6 months out and bad habits coming back

I also struggle with some of the same issues you have. One thing that helps me is to get up and exercise first thing in the morning. I don't particularly enjoy exercise and if I get up and do it I am less likely to eat something I shouldn't later, because I have already put the effort into exercise and don't want to screw up my day. You said you run, maybe an early morning run while someone else can watch your child? or put the kiddo in the stroller and walk fast? If the child is older, put them on a trike or bike and walk/job alongside. All of that helps weight loss and can elevate mood also. Make sure you are taking good vitamins.

I too have a family and clearing every carb out of my house is not an option at this point. However, there are some carbs that I like better than others and I try my hardest to only bring carbs in the house that I don't really care about. When I'm crawling the walls to eat something I shouldn't I remember the advice someone on one of the forums gave..."I can always have tea", and sometimes that is my lifeline. Really, thank goodness for whoever wrote that, because sometimes that's my mantra. Make yourself a nice cup of tea and LEAVE THE KITCHEN.

My top 10 distractions from food are:

1. take a bath

2. read a book

3. paint my nails

4. fold clothes

5. try on and get rid of clothes that are too big for me (yeah)

6. yard work - even just sweeping off steps or the deck

7. go outside and listen to nature - close your eyes and really listen, breath deeply

8. brush the dog

9. artistic pursuits - knit, draw, paint, needlework, calligraphy, coloring books whatever you prefer

10. take a nap or go to bed early

You will notice that many of these include things that keep my hands busy, thereby keeping me from feeding myself. I think one of the hardest things about this for me is the realization of how often I was using food as a coping mechanism, and now I do not have that option, so I have to find other ways of dealing with the everyday stresses of life. It's a process, but the good news is that you are in charge of it. Best Wishes.

Many people go on the weight loss journey ...thinking the weight is what is holding them back from living.

They lose weight and they look back and ask "OK, now what?"

Sure - it is nice to be smaller size, be able to buy clothes almost anywhere... But that often does not fix what it is really going on with us.

At one point I needed therapy once a week. To find my real self. Some day I feel like I am still searching. Other times - I know I found "her".

If you are sabotaging yourself - you may ask why do you do that?

Being skinny does not fix our issues. Being fit does not do that either.

There was a lot I was blaming my weight for when I was MO. over 9 years ago I jointed the "skinny world " and found out that my some of my issues were independent to my weight. I had to learn to deal with them without eating or drinking my emotions. I am still working on that.

That's exactly what I'm realizing after all of this! I thought losing the weight would make me happy with myself and life. I see my therapist next week and I'm going to see if I can talk to her more often. I'm looking for that satisfaction in life by using food but all it's doing is pushing me further away

First off, I am sorry you are going through this. As people here say, the surgery fixes our insides, it does not automatically fix our mental issues.

That said - you are not a failure! A little louder for the folks in the back...YOU ARE NOT A FAILURE! Those are some impressive weight loss results in 6.5 months, and you should be extremely proud. Many people never take the steps to do what you have done.

I remember when it started to be easier for me to eat some of the "bad foods" I did as well. They made me terribly sick, with vomiting, which was the greatest incentive to stay away. Now, almost 9 years out I can eat bad stuff (and I do from time to time) but it stalls, reverses or undoes a lot of my goods efforts and so remains a reason not to overdo it. I never wanted this surgery to limit my ability to enjoy "bad foods" from time to time (e.g. birthdays, holidays) and that was a concern of mine. Don't beat yourself up just because you ate something you shouldn't have. Learn from it. Like another poster suggested, I try not to buy those items so there is less temptation in the house. So it will only be available when I am out, and I have the ability to walk away (or at least consider whether I really really want it). Figure out what works for you.

It sounds like you have some mental issues to work through - kudos to you for recognizing it and asking for help. Echoing other comments, maybe you need to find someone who is more available or maybe is better addressing your particular difficulties. You are always welcome to vent here, but do you have a friend you could confide in too? Or maybe find a new workout buddy - for me finding a new activity I enjoyed was more motivation to keep up with the exercise and not to indulge.

P.S. I would be happy if I didn't get Aunt Flo for two months. Some things never become less of a pain! :)

Best of luck!