How do you stop bad behaviour?

I realized something tonight....I am back to eating bad stuff because I want to be invisible again....I can't believe this has happened to me.  I have been given a great assigment in work and well its the attention of doing a good job that is annoying my peers which are in turn bothering me.  And me who thinks I can eat away the problem again.  I am so depressed that I am back to a full circle of abusing myself because others make me feel bad about doing good work.  I hate where I am now.  I don't know how to stop this.  Why do I feel being invisible is the only answer?  Why can't I stand up for myself and tell these gals to bug off.  I have tried to ignore them and let me tell you it seems to make them worse.  But each jab at me just makes me feel worse.  I have been thinking of quitting this job just because I hate what is happening to me and my weight is going up.  I need help but not sure what kind of help.  If people don't like you why don't they just leave you alone?  I don't know how to deal and guess I never will. Debbie

Hi honey, It is so hard when you feel like this.  I suggest therapy to learn how to do the things you want to do.  There wil always be people who, for whatever reason, are ticked off by your accomplishments.  You just have to learn how to take care of you and not worry about what others think and say.  I  know this is hard so I would suggest a good therapist and a good support group. Darlene

Seeing therapist but this problem really has not come up until now in my journey...I guess its time to get on it. Thank you for your support! Debbie

I didn't do therapy or support groups until I had gained 60 lbs of the weight back.  I am now doing both and have started to lose again.  5lbs so far.   Darlene

Therapist had some good thoughts and she is right....I should not release my power to these individuals.  I need to focus on me.  Its so hard though.  I guess next week is support group and its time to get active again. Thank you for your support Debbie

Debbie, I competely understand it when you say "if people don't like you why don't they just leave you alone?" I feel the exact same way due to my sil and a few so called "friends". I too eat sometimes when they stress me out and I hate it. I often say to myself "why are you doing this? eating is not going to hurt them~its only hurting me! they could care less if I eat or maybe they will even gain some pleasure b/c of it if they would notice that I maybe gained a few pounds." Anyway, like you I'm working on this in therapy and I hope   it will help! I hope you don't have to give up your new position due to this! Hang in there and let me know how things are going.

I guess I can't live or work in a bubble huh.....Why was it easier when I was heavier?  I feel like I lost my fat and my alligator skin and I just hate it.  I hate that I have been eating soooo much and lots of wrong stuff because of the conflicts.  I have to stop.  Please let tomorrow be a better day. Debbie

Debbie,

You are already on the path to stopping it!!  You recognized IT!  Being aware is the first step to putting a stop to self-destructive behavior.  and seeking help is the second.  Give you self some credit, you are working hard, and making progress.  You will find a way to overcome this thought pattern and work your way through it.

Good Luck to you!

-L.

Thank you for your kind words.  I recognize but can't stop it....I need control.  I hope its on its way soon. Debbie

I know how you feel. Hang in there, pray about it. It will get better!  SW:242 GW:142 CW:140 NGW:135