I'm in a very Dark Place

I am now 6 years and 2 months out of surgery. Unfortunately my doctor retired like 6 months after surgery and I have never had any followup care. I know it's bad on my part too. About 3 years ago I was involved in an automobile accident and have injury to my back. I was also diagnosed with epstein barr (chronic fatigue) and fibromyalgia (a severe muscle nerve disorder). Since the accident I have been unable to exercise properly. It hurts to move for more than 5 minutes. Just to walk down my driveway to get the mail is a task. I have noticed old habits coming back. Not like eating sweets and stuff because they still make me uncomfortable but like the whole idea of not exercising and eating some things I shouldn't. I have gained back a significant amount of weight. I am so scared. I don't know where to turn to. I don't want to be that way again. I am currently doing weigh****chers with my husband to help maintain my weight and lose what i can. I have no self discipline. I still have a rather loose apron but don't know what road I should go down. Should I attempt to see another surgeon or should I move on to the next phase and look into reconstructive surgery. I am hoping that if I have surgeries like a tummy tuck and breast reduction I will be able to exercise a little more because I won't have such a pull on my back from my stomach or breast. I am so lost someone please help.

I am sorry to here you are going thru this. Have you had your Blood work checked? Most plastic sugeons do a free consultation so that wouldn't hurt. How is your vitamin intake?

I have a suggestion for the exercise part, although I have not yet tried the DVD. I just ordered Chicometrics (www.chicometrics.com). It is supposed to be very good for WLS people and people with other problems that cause them to not be able to exercise aerobically. It is either done sitting in a chair or on the floor. It is not high impact cardio or anything. It was suggested on this site so I went to their website and decided to order it. Take a look and see what you think. I gave up on Taebo because of the excess flapping skin. How far are you from your goal? It can't hurt to have a consult. Sounds like you need to find your path again though and get some weight back off first. I also just ordered some books last night, another suggestion from many previous posts on this site, that are supposed to help with emotional eating. "How Much Does Your Soul Weigh?" by Dorrie McCubbrey and "Life Is Hard, Food Is Easy" by Linda Spangle. Good luck and I hope you can find your way again!

Hi Amanda. You can get out of the dark place! Here's my advice: 1. Visit an Internal Medicine doctor and get your lab values checked to make sure you are not deficient in anything 2. Start taking vitamins and calcium religiously 3. Go back to the basics, protein, water and limit your carbs 4. Walking to your mailbox is good exercise, keep doing it You can do this! Good Luck! Cathy

All good advice. I am currently reading the South Beach Diet book. For whatever reason (maybe just the name of it), I thought it was a 'fad' diet. But it seems it was written by a cardiologist. He says you can lose weight on his program whether you exercise or not. Of course he says that exercise is good and will speed things up....but for some of his cardio patients, exercise is not an option. Don't count on reconstructive surgery to get you anywhere. It will make you look better, but its not about weight loss....its about looking better and feeling better about yourself. And I imagine most surgeons will want you closer to goal weight before they do it. I know mine does. This is a good place to be for support. Keep coming here and posting. There are so many who are willing to help and will help. But the ultimate help is YOU. I wish you luck..... Motivation and determination are yours for the asking. Hugs Charlie

I have fibromyalgia and osteoarthritis. I do water aerobics and it really helps the fibro. You might want to check it out. Also, find an internist or WLS surgeon who will do your follow up. You are playing with fire by not getting your lab tests done regularly.

I agree with Charlie's post. The SOUTH BEACH DIET is very doable, very, and something you can live with. My 2 cents worth here is this: As a general rule I do one or two protein drinks daily, EVERY DAY of the week. Usually do a breakfast because I am busy with work and I drink my protein as I down my daily vitamins and pills, followed by a cup of coffee with creamer and artificial sweetner, followed by water water and more water until lunch, which is usually a salad with vinegar and oil and a piece of chicken, cottage cheese or lean frozen meal and fruit. This is just a sample, but if you have the protein drinks in place of a meal or two, it will kick start your weight loss and when you see a little come off it will give you motivation to do more. My daughter suffers from fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue syndrome and manages all of it with a good diet, maybe it will work for you too. Good luck. Hugs, Missy ( a few days shy of 3 years out, at goal and lowest ever for one year and holding steady, working at it of course).

Wow you are going through a lot. I am 4 1/2 years out, an RN and am now a personal trainer. I own a fitness studio. Exercise will really help you. I have a client who has fibromyalgia. She is 45, was about 65# overweight when she was refered to me and had constant pain for eyars. That was 2 months ago. She met with my dietician and was put on a South Beach Diet style diet. (SHe is not a WLS patient) She started training with me 3 days a week. At 1st she couldn't do 10 minutes on the treadmill. Two months later, she trains 3 hrs a week and does an amazing 45 minutes to 1 hr on a rowing machine every day but Sunday, including training days. She lifts weights, does resistance work and works her butt off. Literally. She has dropped 18#, went from an 18 to a 14 and feels like a different person. She ahs a way to go but is amazing. We started out VERY slowly, and she has done well. She went on Neurontin, which has helped her pain significantly. She is also on Provigil for severe fatigue and it has worked beautifully. Please find a fitness coach who understands you...and no excuses. Nutrition has to be your priority. Get at least 2-3 opinions on any more surgery, especially PS. Wish you all the best, Diane

Hi, I don't have any knowledge of the WLS stuff as I am still looking into it, but I do know about the breast reduction. I had mine done in Dec 05 and it is the best thing I have ever done. I am very overweight and my thought was that even if I never loose the weight I still want to be comfortable. I went from a DDD to a small C and couldn't be happier. It is such a huge relief to exercise easier, not be in constant pain, wear wireless bras( if I wear one at all). Good luck with everything, Chrissy