Grads - I need you.

Hi Michelle with 2 L's Sorry its taken me so long to reply, I just had to take a few steps back and regroup. Thanks for sharing your experience, it is very much appreciated Michele with one L

I'm 5 years out and haven't had a weight gain. I follow the rules my surgeon put down for me as far as portions and daily caloric intake and I still follow that. I exercise and drink lots of water. I don't get hungry feeling so I eat by the clock and I still have the restriction feeling so I don't overeat. I pick protein forward meals and I make sure to take my supplements. Not everybody regains. I belong to a local support group where many of the post ops, some less, some farther out than I am have not regained.The ones that haven't are the ones that don't give into temptation, they keep up on their exercise and use portion control. Don't freak out about gaining somewhere down the road - if you do you can take it off, and much easier than before. It's not the end of the world if you put on 5 pounds, because with this tool in place we can take off the weight we regain if we need to. Just going back to basics can do the trick.

Thanks for the calming words Myrtle, I needed them! Michele

I'll be 4 years in about 9 or so weeks - no regain (ok a silly lil 10 pounder I dealt with RAPIDLY), but nothing that hung around or was what I could call significant ((((HUGS))))

Thanks Tooter, my very own adopted Jewish Momma =) *hugs* -me

Hey Michele! Here's part of my story -warning - it's a LONG one! I'm 4 years 9 months post--- 289 on 9/6/01 - now 159 (at goal) and holding for over 3 years... I remember during the rapid loss phase I went through so much mental "stuff" (hold on - it gets WEIRD! ) My personal major goals were: (starting 289) 249......then 229.......then 199 -----WOO HOO this one was HUGE!!!......then 189..... Then mentally something shifted & my GOAL went to "sizes"... Size 14....... Size 12 then...........JUNIOR SIZE 11!!! SINGLE DIGITS!!! GOTTA HIT SINGLE DIGITS!!! I'VE NEVER BEEN SINGLE DIGITS!!! (I teased for YEARS that I was BORN a size 16!) ........then Size 9 then............JUNIOR SIZE 9!!! then...Size 4/6 then.........JUNIOR size 2/4 !!! At 47, 5' 7" tall & 137 lb I looked EMACIATED! BONY! HORRIBLE!! But "dang it" I was in a Small size 2/4!!!! STOP THE MADNESS!!! My PCP nurse practitioner kindly mentioned one day that I was probably carrying 10-12 lb of excess skin and that at 137 lb my body was really probably at around 125. 125. She told me it looked like I was heading to "unhealthy" and did I really want to end up there? I hid my extra skin well. I also hadn't learned to "see through" it to my "real body size" when I looked in the mirror at a size 2/4 I "saw" all the loose skin, not the actual BODY size... make sense? Something in me shifted mentally and I worked to SHIFT my FOCUS when I looked in the mirror. To look at my BODY not the SKIN. And I relaxed. It took about a year of making myself CHOOSE to eat AS MUCH as I was SUPPOSED to. I also upped my carbs & drank with my meals to allow me to get more in (turned my meals to soup)... I ate TOO WELL. Got really GOOD at it! Gained back up to 172!!! STOP THE MADNESS!! Refocused. Made some adjustments: no drinking w/ meals and made myself aware of snacking on nuts & wheat thins... cut back a bit. Also learned- truly learned (HEART knowledge not just HEAD knowledge): the JOY is in the JOURNEY not merely the DESTINATION... Back to 159 (IDEAL WEIGHT) and so happy to LIVE HERE for over 2.5 years... For the first time in my life I'm looking back at 4.9 years of : "I worked the tool" I "UN-worked the tool" and I "re-worked" the tool. Michele, the issue is I WORKED (as YOU WORK) and took CONTROL of my "eating life" for the first time ever! Times I "emotionally eat" -- I make adjustments & I'm okay. Times I "socially eat" -- I make adjustments & I'm okay. Hmmm... sounds like "normal" eating for "normal weighted" people to me. That in itself is miraculous. Now at this point in the journey LIFE is the issue - not food/body issues... just doing life... Enjoy the JOURNEY Michele. You are WORKING THE TOOL. You already ARE in control. You ALREADY are. You've come to a place that you've longed to be. Look past the skin. I challenge you to begin to become a CHEERLEADER for your body for yourself. You're amazing & you ALREADY are succeeding! WOO HOO for you, Michele! Now take a nap! (sounds good to me!) hee hee

Judy, thank you so much for posting this!Your words have helped me immensely!!!!! Michelle, just wanted you to know that I understand exactly how you're feeling!!! I'm in the same place as you right now and considering seeking some help. we need to be able to truly enjoy this new lease on life we've been giving, but I haven't been able to do that~YET! I'm working on it, just like you. Good Luck to You! Tracy B 328/154 5'9"

Hi Tracy, I'm sorry to hear you are in a similiar place. Have you decided whether or not to seek counseling? I know I need to go back, but I'm having trouble finding a new therapist. I had to fire the last one, we just didn't hit it off well. (She wanted to use hypnotherapy, and I definitely did not.) LOL Hope you are in a calmer place than me =) Michele

Thank you so much for writing Judy! You are right, I AM succeeding. Now if I could just figure out how to just "live" and enjoy the new me. I'm trying! (sometimes I'm very trying, hehe) Michele

Hi Judy! I just read your response to Michele's post and felt compelled to write to you. Your post could have been written by me! We have had very similar journeys. I started out at 298 and 5'7" and got down to 132. I was wearing a size 2/4 also, and I had MAJOR body dismorphia issues. Everyone kept telling me how emaciated I was, but all I saw was the hanging skin, which I perceived as FAT. Then my father became seriously ill and eventually died. I stopped exercising and began to use food as a coping mechanism again. I gained weight, but figured "so what, eveyone thought I was too thin anyway". Now I've gained all the way up to 171 pounds, and I'm trying to find my way back to my original goal of 145 again. I think that I truly felt and looked my best at that weight. I totally agree with what you said about working and reworking our "tool". I'm currently in the process of trying to regain control over my emotional eating and eat healthfully again. I know that I need to get back to exercising again too. This truly is a lifelong journey. We don't just arrive at our goal weight say "okay, this is the way it's going to be forever". It is an ever-changing process depending on many internal and external factors. Thanks for this great post! Lelina 298/132/171/145 (hopefully some day again)