My Time Out Update

Hi all, I haven't posted in a while - been extra busy at work and then went out of town for a couple of days.  The trip out of town was actually to see my bariatric surgeon. He was pleased with my progress - I had lost a total of 18 pounds when I saw him.  He wants me to lose more - at this point about 22 or 23 pounds.  I have lost 4 since Friday when I saw him. I haven't been perfect with this and I'm not beating myself up over it.  To show how messed up I am, I went out to dinner with a friend after seeing my surgeon.  We went to a Chinese buffet (opportunity to way over eat).  I was amazed at how little I could eat.  I had about 4 spoonfuls of my soup (hot and sour) and two shrimp and a bite of chicken.  I was so uncomfortably full that I thought I might be sick.  Before the time out, I could have eaten the whole cup of soup and a good sized serving of the stirfry.  I had no noodles or rice.  And the good news is that the fullness lasted all night. Anyway, I am back on my time out - haven't had all I should for the last few days because I have been ill.  I had a fever over 102 Monday night and went home from work and collapsed on the sofa.  I had had one protein drink that day and had nothing else but fluids the rest of the night.  I worked Tuesday but again only had the one protein drink and felt so bad Tuesday night that again, I didn't have anything.  Wednesday I stayed home from work and did have one drink and a salad.  I just couldn't force myself to get up to make the drinks. I'm back at work today and feeling some better.  I still don't want to eat or have a protein drink but I will - I know I need the protein or before I know it, I will have a blood sugar headache.  I dearly love this lack of appetite - now the real challenge is keeping the head hunger away. I stayed over in Wichita Falls after my appointment so I could attend the support group meeting on Saturday.  I had no idea what the topic was but knew I really needed to be there for motivation.  Much to my surprise and amazement the entire meeting was devoted to regain.  According to current statistics, about 85% of WLS patients will regain up to 33% of their loss from the surgery unless they work at not regaining.  The three most common reasons for regain are:  Grazing, Lack of Support and Loss of Motivation.  The leader spent a great deal of time on each area and had testimonies from about 15 patients about their personal battles. Grazing is obvious - one chip or cookie can easily lead to the whole bad over the course of a day or two. Lack of Support is a little more complex.  When we are new postops, every one is rallying around us - families are supportive as are friends.  But as we reach "normal" (whatever that is), that support wanes.  People get on with their lives and we aren't an issue anymore because our bodies aren't rabidly changing.  We tend to think that we have conquered obesity and stop attending support group meetings or we quit posting on online boards like OH.  Then when we regain a bit, we go into denial and are ashamed and embarrased to admit that we have gained because, after all, this is supposed to be forever.  Well, gang, NOTHING IS FOREVER UNLESS WE WORK AT IT DILIGENTLY. Loss of Motivation is a lot like lack of support.  When we are losing rapidly, we get all kinds of comments and compliments and we are really motivated to get the weight off - and it comes off pretty easily for most of us.  We see the clothes getting larger and larger and our bodies getting smaller.  It's a high like no other.  Then you stabalize and the high is gone.  Family and friends no longer compliment you about your loss and you aren't buying smaller clothes.  It's hard to stay motivated.  Then, if you are lucky enough to have some reconstructive work done, you get motivated again for a while - til those changes become hum drum.  Then stress enters and you turn to your old friend - food - and the motivation to turn away isn't as strong as it once was.  And we slip - then stumble, and some, like me, fall. So we have to stop the slipping and stumbling and if you have actually fallen you have to pick yourself up and get motivated again.  The bottom line is that you must do this for yourself, not because of the compliments or because of the high you feel from seeing the scales and the sizes go down.   This has to be a life time committment to eating right and to being healthy.  Basically, for many of us, it means dieting - I know, that's a dirty word but it's reality.  I have had to face the reality that I can't tolerate starchy foods - they are addictive to me and if I eat just a little, then I get out of control.  It's best that I treat them like an alcoholic should booze - avoid it completely.  After all, who would advise an alcoholic to have just a little wine - or a drug addict to try just a tad of cocaine? Well, I guess that's enough of my rambling for today.  I didn't hear anything Saturday that I didn't already know but it was reinforced for me.  And it did help me to find out that I am not the exception to the rule - that others are fighting the same battle I am. Good luck to you all. Patty

Wow, Patty.  Thanks for taking the time to update us all. I am so glad you are ok and I am so glad to hear about your progress.  You are amazing in your ability to stick with this plan. Hats off to you for being able to follow doctor's orders. Wow.  I also went back to liquids for about a week and a half and really kicked to carb demon to the curb and also lost 8 pounds! Thanks for your insiration, Molly

Molly, It's terrific that you lost the 8 pounds.  The carb devil is truly evil - at least for me. I don't think of myself as an inspiration - just a person *****ally needed to get her act together.  I refuse to go back - life is too good to throw it away on food. Patty

