Taken out of context?

I think maybe my frusteration was taken out of context. I never once claimed to dislike anyone of you peoples individually, and actually I am quite happy with the friends I have made on this board. I am overall frusterated with the negativity pointed toward Dr. Weber- not any one of you in particular. I guess it would be like you having a problem with a co-worker, instead of you going directly to others around you and talking to them about the troubles- wouldn't you be much more successful in going directly to the source of the problem and dealing with it. I am meerly suggesting that you take the trouble you are having with Dr. Weber's staff to him and find a solution to all of this....people don't deserve to be treated in the ways that some of his staff has treated, but I don't think that Dr. W would be the one to aim at when talking about it on the boards...Wouldn't it be his staff? They are the ones who don't go get him when you call.....they are the ones who say they will talk with the Dr. and call back....I wish you all didn't take this in the manner it was taken....I am just frusterated with the negativity from the boards. I hardly post anymore because it seems it's all negative anymore. Yes there are some happy moments, but lately it seems so low. I feel like everyone is pretty much saying...they were happier when they were bigger and they want to reverse everything.....no, nobody said it but with all the negativity it seems like it....these boards use to be so happy. We all use to anticipate eachothers posts. Everyone was greeted with a happy hello, now people come to the boards they are welcomed and then they read about the negative side of it all....I understand that people need to share the good and the bad, but there doesn't seem to be enough good in peoples posts anymore to even it all out. -I came to this site so much as a pre-op, I really relied on it more than I should have....But if I were still pre-op I think it would scare the you know what out of me and I would have probably backed out.... the things I loved to see posted were progress, how happy people were, and what people were eating and doing for their work out. Does this make any sense to anyone or am I still people up? Does anyone get what I am saying? I realize I may have said some things to really **** some people off and that was completely out of frusteration and I apologize for that, but I hope someone can see some insite on what I am saying.

I'm looking over the last two pages of posts and I'm just not seeing the negativity you are talking about... ** There are several questions about specific information, all politely answered. Our group even kindly sidestepped a possible debate on the "best surgery" -- a proud moment! ** There are wonderful updates on people, pictures and status with encouraging responses and praises. ** There are reminders for support groups. ** There are fun discussions about food and daily intake. ** There are introductions and greetings of welcome. ** There are pleas for encouragement with replies of hugs, well wishes and prayers. ** There are announcements of birthdays and surgeries - both intended for well-wishing. Now, those posts were all *before* Derek's post and your comments. Derek's post and your reply are possible the most negativity we have had on this board. Where is the negativity you speak of? What is it that frustrates you sooo much that you would say things you need to apologize for? I just don't get it. What got you all so riled up and defensive for Dr Weber? You say your experience with his staff has been awful. That's a shame. I haven't had very many bad experiences with his staff. Just one, in fact, but in retrospect, I think it was more my perspective than their incompetence or rudeness. Would it be right for me to come on these boards and make a general accusation that the members were "bashing" DrW's staff? No, your experience is yours -- even if it differs from mine. Just as each person's experience with DrW is their own -- even if it differs from yours. I hope things start bothering you less. It's just a message board. Take care, Nancy

