I really need a butt kicking....please

Hi all, I haven't been on for a while because I have been grazing and doing so awful. I don't know what my problem is. I am hating myself. I know all the things I am doing are wrong but I'm doing it anyway. I am munching on Halloween candy and grazing throughout the day....because of this, my blood sugars keep dropping out and I eat again and again. I am able to eat a whole sandwich and have been drinking way too much pop. I have been out for almost five years now. I still weigh 219. This is up 20 pounds over the past couple months. I have cancelled my doc appointment because I feel like such a failure. I do get all my protein in and take my vitamins. Please help me out of this slump. Shelly

Shelly, Don't feel like a failure. We all do things like this sometimes. We do need to remind ourselves that we are important to us. I would suggest that you call get another Dr appt and get back on the program. Sure he will be concerned about gain but he can give you insight of how to manage this so you don't keep going in that direction. Keep a food diary of the current eating habits so you can discuss it properly. I know that we tend to ignore things we don't like....understand that the weight gain may be unpleasant but its a learning experience for us! We need to learn and acknowledge. I think that is where we fall down in life. Acknowledge, then make a plan on how to get back on track....Using subject matter experts to get you back on track. Subject matter experts in this area of our life would be Dr, nutrionist, Gym trainer, counseling, and our food diaries. Keep open and listen....they will give you the way to get back on track. Hugs and Fleece Blankets Debbie

Great advice Debbie! I agree, don't feel like a failure. You're here acknowleding that there's a problem and trying to figure out a way to fix it~that's progress! You already said exactly what the issues are~grazing, sugar, etc. It sounds like things have gotten a bit out of control, but you can regain control over your eating. Use any and all resources you have~dr, surgeon, nutritionist, counselor, your friends here at OH, etc. You can do this Shelly! Good Luck to You!!!!!!!!! Tracy B

I'm only a year out, but am in a similar boat. I call it the "calorie creep" - you eat a little more one day, then a little more than that the next day, then you start eating more carbs, then you start eating more snacks, and before you know it you're eating 2,000 calories a day. And although I haven't gained any weight back yet, I also haven't lost anything in about 6-8 weeks. So I'm trying a couple things. First, I still keep track of what I eat every day and I weigh myself every morning. Tracking my food (calories, protein, fat, carbs, etc.) and exercise helps me see how my food intake affects my weight over time. For me, if I wanted to stay at 230 pounds, I could eat around 2,000 calories per day. But I want to get to 165-175 pounds, so I need to cut out some calories. Second, I'm going to try eating 5 small meals (200 calories average for each mini-meal) throughout the day, then eating about 300-400 calories at dinner, with most of the dinner calories coming from protein. I tend to eat more when I allow myself to get over-hungry, so I'm hoping that eating 5 small meals will keep both my real hunger and my head hunger in check. Some of my mini-meals are things like: * small Wendy's chili * Campbell's Healthy Request soups (check protein, carbs, fats, etc.) * apple or pear w/ 1-2 pieces of string cheese * 2 hard-boiled eggs * venti non-fat latte from Starbucks * 1 cup low-fat cottage cheese w/ splenda and 2 tbsp. sugarfree jam * 8 oz. low-sugar yogurt with flaxseed meal * 3-4 slices low-fat turkey w/ 1 oz. low-fat cheese * lean cuisine frozen dinner (sometimes closer to 250 calories) * baked/roasted chicken breast w/ salad or steamed veggies * 1 ounce roasted almonds or walnuts (satisfies need for something salty & crunchy) Anyway, I hope this is helpful to you. Good luck getting things under control; amazing how easy it is to slip back into old habits, isn't it? I keep reminding myself that I didn't go through a major surgery and a year of hard work to let it slip now. May we both find the strength and willpower to steer our boats back on course. Kellie Lap RNY 10/25/2005 396/230/165?

Shelly, Don't beat yourself too badly, what's done is done. You still have "the tool" and the knowledge to use it. I agree with Debbie, go ahead and make your Dr. appt. Your Dr. and dietician can help you get back on track. Pre-op, my surgeon was very honest about the 2 main reasons for regain, grazing, and liquid calories, with, and between meals, so you're not alone. You're not a failure, you just got off track. Good luck, Doug

Hey all, I really appreciate all the response and the time you have taken to help me. I made my appointment for a month so I can feel good about myself and give myself a chance to get back on track, food diary, etc. I need to deal with head hunger. I tend to want to graze something awful and this is where I'm throwing my blood sugar levels off. The only way I can control this is through drinking, exercise..Anyone have head hunger issues. Thanks for the great meal ideas. I know that once I get through two good days, I'll feel better and get back on track. I have to do this. Shelly

Oh Yea! I deal with head hunger and I'm an emotional eater~its so hard some days! Especially with the kids candy around right now. Its so easy to think that just one little piece won't hurt. Tracy B

Just wanted to tell you that I look at your before and after pictures for encouragement - You look wonderful - Thanks for all the support you give on here too - DeAnna

20 pounds is not a ton but it is enough...get control while you can IF you can. I an still over 200 too and trying ever so hard to get to 180. I think we can both do it if we do what we know we are suppose to....I will try harder if you will!!! Diana

Shelly: I am so where you are right now, and kicking myself for my lack of control. I'm so addicted to sweets, and pretty sure I'm grazing too much, too. I was never a good exerciser, but started at Curves about a month and a half ago. I guess it's a real good thing I did, because since joining there, I've gained weight rather than lost. I would hate to see what might have happened if I weren't exercising! I had stayed around 165 for a real long time, and it was pretty easy at first. Then I jumped up to about 172-175 last winter, but I allowed myself to attribute that to being on vacation. Now, at a little over 3 years out, I have again jumped up in weight, and am struggling to stay below 190. I am very upset with myself and I know what I should be doing, but feel powerless to do it. I do agree with all of the advice you received here. Except, I usually don't feel all that much support from my doctor's office. She is a great surgeon, and they have a lot of stuff "written" down for us that is great reading, but to get actual verbal supportiveness, that is a different story. All she usually says is what I need to do - duh! Like I don't already know that. I, too am very good about making sure I get enough protein, and I am religious about taking my vitamins. My lab work has been stellar, so health-wise I'm in a much better place and feeling well enough. I just wish I could apply some discipline to my eating habits - something I've not been very good at throughout the years. Best wishes to you - I hope you will post again, and perhaps compare notes on how we are doing. I am not giving up, because I know what will happen if I do. I really don't want to return to 270 pounds. Carlita