Patty, Thanks for sharing your progress and what you learned in the support group meeting.  How long did it take you to lose that 18lbs and was it just from the Time Out?  I know Dr. Warnock has used the same reference to alcoholism and drug addiction when talking to me about food.  I was bawling like a baby the last time I saw him because what he said really hit home.  At least for a month or so, then I was slowly going back to my old ways.  I wish I weren't a food addict and I wish I didn't have to work so hard at losing and maintaining my weight loss.  I know that some people never have to worry about it again and that surgery just magically drops them down to a size 2 and they live happily ever after.  That's certainly not me, but I guess I should quit feeling sorry for myself and just get on with my life.  There are lots of people who live without consuming carbs all day.  You know, there is a quote that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over but expecting the outcome to be different.  Well, I always go back to eating my "normal" food, which always makes me fat.  I will work hard to lose some weight, then return to the old ways expecting a different outcome, expecting to stay slim.  Total insanity.  I need to just focus on what's good for my body and let go of the things I know aren't right for me.  I can't just have one serving of chips or one bite of cake.  It triggers a binge every single time.  I know I should treat carbs like drugs because that's what they are to my body.  They relax me and soothe me for about 30 minutes, then drop me face down in the gutter wanting that comfort again.  I will drive 30 minutes away to get my favorite donut if that's the "fix" my body wants.  It's crazy.  I am so glad to hear that support groups are addressing this and other people are conquering their addiction to food because I know I am not alone.   I think maybe I'll look into a support group here in Austin.  I tried one at Ft. Hood where there were lots of Dr. Warnock's patients, but they were all new post-ops and none of them understood what I was going through.  At that time I had only regained about 20lbs and I was still so small that they just looked at me like I was whining.  None of them had answers and there wasn't anyone there with any medical knowledge or much post op experience. Anyway, I really appreciate that you share so much information.  The Time Out plan that you shared really helped alot of people on here and it has spread like crazy.  So many people are motivated and inspired by what you share.   Congratulations on your success and good luck on your continued journey. Thanks, Angela

Angela, I could have written what you said about carb addiction - they are definitely drugs for us.  I am like you with chips or crackers - I sure can't eat just one or one serving.  It's more like one bag. I think the new data is making a lot of the doctors realize that regain is a definite problem.  And the insurance companies are watching closely - looking for any reason to not cover the surgery.  I was thrilled with the meeting - it was like providence that the topic was regain.  I so needed it -even though I know intellectually, that I'm not the only one - it's comforting to see other people who have similar issues.  I know that doesn't sound nice but, after all, misery does love company. We were told upfront that WLS is only a tool - not a cure.  I got so tired of hearing that and reading it.  I knew that I would never regain.  And I went almost three years without significant gain and then it just blossomed.  I'm not making excuses - but the fact is that I am a stress eater and the last two years have been extremely stressful and I went back to almost every bad habit I ever had.  The only difference is that I didn't go as far overboard as before - the quantities were less but just as dangerous.  After all, you can drown in an inch of water. The only bad habit I didn't go back to was drinking Classic Coke.  I was a total addict before surgery and Coca Cola in any form will not ever cross my lips. I hope you can find a meeting in Austin.  If you can't - join us on Dr. W's board on Yahoo and call and talk with Dr. W.  He will give you guidance and comfort.  Just talking with him makes me more determined to conquer the addiction. Patty

So good to see you back Patty - and congratulations! I, too, am struggling with regain. So far 9 lbs gone - yeah!!! I think lots and lots of people battle this but are too embarrased to post about it. Amen Sister on the Coke. I went back to the real stuff - sugar city - and it seemed like my scales moved up by leaps and bounds every day. We live and learn, live and learn. But we've got WLS on our side! Best of luck and again great to see you back here!

Thanks Bette.  I think the loss of  support and motivation are two of the most significant things we have to deal with.  I know that when I was posting on here on a regular basis and when I attended the monthly support group mettings regularly, I didn't have the problems I've developed.  So it's time to turn it around. Patty

Thanks Patty! I needed to hear what you wrote!  And way too much of it hit home. Deb

Awesome words!! I'm cutting and pasting this so that I can keep your words from your support group!! Thanks for sharing!

I second that.

I am only 5 months out and it's amazing how differently my body reacts to carbs!

If I eat my regular protien meals - yogurt with a little berries and walnuts, beans, protein (with milk) shake, meats etc.. I have a very dulll almost non interest in food. If I eat pasta .. the rest of the day I'm wanting more! Same with bread ... more!

AND ....I'm realizing that I suddenbly become sleepy and tired and I don't want to do anything but sleep.

Okay girls .. I'm looking at you all as my Rosetta stone of what NOT to do.

CARBS = EVIL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!