I'm really confused about all of this. I've read both you and your husband's comments and defense of Dr. Weber, but I didn't see the posts that you were referring to condemning Dr. Weber. I am not a patient of Dr. Weber but after reading what some people have said about him not returning calls, the one comment struck me mostly about a person who couldn't eat anything solid and his comment was "Well, you're losing weight aren't you?" would be enough to keep me from his office. Now with that being said, I don't consider that a negative, low, or anyone saying they'd reverse everything. I consider it experience of a surgeon. I am a pre-op and I DO want to know all the positive and negative even about my chosen surgeon. I want to know it all so that I can make a completely and totally informed decision based on ALL the information that I could. I used to work in medicine and have worked in several different offices and in NONE of those offices that I worked at would the idea of not giving the doctor a message even be considered. Usually how it worked is #1) we'd leave the message for the doctor on his/her desk for when he/she returned to the office, or #2) we'd page them to either call the office or leave the message on a pager, or #3) we'd call them on their cell phones if it was a life/death thing. If we didn't give the doctor the message, we'd be fired, period. What the doctor did with the message after they got it was out of our hands. And yes, I have gotten several calls from patients over the years saying, "You didn't give the doctor the message!" Well, Yes I did, but I can't help it if he didn't call you back. It was not my job to go to the doctor and say, "CALL THIS PATIENT!" Yes, I could remind him/her and say, "This person has called quite a few times, can you please call them?" But I couldn't pick up the phone, dial, and say, "TALK!" So saying that the office staff isn't giving the doctor the message (based on my experience in the field) is really a far stretch from what I could imagine happening. I'm not being critical of anyone or anything. I don't know Dr. Weber, have no experience with him whatsoever so I can't comment except on the posts that I see here. And all of the negativity that you're saying is here is not at all what I see. I've seen nothing that would dissuade me or scare me from getting the surgery and I've not even seen my surgeon yet! Michelle

OMG I can't believe this. Everyone is talking about my posts. Let me set this straight. I love Dr Weber. I think he is a wonderful surgeon. I am forever in his debt for giving me this tool that I am running with. (not literaly but would like to) Everyone on Dr Weber's staff has been so good to me also. Pam who went out of her way I'm sure on many occations to try and get my approval, I am so greatful to her. Lisa has helped me so much with this problem that I am having with not being able to eat. So I really do not have anything bad to say about Dr. Weber and his staff. If anyone thought that is what I was saying, no it wasn't. Arlene

Lets try this again. I posted a message but didn't show up. I believe everyone is talking about my post. I have never been displeased with Dr. Weber of his staff. Quite the opposite. I am very greatful to Dr. Weber for giving me this tool to run with. (not literaly, but I wish I could) He didn't have to perform this surgery on me. It is all up to him who can have it done. As for his staff, Pam worked really hard to get me approved. I have other health insurance which threw a wrench into everything. So for that, I am very greatful to her also. And Lisa, she has helped me so much the last few days with the problem I am having with not being able to eat. And she is so friendly when you go into see Dr. Weber. Summer, I didn't have much to do with her but she was nice enough to take messages from time to time. So, I really have nothing bad to say about any of them. I'm just very greatful to all of them for giving me this chance. If anyone thought I was saying negative things, I wasn't. Arlene

Arlene - I don't think that it's all about your posts. I think it's about the *readers*. ;) I think the regular contributors here on this board totally understood your frustration - or is that frusteration? - and put it in context with all that we know was going on at the time. You clearly said that you were VENTing. We took it as such. Don't feel defensive, dear. Your posts expressed part of your journey and we want to share in it. I didn't think you were "saying negative things" and I think the majority of the readers here would agree with me. Many hugs! Nancy

Arlene, I hope you don't give too much concern to this. Your posts are refreshing and we've all been there (or similar places) at one point or another. I like the way Nancy responded to your post yesterday. Please keep posting!!!

Ok, sorry... now its showing up twice Arlene

Hmmm... I'm really trying to relate here. I don't see the negativity that you are referring too. There were only a few posts that were negative: 1) your husbands. 2) Yours. Simple. I don't think anyone took anything you said out of context. We took it as you meant it, as we did with your husbands as well. It's obvious the both of you are mad ~ at what?!, I'm not sure. This board is about advice/opinions/support, etc ... a lot of times its used to make oneself feel better, or get ideas until the surgeon returns your call. Apparently from Dr Weber, its a hassle getting a callback. The mere fact that we have to justify "using this board" to you and your husband ****** me off. This may be hard for you to understand, but SOME people aren't going to be happy with your doctor and its not your job to stick up for him. They feel how they feel, and are entitled to it. Rather than subject them to YOUR negativity, perhaps you should have chose not to post.

Frankly, Scarlett.... Oh, and frustration is mispelled in your post.