The things people wish they had known before Weigh loss Surgery

I am 3 /12 weeks post op and really trying to over analyze things (tastes, smells, pains etc) so during my daily lunchtime internet surf of why....... I came across this post.  I can not take credit for anything listed but it surely is validating WHY I made this life choice in my WLS adventure, so I thought I would share it with ya'll.

Michelle

Things I wish I’d known:

• how hard it would be to eat and get the protein in.
• how hard it is to drink constantly.
• what types of pain I really would go through.
• what types of pain were "normal".
• what type of protein I would be able to handle in the liquid stage (at this point, not much). (one week post-op)

I thought I would have no appetite, but I do once I get through the morning sickness stage of my day. I didn't believe anyone when they said they couldn't tolerate water - I am one of those people. (3 weeks post-op)

I wish that I knew how truly hard it is to eat!! I am not hungry and it is very hard to get in all the protein that my body needs. Not only is it hard to get all the protein in, when I do eat I feel guilty. Hello!!! I know I shouldn't feel guilty, I am barely getting in 500 calories a day...but somewhere in my brain when I am eating (no matter what it is) I feel like I am being "bad". (1 month post-op)

I was shocked at the post operative pain I personally went through - for about a week. It was hell on earth & I cried & swore every day about what I had done to myself. Maybe I am a wimp & have a low pain threshold but even so, there should be stronger analgesia on offer to those of us that are wimps. (1 month post-op)

I also wish I'd been warned how emotional I'd be too & that sticking to fluids only is psychologically very difficult; if you used to be a "foodie". I wish I'd known how tired & weak I would be, just having a shower would exhaust me in the early days & I'd have to have a rest! (1 month out)

At nearly a month out I'm starting to feel better about why I had the surgery, the weight is melting away & I feel better physically every day. Also at last the pain is practically gone. I'm taking note of all the other advice for later in my journey & I am looking forward to more energy in a few months & a sense o*******n when I get to my 100lb down mark. I'm also buying clothes on ebay as I've dropped two sizes already. (1 month out).

I wish I understood what a challenge taking pills would be...at least at the beginning, and how all-consuming the transition is until it becomes 'just life.' ( 2 months post-op)

I wish I’d known that:

• Its hard to get in all the food you are supposed to every day.
• Some days are easier than others.
• How emotional you are when you get home.
• Why your pouch is happy one day and not the next.
• Plateaus.......need I say more!
• That my co-workers are MORE supportive than I thought.
• That I would show my scar off to people all the time - I am proud of it.
• How the smell of some food turns you right off.
• That there are many different rules from doctors.....and it’s ok, they are all correct. (3 months post-op)

... How much I would really miss food early out. It was crushing to not be able to run to the fridge and drown my sorrows and pain in a pint of Ben n Jerry’s. (3 months post-op)

... How much I actually thought about food! I didn’t understand why I was so obese, I honestly thought I ate pretty well most of the time. (3 months post-op)

... What a pain in the butt it is to sip sip sip sip sip sip liquids ALLLL day. (3 months post-op)

... How weird it is to "eat" dinner with your family without shoveling it in like everyone else. (3 months post-op)

... Having people that don’t know you have had the surgery assume you’re becoming deathly ill or suddenly anorexic. (3 months post-op)

... How completely amazing it feels to be at the same weight I was when I got married 8 years ago and know that I could be at a high school weight by Christmas!! (3 months post-op)

... How weird it would be to look in the mirror and finally see the person I thought I was all this time emerging from the layers. (3 months post-op)

I wish I had known how obsessed I would become with my weight and my appearance. Pre-surgery I was aware of how fat I was I just didn't dwell on it. As long as I was clean and semi-presentable I was fine. Now I find myself super conscious of everything I wear, every pound I lose and obsessing on how I can lose more weight in the fastest amount of time. Now I have to have pedicures, manicures, and my hair done. I feel uncomfortable without make up. I thought losing weight would make me more comfortable with my appearance and instead it has made me more self-conscious. Who knew! (4 months post-op).

