6 months out and bad habits coming back

hello all,

im about 6 1/2 months out from vsg. My highest weight was 275 & starting weight from the morning of surgery was 222 and today I'm around 170lbs (I'm 5'5). I was doing well with exercising and eating the right things but 2 months ago I started trying more foods (the bad ones) like breads and sweets. Plus I can eat a lot of them and I pick them over my protein . I find myself addicted to them again! I try and try to change this. I do fine for a day and then I screw up. In March I was down to 161 lbs. my doctor wants me to be around 146lbs by october my year anniversary. Anyways I have this huge mental struggle going on. I look in the mirror and I don't recognize myself but at the same time I feel like I'm 275 lbs again also my hair is short and it's always been long but I cut it because it was falling out. ? maybe I have body dysmorphia . I feel like a failure and that I got this surgery for nothing. I thought I would be happy losing weight but I'm not, sure I don't have foot pain anymore, I can run 3 miles and do activities a lot easier now and you think I'd be more grateful and happy. I just find myself being moody and depressed. I work with a therapist and I'm seeing a psychiatrist in May to possibly get some type of depression meds. I guess I'm just wondering if anyone else has felt like this or had the same experience. I really hope this will pass and it's just my hormones. I really don't want to take any meds, but I don't want to screw all this up either. Also my "Aunt Flo" hasn't came for almost 2 months but I'm not pregnant I know for sure plus I have an Iud. I'm just hoping I'll get out of this funk soon and start losing again... thanks for letting me vent

The best thing for me is "out of sight out of mind" do not buy those things. Easier said than done if you have a family. Are you logging everything you eat, even the bad things? Seeing what it does to your daily caloric intake might push you into avoiding it more and more.

I was logging them but for the last week I?ve kinda given up on it. I will even make my meals and not eat them. I do have a family and my mother lives here also my husband eats healthy with me but he still likes his snacks, but they aren?t super bad things. I was doing well at one point with having a little bit of things here and there, and charting it but it just got out of control recently. But today I decided enough is enough. I can?t do this to myself anymore. Thank you for your input :)

I wish you all the luck. It is a long journey and at over a year out there are times I make bad choices at times. Don't let one bad choice make you make another! We all have to learn and reign in our bad habits. I know I did! Those pesky bad habits know all our weaknesses to make us want them, like a bad ex.

Thank you!!

Have you seen a therapist? It's important to understand the mechanism behind sabotaging yourself and learn how to stop it. And I agree with Mersh - don't bring that stuff in the house. You can't eat it if it isn't available.

Hello, yes I have been seeing a therapist for about a year but now I've started to see her once a month and she helps me, but I just lose sight of the things she tells me after a few days and I resort back to my self sabotaging behaviors. I just know I can't do this to myself anymore. I just hate feeling like this and today after writing this all out made me realize enough is enough.

Maybe more often would help to reinforce the things you're working on with her?

Yes I think you're right About that

I see her next week and I'm gonna ask her about that. She is always booked she does let me schedule 2 appts at a time but they usually are a month out at least. Plus my schedule bc I have a little one I cannot take to my appointments. Today is a new day though and I'm feeling positive so hoping it will reflect on my choices I make today! I really appreciate your help ?