. Not quite there yet, need just one more size. Sher

1. I had an idea of where I would *LOVE* to get to, but it was really just a dream back then! 2. Finally at  my 6mth post op appt I asked my surgeon what he thought  my goal weight should be. After doing some figuring he came up with 165lbs. I said I would like to get to 150lbs (the previous dream weight I mentioned). He said I would probably make it there, but might not like my body at that weight or find it hard to maintain such a weight at 5'9".  3. My dh is fine with  where I am right now, but he does not want  me to lose anymore. At Christmas time I dropped pretty low in weight and my mom told my dh that she thought I was getting too thin. That  didn't last~it was just a stress related weightloss and now I'm back to where I normal am. 4. Not really. I was 150 at a younger age and I felt really good about myself at that weight so that's why I wanted to get back to it. I did look at the chart to see what weight would put me in a normal range though.  5. Not from high school, but from my early 20's after I had done Nutri System. This was before having my children. 6. I would say happiest with my weight and happiest with how I felt about my body, but not necessarily happiest with my life. I'm much more happy and content now as a wife and mother than  I ever was in my early 20's with all of life's drama at that age.  7. Look my weight meaning do people think I look 150-154lbs??? If I tell people what I weight (which isn't very often except for around here) most people think I weigh less than 150lbs~but again, I'm 5'9" so I can carry my weight easily.  8. My dh doesn't know what my highest weight was and neither does anyone in my family. I'd say everyone is fine with what I weight now.  9. Intervention is needed if someone transfers addictions from overeating to anorexia, bulemia or continues to struggle with obsessive overeating.  10. I try not to say that I'm "dieting" but I am cautious and watch what I consume. I will try to follow the rules as much as possible and stay on top of any small gains so they don't grow into big gains. I think that dieting is what got me into this predicament in the first place~yoyo'ing for many years just helped me to gain more and more weight. Now I try to eat healthy and live an active lifestyle.  11. I've always been nervous about the ##'s and I probably always will be. I knew that I had lost more than the dr expected in the first year (losing 164lbs meant losing half of my body weight by my first year anniversary when I weighed in at 164lbs *started at 328lbs). I wish I could learn the mentality of saying "its only a ###" but I'm not there yet. I still worry daily when I  weigh in.  12. Weight first and foremost, but I did always want to be in single digit clothing sizes. When I finally made it there I was thrilled!!!!

1.  Way too many questions. 2. I am within 10-15 lb of what the weight chart says I should be and am very happy at this weight.  I am a size 10-12, look good and am told I look good at this weight.  Hence, no further need to lose weight.