regain help... I have gained almost 30 pounds and most is probably from alcohol and...

Glad to read it is not a problem to stop drinking- a step in the right direction!

What is an alcoholic?

You are drinking a few drinks several nights a week due to stress at home. You are not drinking for fun etc. An alcoholic is not someone who has no job, there are many functioning excesive drinkers. But its brilliant you can stop easily that does show you have no issue, but make sure you do not underestimate how it can creep up on anyone, and there are people at AA meetings with a fulltime job only drinking on an evening.

No judgment, you know what your dealing with, everyone is different. Hope things are better at home :)

You may not consider yourself an alcoholic, but you're absolutely a "high-risk drinker." For a woman, high-risk is drinking more than 3 drinks in a night, or more than 7 in the course of a week. (Source)

You may also fit the criteria for an "alcohol use disorder" if you meet any two of the criteria from this list, such as drinking more than you intend to, or drinking even though it causes you anxiety about other health problems.

I had been there, done that. Really. I had 35 lbs regain. I did not think I was an alcoholic. And I really was not, but I was getting there. I used alcohol as a crutch to get me through the bad days. I had days I could not wait to get home so I could relax. Once I relaxed - alcohol also caused my BS to just drop enough to make me hungry... Just enough to grab a bite of this or that. And .. alcohol lowered my mental strength to say no to foods that i otherwise avoided. It was not a lot... But enough to cause gradual weight gain of 35 lbs.

First I stopped alcohol every day and only allowed myself some on weekends when out with friends. Well... That was tough. Tougher that I thought. So i have to give it up completely. In 3 months I lost 18 lbs and started feeling good about myself. I was still snacking. In month 4 I reintroduced wine to one time a week. I stopped losing. But I was happy in size 8-10. Only giving up wine completely, and going on a strict diet allowed me to lose the rest of my regain.

I now may have a glass of wine once a month. And only when we are out, and I am not driving. But I no longer allowed some snacks. Not drinking wine gives me the extra calories to use on fruits - berries. Or nuts.

Stress - it is there. Anxiety high - I could not handle it lately - so I talked to me doc and he temporarily put me on antianxiety drugs. I chose that over alcohol right now. For now - that is less evil for me.

Being dependent on alcohol for stress is more dangerous for me that using medication.