My secret

Hmmm this is a tough one. Gwen and Grim make good points - no one will believe you just suddenly "started eating better" and lost half of your body weight :) When people would comment to me, it was normally something like "Oh my god, look at you, you look amazing!" and I would always answer, "thanks - yeah, I didn't have any health issues but I had to look to the future so I had a procedure and since then I've been eating low carb and exercising". Somehow the word "procedure" seemed so much lighter than "operation", and honestly, it opens the door for other obese people to feel comfortable asking me about it - I have had two friends have WLS after seeing my experience! You can definitely choose to handle it however you like, but I did find being upfront sort of nipped it in the bud.

And when ANYONE (including my mom!) asked me how much I lost, I always said "I'm not actually telling anyone" with a smile. Mostly because I'm so embarrassed by the amount!

It is so personal on what one feels comfortable sharing. In my case, I did not disclose the surgery but have no problem sharing that I lost 150+ pounds. I figure that it is blatantly obvious that it is a lot of weight was gone and putting a number to it doesn't change what they already see.

Shonda Rhimes, creator of Grey's Anatomy and Scandal, has lost about 150 pounds over the last few years. I don't know if she had surgery (she has been very private about it but there have been rumors). Below is an excerpt from an essay she wrote about her weight loss that, to me, rang so true. She was talking about how people didn't speak to her when she was heavy:

"When I was fat, I wasn't a PERSON to these people. Like I had been an Invisible Woman who suddenly materialized in front of them. Poof! There I am. Thin and ready for a chat.

These days, I feel like a chunky spy in a thinner world. Strangers tell fat jokes in front of me. Jokes not meant for me. But...completely for the woman I used to be 150 pounds ago. The woman I could be again one day. The woman I will always be inside.

Because being thinner doesn't make you a different person. It just makes you thinner."

Say thank you and immediately change the subject -- How Bout those Cubs?

So many inspirational people out there. I need to do a google search. Thank you for sharing this.

I told my family, close friends and coworkers but have not shared on facebook because most of the people I am "facebook friends" with are only acquaintances and I don't post a lot of pics of myself (mostly my kids and dogs) so they probably haven't noticed. If someone comments either in person or on FB about how I look thinner or asks about my weight loss I'm honest about it. I may, at some point, make a post about this journey but I don't feel the need right now. The people that I care most about know about my surgery and are very happy for me.

If they don't like it or don't agree with the way I did it that is their problem, not mine!

Like Gwen, I have a lot of friends who are nerdy fans, in my case 90% of them are Harry Potter fans. I "outed" myself to this group first ****ep my Facebook friends sorted LOL). Then I decided that I'd rather own it than have people wondering. Partly I came to this after a coworker was using the "diet and exercise" explanation for her rapid weight loss.

One challenge I had is that I'm what is considered a "light weight" bariatric patient. My BMI was 35, I weight 206 the day of surgery with no weight loss prior. Many people reacted to my announcement with "But you don't NEED bariatric surgery!" because they only associate that with 'My Six Hundred Pound Life'. I have been answering "I've been trying to lose the weight the old fashioned way for over a decade with only marginal success. Weight loss surgery not only has a much higher success rate, it also has the best long term success. I have no doubt many people in my state are successful losing weight through diet and exercise alone, but after not getting there for a decade I decided to go with the BEST option for long term success."

I'm only down 35 pounds, but it's very noticeable because I've lost a lot around my face. So now when I see people and they gush "OMG you've lost so much weight" I just smile and say "Yep, bariatric surgery for the win!!!" When they insist that I wasn't 'THAT' overweight, I just smile and say "I know, I looked damn good for being morbidly obese but none the less, it wasn't a good look for my long-term health" then if they keep talking about it I steer the conversation to my Non-scale Goals and activities. This week I put a deposit on a puppy (not due till August) and I've been joking that with the money I save on food, and can purchase pure happiness!!!

I also had a 35-ish BMI and I got a ton of those comments at first too. Those seem to have stopped. They must have forgotten my degree of fatness

i also decided not to tell anyone. my weight loss has started to be noticeable and i eat noticeably different and friends ask about this when we go out etc. i lost weight a few years ago and i think people think of me as smaller than my heaviest weight, so people seem to accept when i say that i am just eating differently to try to be healthier and lose weight. i say i am eating low carb and high protein and tracking what i eat. i don't think you need to tell people if you don't want to but it's good to have a canned answer that's true and believable (although leaving one part out of course). when people compliment me i just say thanks. good luck!

my close friends all know. I'm also upfront about the surgery if another obese person asks me how I did it. They'd never believe the diet & exercise schlock. Skinny people - depends. I usually say diet, exercise, medical supervision. They seem to buy that.