I wish I understood how EVERY aspect of my life would change dramatically. I wish I understood how tremendously happy I would be. I wish I understood how for me... the benefits far outweighed the risks. I wish I understood how many beautiful people I'd meet, and how much they would add to my life. I wish I understood how committed I would be, how strong I would be, and how wonderful I'd feel. I wish I understood that I needed to do this a long time ago. (5 months post-op)

I wish I'd known how quickly you'd forget about the early stuff; pain, weakness, exhaustion & struggling with only drinking fluids for a month. It's horrible I know but it will pass believe me & is soooo worth it. (5 months post-op)

I'm now so fit I go to the gym every day for approx' an hour and a half, I'm lifting really big weights three times a week, I can do 90 mins of cardio work when not doing a class & I love it (I can even jog now for 15 mins). (5 months post-op)

I wish I'd have known not to sink so much money into protein supplements! (6 months post-op)

I do kinda wish I'd have done it in my younger years, but then again, I think timing and such is part of our great plan for our life. I wouldn't want to alter who I was supposed to be and what I needed to learn by my experiences. But it would have been so cool to be thinner and still be a young thing! (6 months post-op)

I wish I had known how bad I would feel not being able to help my daughters lose weight. I have this great tool and I try to lead by example, but you all know how hard it is without the tool. On the other hand: I wish I had know how good it would feel to wear whatever I want and know I look good in it. Sometimes when I am out I have to remind myself that I am small! (7 months post-op)

I wish I would have understood how losing weight would affect my relationships with other people. (8 months post-op)

I wish I would have known that eating and drinking were going to become a full time job. The planning and weighing the grocery shopping and reading labels on everything you buy. (8 months post-op)

I wish I would have known how difficult it was going to be to answer the same questions from people daily after surgery: How much have you lost? What did you eat today? Is that a new shirt? Did you get your water and exercise in today? (8 months post-op)

I wish I would have been told how rough this surgery is mentally. The physical and mental changes that your body goes through are unbelievable. It is way more then just "losing weight". (8 months post-op)

And the biggest one for me is that I never understood how hard it was going to be to say good bye to my best friend in the whole world. FOOD! It was there for me for any emotion or feeling that I had. It is like a death in the family not being able to rely on it or use it anymore. (8 months post-op)

I wish I knew that I would be thinking about food constantly throughout my day. Food is on my mind now more than it was when I was 265 pounds! (8 months post-op)

I wish I knew that I would be disappointed in myself for "only" having lost 70 pounds. I think if I hadn't had the surgery and lost 70 pounds I would be jumping for joy but now I can't help but feel somewhat unsuccessful. (8 months post-op)

I wish I knew I would feel guilty for eating certain things even though its nowhere near the amount I used to eat (i.e. a cookie...) (8 months post-op)

I wish I knew that my butt and my chest were going to become flat and my hair was going to fall out so much. (8 months post-op)

I wish I knew how overwhelming shopping can be when you're not limited to the "Lane Bryants" of the world. (8 months post-op)

That at 9+ months out you REALLY have to work at eating correctly... you CAN eat more and you DO have the old cravings. I did know this before surgery...I knew this during months 1-9...but I thought to myself, "nope, not me...I am going to be one of the ones that is never hungry...that never wants to eat" YEAH RIGHT! What a dork I am...It has just in the past few weeks become such a job to eat correctly and not eat crap. (9 months post-op)

I wish I had known that I am NOT truly that big boned......and therefore know not to overbuy clothes when I get to the limit my mind had made. Yep, a whole bag of my "never can imagine" size barely worn if at all, and hanging in the closet are the clothes in my "shut up......I would never be THAT small" size! (11 months post-op)

I wish I had known that my tastes would change and make some of the healthy eating aspects easier than I imagined. (11 months post-op)

I wish I had known that I would still somehow miraculously be able to consume mammoth amounts of salty munchies......which makes some aspects of my new life more difficult than imagined. (11 months post-op)

I wish I had known not to overbuy the supplements, but rather to stock up on tea, cocoa powder, and dry milk. (11 months post-op)

I wish I had known that I was not saying good-bye to food, but just setting new boundaries in our relationship. (11 months post-op)

I wish I had known that I would like my body more and more with clothes on and less and less naked as I get smaller. (11 months post-op)

I wish that I realized how difficult "head hunger" was going to be for the first few months post op. I kept hearing about the fact that although I would be on a restricted diet, the DESIRE to eat "regular" food was going to be nearly insatiable. I couldn't eat like a normal person and I knew that, but I wanted to so bad. The mental changes that you go through to change the way you think and feel about food is a slow, phased and sometimes painful (but necessary) process. I did not understand that pre-op. I kept thinking I could deal with it without any problems at all and I was wrong. (1 year post-op).

