When can a WLSer be considered a "graduate"?

I'm very confused. I had my surgery in January 2006. I've lost 105#s since then, a total of 145#s since I began this journey. I have a BMI of 32, which makes me still obese, yet I'm the smallest I've ever been in my adult life. I'm emotionally uncomfortable being this small, at least so far. Do I wait to get used to it? Do I continue to get smaller despite my discomfort? When is it "enough" and how will I know? What is "goal" anyway? When is graduation day? And what do I do then? RobinNJ

I think when you are at least 2 years out. Mentally it's hard but you HAVE to be ready. You may want to get couseling. I know I had trouble excepting the fact that I didn't make it to my personal goal of 150 and mentally felt like a failure. The more I felt like that the more I ate. Now I'm getting my life back and going to make my goal. I will get to 150 with control. I finally started talking to some of my friends and dealing with some issues and decided i needed to keep going and do this for me. Good luck and you are doing great!! You are shedding your protection and you are opening yourself up to a whole new world. When your body thinks it's enough you will stop. Also, after 6 months to a year you start being able to eat more and that is where I made my mistake and started going with what my head wanted to eat not my stomach and didn't get below 206 until now. DON"T go off track and stay true to yourself. Your mind will catch up with your body. Brigitte

My understand is that the Grads board is for those who are 1 year post-op or more. It has nothing to do with reaching goal. Kathy

Hi Robin! You become a "grad" at 1yr post op. I understand what you mean about being uncomfortable with your new self. I am 19mths post op and my head hasn't caught up with my body. Some days I still feel HUGE even though I know that's not true. What does your discomfort stem from? Is it the new/different attention from the opposite sex? Is it not knowing what clothes to buy? Is it losing that "insulation" to the world??? I can't say when enough is enough for you~only you can be the judge of that. I wanted to have a normal BMI and worked toward that goal. I did also ask my surgeon what he thought my goal weight should be~he came up with 165lbs, but my personal goal was 150lbs and I've been at my goal weight for several months now. Well, Congratuations to you! Sounds like you're doing a fantastic job! Tracy B 328/150 5'9"

I don't think we've ever thrown anybody out of the room so pull up a chair and welcome to the group. Most grads join in about year out from surgery, but if you're approaching goal at 9 months it's probably time to join the grads board. Some topics will interest you and others won't. We talk a lot about regain which probably won't be a problem for you over the next few months. Dealing with the emotional side of weight loss is discussed often on the boad. Personally I think your surgeon and PCP should be the deciding factor for when enough is enough. As obese people who lose weight we often don't see ourselves realistically after we lose the weight. Friends/family aren't dependable because they see the huge weight loss and think we're getting too skinny (or maybe they're jealous that we're now smaller than them or getting close to their size). Yep I'd say the doctors are the most dependable at this stage of your weight loss. Many of us have to settle on being larger than we'd like when the weight loss stops, others like you just aren't sure where to stop the loss. Either way time seems to help us settle into our final weight. Best wishes for your continued success.