all by myself?!

I'm really frustrated with myself tonight. I have been real excited about joining the Fitness Center at the local hospital and working on toning. But tonight when I went... I just couldn't get myself to stay and complete the whole workout!!! I start to look around and feel out of place and freaked out. I only lasted 20 minutes. Now the thing about this Fitness Center is that its SMALL, the town only has roughly 4000 people... maybe. It is not like Bally's or one of the other chain workout places where I often wonder if people are there just to get a date. I do tons of stuff by myself... I go to the movies by myself; I've traveled to other cities and taken tours by myself or with a group of people that I don't know; eaten out by myself, I've gone to Broadway musicals and shows in downtown Minneapolis, by MYSELF, I've spent the day at Silver Dollar City in Branson, twice, BY MYSELF... but for some darn reason I can't make myself stay and workout at a small, rinky dink Fitness Center!!! I don't really expect anyone to answer this post, I just really needed to vent. Thanks Tracy A.

Hi Tracy A~Its Tracy B, LOL! I can understand how you feel. I don't work out in a club anymore~I enjoy doing my 5mile walk away the pounds dvd at home b/c that's where I'm comfortable working out. I HATE feeling like people are looking at me (even though they really don't care a wink about me). When I was in my 20's I always worked out at a gym, but it was more for show or to get a date I guess, LOL. So, I guess you need to decide what will work best for you! I think it's great to work out in a gym if you're comfortable there. How long have you been working out there? Is it fairly new for you? Try not to be too hard on yourself~maybe you were just having an off night. You seem like a pretty down to earth person so I'm sure once you get into the swing of things it will go much better! Vent away any time! Tracy B 328/152 5'9"

Hi Tracy B. I used to work out at this Center prior to WLS, but all I did was the treadmill. Weird thing is I didn't feel as uncomfortable at 320+ lbs, as I did today at 164. I think what I will try tomorrow is going later in the evening... maybe the 5:30 crowd isn't the right one for me. I know that people could care less that I'm there and don't even give me a second thought... but in my mind everyone is watching me. Gosh I sound paranoid. I guess I should give myself credit for going and lasting 20 minutes... and you're right... once I get into the swing of things I'm sure it will go better. Thanks!!! Tracy A.

Hi DeeDee, I love my iPod!!! I did take it with me, but you know I was so out of sorts I couldn't even tell you what I was listening to. Oh well... I think tomorrow will be better. No wait, I KNOW it will be better... got'a think positive!! Thanks!! Tracy A.

Hi Tracy, I am lucky to have a gym at work. Unfortunately I felt the same way as you the first few times I used it. I was freaked out what people who knew me would be saying. Finally I just put on my Ipod and ignored everything but breathing. Every once in a while a start to freak- but force myself to go back to listening to the music and taking deep breaths. I actually use the elliptical a lot and will close my eyes. It must look freaky- but I am working out all the time now. good luck- donna

Donna, I like the closing the eyes idea. I might just try that tonight. Thanks!! Tracy A.

I know that feeling! I've been working out at a gym for 2 years -- but usually with a group or at least with the trainer. I never feel uncomfortable with them. But when I'm there by myself, I'm self-conscious. It's really strange what our minds can do to us. Just keep going! I do! I figure if I'm there by myself enough, I'll get over it. Good luck! Deb

Thanks Deb, I agree, if I just keep going it will get easier and easier. The mind can really play tricks on ya when you least expect it. On one hand I was/am really excited to join the Fitness Center but then when I get there and start working out I become a self-conscious goof ball. Tracy A.

You know, I was uncomfortable at first and thought everyone was staring at me. So I watched them for a little while and realized they were focused on their own program and never even noticed me. Just don't sit under the clock or you'll think everyone will be looking at you when they are really wondering what time it is, lol. I have some Donna Summers music on my ipod, get on the elliptica, close my eyes and work out! Anyway, just tell yourself that you are going no matter what and soon the uncomfortable feeling will go away. Linda