Five Years - where has the time gone?

Hi all, Yesterday marked the 5 year anniversary of my RNY. It's been an amazing journey with lots of changes - some good and some not so good. I have suffered some backsliding, eating junk food that I know I shouldn't. I know that I have an eating disorder and I have to face life with the knowledge that I am recovering from morbid obesity, not cured. Having said that, life is good. There are so many things that I do now and take for granted that I couldn't begin to do 5 years ago. For instance, I don't have to sit when preparing food; I stand at the kitchen cabinets and cut veggies or whatever like "normal" people do. Seatbelts fit with lots of room to spare. I have a good relationship with the treadmill, exercise bike and eliptical, not to mention the weight machines in my apartment's fitness room. I can take advantage of the annual public transportation pass that my work offers it's employees for $35 - so I don't drive to work most days and park at the very closest parking spot to my office - I take the bus or light rail. Five years ago, I couldn't have gotten up the steps to get on the bus. This list could go forever but I don't have the time to type it all out and I'm sure most of you know the things I'm taling about. On the down side, not everything is as I expected it when I had my RNY. I still have constant, excruciating pain from rheumatoid arthritis and fibromyalgia. I've had both knees replaced and that has helped some but my ankles are going now. I still have to use a cane when walking any distance and am under the care of a pain management doctor. I wear a pain patch at all times and have to supplement it with hydrocodone at least twice a day. I was sure that after losing weight, the pain would be gone - I was wrong. The I just knew that having the joint replacement surgery would do the trick; once again wrong. Unfortunately, the arthritis is attacking all the joints and the fibro takes care of the soft tissue and muscles. But - I don't let it stop me. I refuse to become an invalid after regaining my life. I take my pain meds, use my cane and keep on going. The mental pain from not participating in life is worse than the physical pain. Other than the autoimmune problems, my health is excellent. All my labs are alwyas perfect and I rarely even get a sinus infection any more. Both my surgeon and my PCP are thrilled with the results of my physicals. If I go by the BMI chart, I'm still obese. I had problems with that for a while but I'm coming to accept that I will never get to my "normal" weight. My surgeon didn't expect me to and I didn't think he was right. In fact, I lost more than he wanted me to and then, unfortunatley gained the difference back plus some. I struggle with foods some days; unfortunatly, my mind still thinks that food can ease physical pain - it doesn't; it just causes mental anguish after it's eaten. It's strange that we know intellectually that food can't bring comfort, but still turn to it in times of stress. Do I have any regrets about the last 5 years? Of course. There are things that I should have done differently. I should never have veered off the straigt and narrow that I followed for over two years post-op; never tested the waters but I did and I have to accept that. I can only try to do better and live one day at a time. Would I have the surgery again? In the blink of an eye. WLS is the greatest thing that I could have done for myself. It didn't "cure" my obesity problem but it let me get a handle on it. It didn't take away all my pain but it made me a candidate for knee replacement surgery which has allowed me to walk and exercise. The whole WLS experience has been such a positive - the weight loss, my revived sense of self-worth, and all the wonderful friends I have made along this journey. I thank God each day for leading me to my wonderful Dr. Warnock and giving him the skills to perform this life-changing surgery so successfully. And I also thank God for all the wonderful people who have come into my life as a result of having WLS. Bless you all. Patty

Patty, I do not know what to say to you except "Thank You" for posting. I am 20 months out. I am 61 years old, 5'1", 130 lbs. large frame. I have lost a total of 130 lbs. I am pretty much at goal weight. I know the really hard work lays ahead. I am so afraid of gaining the weight back. I am a compulsive overeater. When I start with sugar, I can not stop. Other things bother me, but sugar is the worse. Thanks again for letting me know there is life after RNY--five years down the road. You are a real encouragement to all of us. Hang in there and God Bless.

THANK YOU , THANK YOU PATTY!! You are definately my HERO!! I am about 3.5 years out and you are oh so right, I still struggle with food and the "BAD" treats. I like you have fell way WAY off the straight and narrow. It is the same deal as before, makes me feel good for a moment but then after that moment is over I have deep regrets that I did it in the first place. I cannot be trusted with sweets and treats, even the healthier versions at times depending on my mood. I am a comfortable 182-186 and yes I am still considered "OBESE". Yea, yea whatever society says, makes me mad some times. I always thought I could be a size 6-7 like some others but I find that mostly like you I have a good relationship with my gym and most of time with food. I know that I am a recovering food addict and constantly struggle to keep it at bay and still trying to keep my addictive behavior from seeping into my other areas, like shopping, drinking and smoking(haven't smoked for over 6 yrs before surgery). I am very happy I have a tummy thats a tool and know that I have you guys here and my support groups to go to in times of need. Its good to hear from those of us who are far out to see how its going, in the back of my mind I am always afraid I am going to be 300+ again. Well you take care and wish you happiness, love and laughter!! Thanks for sharing Kim in Chicago

Kim, Thanks to you for sharing, too. I love to hear from the oldies out there. Like you I will not ever be a 6-7. Sounds like you are doing wonderfully.

Patty, Congratulations on 5 years! I know the road hasn't always been an easy one, but you've come thru it a winner BIG TIME!!!! Tracy B

Happy Anniversary Patty, it's great hearing from the longer-term post-ops. What an encouraging and real post, I too am a food addict and have to watch myself daily or I can definitely see myself slide into no where land. Wishing you continued success! Dana

Hey girlfriend, happy surgiversary!!! It's good to see you posting. Hope you are staying warm.......brrrrrrr...... Hugs, Connie

Happy WLS-iversary Patty!! You were an inspiration to me starting out over 3-1/2 years ago, And still are As you push on playing and winning with the cards as they are dealt! You're a Champ!!! Best Wishes- Dx

Hi Patty! You are an inspiration. Pain is very difficult to manage post-op, but you have always been positive about it. So many people learn from your posts and I am so glad to see you again. I have been wondering how life has been for you. It is enlightening to see that you are surviving and living life, feeling blessed even though your road is tough. You make me smile and I hope more of the oldies see your post. HUGS. Christina

Patty-I am very happy to see that you are well. I have been wondering how you were doing. You have been such an inspiration with your great attitude and your soapboxes--lol. Thanks very much for stopping by and updating us.