I also wished I listened to people tell me that I should not buy any new clothes (except for thrift or deeply discounted****il I was ALL THE WAY down to my new weight. Along the way, I kept thinking that was the smallest I could get, so I may as well get new clothes. I got a little wear out of the in-between sizes, but not much. (1 year post-op)

I wish I had known the REAL reason why I was doing it - which had nothing to do with losing weight, but was about reclaiming my life. (One year post-op)

I wish I had known that the way I felt the first month post-op was temporary. Maybe it was better that I went in not knowing how truly awful I was going to feel for a while. Looking back on it, it passed quickly, but they don't call it hell week for nothing. (One year post-op)

I wish I had known how amazing it is to meet people who haven't seen me since before the surgery. (One year post-op)

I wish I had known that my life would change so much so fast. I love who I am for the first time in decades, and glory in the ability of this body to do so much without pain or tears or humiliation. (One year post-op)

I wi****ruly understood the COMMITMENT...100% life style change....they told me but real life is different from a zerox handout/support group once a month. (1 year post-op)

I wish I’d known:

1. that smells are so much stronger now and can make you ill
2. that skin is not always so elastic when it's going down as it was going up in weight
3. that your relationships change so much because you change, not just physically but emotionally. You have to deal with the issues you stuffed down your mouth, so the rawness of that can be hard to swallow
4. people don't always think you look good
5. some people like you better fat and don't know how to deal with you skinny
6. you really could lose your life and surgery is a huge step! I was so lucky my doc was a good one and fixed me up quick
7. How eating is a chore sometimes and you won't be hungry for food some days
8. people will think you are sick "all" the time even if it only happened 4 times in 9 months
9. that you won't see the changes as fast as some other people see them so you can get discouraged when you haven't lost as much weight as so n so
10. that the people who were attracted to you when you were fat, may not be attracted to you skinny
11. people who wouldn't look at you before, now have an interest in you
12. family can ignore your accomplishments because they are jealous or resent you took a chance on your life
13. that it would give me back my life such as playing, running, jumping, stretching, walking, etc...
14. fitting into clothes you haven't ever dreamed you would is such a HIGH!!
15. that WLS can be lonely if you don't have support (14 months post-op)

I wish I had trusted my fellow gbs friends when they said "Don't buy too many clothes...you will shrink out of them" I never believed I would ever be the size I am today. (18 months post-op)

I wish I’d known that it would become a daily struggle for me to keep on track. I was told it gets harder and I have to work at it every day. The good thing is this tool works and forces me to eat well in order to feel good. (2 years post-op)

I wish I knew how badly I would hate the sagging skin. I thought I would be ok with it and it would be better than having all of the extra weight, but it really became and still is an issue with me. The thing I can not tolerate the most is my calves...all of those who know me know that I am so called teeny tiny, but my calves are huge. I have to roll them up in my pants...literally. When I wear shorts, and my legs are relaxed, I have calf wings...seriously. I am not exaggerating. the nurse at my pcp told me yesterday that she can't believe how big they are in proportion to my body. I was laying on the table and my calves were flopped there skin laying there....looked like slabs of meat with the skin hanging off. At least she was honest with me. She told me my tummy and chest look great…I think because she felt bad after she talked about my legs. No worries...I know they are gross. Anyway, skin is a big thing with me and I just wish I knew that I was going to need help with it...mental help that is. I don't regret surgery though...not for a minute. (2 years post-op).

 

 

 

Michelle...

This is one of the best posts I have read about post WLS life... it is total right on... now I am almost 8 months out... but what this person posted about life at 8 and 9 months out.. is EXACTLY where I am at today....

You may want to post this one the Main WLS site... or on the Main RNY site....  I am going to copy your post... so that I can review in those times when I struggle with the Day to Day life of a post op WLS patient.

Helen

What a great post! I am truly truly relating to the NOT buying clothes thing... I bought some pants I "lost" in my closet and never got to enjoy them, so I took them back to Macy's. I tried on an outfit for a wedding I'm going to next month, but I really don't know if I can rationalize spending $100 on something I might not be able to wear in a month.

Boy..these things really ring true. I remember at first my inability to drink plain water. That really was one of the hardest things for me. I was used to slamming water down.
Now at 4 months I can finally drink plain water again.
Thanks alot for posting that!
Deb

thanks, this is a great post. As i read it, i know, i cant know any of these things till i walk in those shoes (though i will buy tea an coca but less suppliments)...