3 Years Out & Struggling!

I can identify so much with what have written. I had WLS about 18 months ago - lost 100 lbs. Feel & look the best I have in years - in many ways BUT these cravings are making me crazy. I've not gained back yet but scared too death I will. I agree with you - our surgeons don't prepare us for this. Maybe they can't. I don't think anyone that hasn't walked in our shoes can understand. I can't concentrate on my work or anything else until I get something to eat. Sometimes I think they're worse now than they were before. I can't believe it is all in our minds. There has to be something clemically going on too. Thanks for sharing your story. There are many recovering alcoholics so I maybe we can indeed find a recovery too. Carol

Betsy: You are definitely not alone. Count me in with the strugglers!!! I'll be 3 years out in September, and it's a daily battle between me, my hunger, my cravings, my fears, my hatred of exercise. It's really no different from pre-surgery days. The only difference is now I have lost a significant amount of weight due to WLS, something I never accomplished "on my own." I only had a brief period of time when I didn't experience true hunger or cravings (about 4-5 months following surgery). I lost 110 pounds, down to 160, and have regained to about 181 (as of this morning). I'm trying very hard to not gain any more, and would dearly love to get back to about 170. I do eat compulsively due to emotions and especially stress on my job (it's pretty bad right now). I know that I don't always make the best choices, but I also can't seem to control that either (definitely addictive-type behavior). I don't believe there are any magic solutions, just take it day-by-day and try to do the best that we can. I have recently been considering getting some "help" by way of therapy or counseling, so I may start looking for the appropriate therapist. Believe me, though, I know that will not be the sole answer! Thanks for your post. Carlita

Carlita - I have spent the last few days trying to get my head straight on this issue, and reading all the posts I can on several different WLS message boards. I know what I have to do, and it involves eating mostly (or at least 50% each meal) protein, then veggies/some fruit, sticking with lower glycemic index foods, snacking (if necessary) on only protein foods, upping my water intake, and trying to increase my exercise, adding strength training. I did pretty well yesterday and had only one blow-out. So far today has been better. I go to my eating disorder therapist tonight so that should help some too. And my WLS support group met last night and the subject was mindful eating. I found hearing the information again (for the zillionth time) was helpful. Everyone keeps saying once I get started, each day will get easier. I certainly hope so. Betsy

Betsy, I am a 2-year post-op. No judgment here; I'm in the same boat. I am really struggling to control my compulsive overeating behavior. I noticed a few months ago that it was really getting out of control again. Many of my old pre-op favorites still make me ill if I eat them to excess **** cream, candy, loads of creamy pasta, etc) ... but I can eat chips & crackers and they feel sooooo good going down. A few months ago, I was eating 2 boxes of Archer Farms asiago-cheddar crackers per day. Like you, I've seen an eating disorder specialist. I had to find what works for me, which turns out is a lot of exercise. I'm training myself to become an endurance runner, slowly ... slowly. I started out not being able to power walk more than a mile at a time; now I can jog nearly 2 miles without a break. I spend my daily lunch hour jogging, and then another 25 minutes on my treadmill each night. I'm still nowhere close to where I'd like to be, but I'm finding that each day of progress makes me happier & a bit more at peace with myself. I started this just hoping that increased activity would allow me the freedom to eat more than I should ... but I found that when I am active, I don't want to put junk into my body. Also, I've lost 18 pounds in the past 2 months & am down to an all-time low of 143. Actually, I liked my curves at 150 - the weight loss wasn't intentional, but I'm not complaining. I can't pretend that I still don't have overwhelming urges to overeat; it's just that I've worked at identifying my triggers, and then redirecting those negative emotions in a healthier activity. When I really crave something, I allow myself that treat. I just try very hard not to give in when I *know* that my compulsion to overeat is due to an emotional issue .... and I know that it is when I'm more concerned with eating in bulk (boxes of crackers) rather than something specific that we'd all enjoy (a small cupcake or a few ounces of dark chocolate). Jogging really works for me. The endorphin rush is great .... there is nothing like jamming to my favorite tunes while the wind whips through my hair, I'm on a scenic path, I don't have to think about anything at all ... just focus on my breathing, and the movement of my body. Find what works for you. I wish you the best of luck.

Wow, What a blessing it is to hear that I am not alone! I have been super depressed since I have gained about 25-30lbs. I thought maybe it is possible to have the surgery done over? Or i wanted to look into liposuction or plastic surgery anything. I can't believe i cant wear the clothes i wore last summer! I refuse to buy more clothes especially since i have to go back UP in sizes!! I feel ashamed and embarressed and need a solution quick. I exercise and have started waztching what i eat but nothing changes!! I joined a 90 day fitness challenge and even they were shocked to see i didnt lose NOTHING! What am I going to do? Anyone have any luck losing after regaining?? Jennifer

ME TOO.

Betsy, YOur story is the same as mine, I also went to see an eating disorder specialist, and like you said doesn't specialize in WLS patients. I'm very scared, I started having anxiety attacks about 1 year ago which sort of spurred the weight gain, or it could be a coincidence, (I don't know). I also can't fit into most of last years clothes. I'm curious are you being treated with any medication and do you think it's working? Best Wishes Amy

I am not being treated with any meds, but I have thought about it. I'm working my way through a reading list from my therapist - Fighting Fat After 40, The Rules of Normal Eating, Desperately Seeking Self, Eating Mindfully - they all give great insight and advice/suggestions, however I need to follow the advice the books give, which is easier said than done. But I will keep working at it. Betsy