How do normal people handle it when Life Sucks?

Hey,, ,sorry to hear about your tragedy's..  I ask too.. how do they deal//// just like us... I think...  I must say I am guilty !! I turned back to food...  (and man can I eat!) Save yourself... stay strong and remember normal is normal for you... not society not the world just you!

Hi Donna, I am so sorry to hear that food is your best friend still.  Remember when you turn to food that best friend is and can kill you.  Let's try some of the suggestions here and get back on track. I love the hot bath one and exercising although my foot is messed up and for now I am not moving..... You hang in there and you can turn this around.  Try to get back to the basics and come here for help ok?  You can email me anytime and maybe we can get back on track... Take care, Kathy

In therapy I learned that most of us who have addictions that help us in life have learned through the years due to upbringing or life cir****tances to try and not feel things.  We swallow our feelings by eating food.  That way we don't have to acknowledge the feelings or pain that is around us.  The first thing my therapist did was help me to relearn to feel and accept my feelings.  Our feelings are ours and whatever it is we are feeling is okay and acceptable because they are our feelings and we should own them and accept them.  So, needless to say in the first weeks of therapy I had to cry a lot and get angry alot and all sorts of other things.  I think people who are normal with no addictive issues accept their feelings for what they are and accept whatever it is that is happening to them and allow themselves to deal with those feelings naturally by laughing, crying, screaming, stomping, talking it out, taking a step back, etc.  As easy as it seems it should be, it is just not easy.  And I still struggle to this day.  So, when I start to struggle and slip I just call my therapist for a refresher visit.  It's all I know to do.  I am sorry for all you have been through lately and I wish you the best of luck getting through it all. Lots of hugs being sent your way, Melissa

Hi Melissa, I am thinking of going to the local hospital and using their scream room.  I think I would feel so much better!!!! Thank you for sharing and the encouragement!!! Take care, Kathy

Kathy:  I'm so sorry that you're going through all of this pain!  I think you have gotten some great responses here, too, and I don't think I can add anything else to the list except my support.  Sometimes writing things out here is a great way to help us deal with our feelings.  Please keep posting and let us know how you're doing.  It sounds like a cliche, but time really does help us get through the worst things in life.  Take care,

Carlita

 

Hi Carlita, Thank you so much!  I am going to call a few friends with little ones and ask to get together.  What a great way to get back on track and get passed the loss than to be with and watch the little ones laughing and playing.... Take care, Kathy

Hi Kathy, I am so sorry to hear you have so much loss, and in such a short period of time.  I wish I had a good answer for you, I have no idea what normies do, I think they eat, drink, use whatever it is that gets them through the tough times. My father died very suddenly last fall, in fact, we had to remove him from life support after he fell and hit his head.  I was recovering from my tummy tuck and had just reached my weight goal at the time.  I was not able to eat food for days, as I was terrified I wouldn't be able to stop.  I drank my protein, and took my vitamins, but didn't want to eat solid food.  I think the only way I was able to get through it was the fact Christmas was coming up, and I didn't want to disappoint my children and other family members.  I forced myself to keep going.  For good or bad, I was still using the vicodin I had for pain relief.  I spent lots of time listening to soothing music on my ipod, and trying to meditate.  I got through it all, soon stopped the vicodin, but I surely did miss food as a comfort.  The grief is still there for my father, I found myself crying this week just hearing a wren sing, thinking of my dad. In the end, what gets us through painful times like this is inner strength, and the support of loved ones around us.  It takes alot of strength to reach our WLS goal, it shows we have it in us. Hugs to you during this time of loss, Debra M.

Hi Debra, Thank you for sharing with me your painful time with your father.  I am sorry for your loss.  It's always such a painful thing to go through but when it's not expected it's twice as hard. I appreciate your suggestions and will try them.  It is so strange not turning to food, but then there were times when I would reach for the worst.  I know with the help of my OH family then I will be ok. Thank you again.... Take care, Kathy

I feel for you. If youb have ever read my pages you know I REALLY understand what your going thru. I personally turned to Jack Daniels for a while because I didnt know what else to do. I hope you find a healthier solution. Best of Luck Diana

I'm sorry to hear about your trials.  I think normal people turn to friends and, this is the hard part, go to a professional therapist when needed.  They can at least help with alternative coping strategies.  Wishing you better times ahead!