Hello

Hi, My name is Roxanne and I live in the Tacoma, WA area. I have been working on goals and things since Feb 2 and today I set my surgery date for April 5, 2006. I must say up until today, I have been pretty confident and ready for the change. I keep saying "Bring it on". Today, I am more nervous, scared and wondering if I am doing the right thing. I am 17 pounds down from Feb 2, appointment. I am walking daily on a treadmill at home 1 - 1.5 miles. I am preparing my meal plans to be around 250 calories each meal with protien at each setting. I am sipping my water and drinking no soda or caffiene. I just purchased new pants down 2 sizes so far. I need to get my digital camera up and running so I can post a picture. I hope this site can help me, I have been reading posts and profiles trying to gain as much information as I can. I also log on to bariatriceating.com too. It is nice to talk about this stuff, I have plenty of support around me, it just seems things started happening pretty quickly! Thanks for listening. Roxanne

Hi Roxanne, I have heard more people say the same things that you are saying about 2 to 3 weeks prior to their surgery dates. It is something I think comparable to pre-wedding jitters and things like that. It is a life changing event. Don't worry you will overcome those fears and be on your way soon. I think that you have done great to have lost 17 lbs so far, just a little jump start and you have prepared your self to be on the losing side of life. I myself did not have any second thoughts, until the night before, and I believe the only reason I was having them was because I have 2 young boys that need me, and that is why I chose to go on. I am not saying that you should just go on and have the surgery, but I am saying that everyone feels this way at some point. You know what is best for you. For me the choice was so clear, there was no turning back. You will know, you may be scared, but you will know what is right. Man, If we could just put our feelings aside for a couple of days once in awhile, wouldn't that be nice. Don't worry, it will all work out. I will be thinking of you. Let us know how you are doing, Molly

Hi Roxanne! You are absolutely NORMAL to feel this way. We all do at some point in our journey. For me it was the week before. I kept thinking, "will this be the last time I do this, or that". And of course thinking about my kids. I have two teenagers. I kept thinking, "what will they do without a mom?" But ya know what? I knew that if I didn't have the surgery, I was headed for an early grave from being obese. I was starting to have a whole myriad of issues. My knees were going, my back was constantly hurting, my blood pressure was high enough for medication, etc.... I knew that I couldn't live like that any longer. I knew that I wasn't being a good parent or a good spouse when it was a chore for me to just get up off the couch. I never wanted to do anything that involved physical activity. I hated to go out in public where I might run into someone I knew. I was becoming a depressed hermit. A prisoner in my own body. I hated everything about me. This surgery is a life changing event. Your whole entire outlook on life will change. You WILL enjoy life again! I love my new self! I am the same old Lori in some ways, but a whole different person in others! I am a better mom, a better wife, a better friend! I talk to perfect strangers. I look people in the eye when I speak to them. I am not afraid to be myself anymore. I feel GREAT! My blood pressure is normal. My weight is getting to be in a more normal range. My knees don't hurt. My back feels sooooo much better! I sleep better now, no more CPAP! My energy level is through the roof! I couldn't imagine my life the way it used to be. I look at old pictures and see someone who might have looked happy on the outside but was crying on the inside. I can see it on my face even though others can't. I don't EVER want to become that person again. I hope that I have made you feel a little better about having the surgery. The choice is yours. You have to believe that this is the right choice for you. I had people trying to talk me out of it but I just told them, this is MY decision. I feel GOOD about MY decision. You can either support me or keep your mouth shut and disagree. I wish you luck in the next few weeks! You know that we are always here for you. FOR ANY REASON!!! Keep us posted on your progress! Lori 281/196/140

Thanks for the response, I am definitely going through with the surgery. I am just burning nervous energy! I knew the day I went to the seminar that I would be having this surgery come hell or high water! I am a therapuetic foster parent (3 teenage boys) and work full time outside my home as a warehouse manager. I have a very busy life. I also get home in the evening and don't want to move. Just since I have started my vitmins and exercising and eating better, I feel more alive. I can't imagine how I will feel when I actually lose larger amounts of weight. I appreciate being able to talk to other people who are in the same situation and can ease my fears. Thanks again for listening and responding! Roxanne

Lori- Thanks for the support, I think you told my story in a nut shell. I have diabetes, sleep apena, highblood pressure, bad knees and back and depression with anxiety to go along with it all! I have no biological children, my partner and I provide foster care and these kids need me. I guess it is double edged sword, they need me to do it and if something happens it will be devastating to them. I do appreciate talking and I hopefully will be able to liven this place up too! Thanks, Roxanne

You are most welcome! You have a really great attitude! And keep exercising! It will only help you along your journey! I never thought I would become a pusher...AN EXERCISE PUSHER THAT IS!!!! Lori

I know what you mean, I have motivated a couple of people at home and here at work. Exercise is a great stress reliever. Rox