mom here for support on my daughter's decision to get VSG

I'm 43 yo stay at home mom, my daughter's been overweight since 11 (following her puberty), she is now 23, (5"10, 312lbs) morbidly obese and wanting to get a sleeve gastrectomy ( because she fears gastric bypass would give her dumping syndrome life-long). she has a polycystic ovary condition and diabetes (mild), our surgeon said this is the best way to bring her back to normal life. how far is this true? has anyone been cured of diabetis or polycysticovaries after the surgery? we have planned our surgery in mexico in about 3 months, I want to learn as much before we have it done. thank you very much for your replies.

Hi Jane, thanks for reaching out.  This is an awesome forum to get information, support and a kick in the axx when you need it.  I do have a question though.  Does your daughter want this surgery?  Because in the end all the support in the world is awesome, but if the person having the surgery isn't ready to commit, then it won't be successful long term.   This is a lifelong change in the way a person needs to eat.  I love my mother to the end and she's always wanted me to lose weight, but until I was ready, hit rock bottom, did I finally say, NOW I'm ready.  

Thanks

Diabetes cannot be cured but can go into remission.

There are pros and cons for all surgery.  RNY can result in dumping if large amounts of sugar are eaten.

VSG can result in GERD and lifelong need for PPI's.  Research the current medical concerns about taking PPI's long-term.

Weight loss depends on her ability to stick to the post-op diet and follow the rules.  Has your daughter dieted successfully in the past?  Does she understand the discipline that will be required to be successful after surgery?

You are doing the right thing by researching first.   This site is a good place for information.

she lives away from me so I don't have much information about her dieting habits last 5 years, but she has dieted for short periods during her adolescence, say about a week of non carb and so, usually she's a determined person, she had a major personal incident with a person, 3 years back, which changed her eating into emotional but with god and our family's support she is strong and healing. this is why I even considered her surgery, she was only 230 before 3 years. I want her to be happy and live her life like any of deserve to.

I think it's so awesome that you are reaching out for support on yours  and your daughters behalf.  You can learn so many new and exciting things on here.  Do's and Don'ts.  Foods, recipes, what to expect.  How much she should be eating so you don't think she's starving herself.  My family thinks this sometimes but I have to remind them my stomach is at least 80% smaller than theirs.

Everyone on here tells you exactly how they feel so please don't get mad if something is answered the way you don't want it to be. Everyone's experience can be a little different, from pain, to meds to weight loss itself.  We are all different so remember that as well.

Best of luck.  I think 95% of the people you will speak to on the forum would agree it is the best decision they've ever made and 1) wish they'd done it sooner, and 2) would do it all over again in a heartbeat.

She will do well with  all the right encouragement.  Many members also attend weight loss groups and some do over eaters anonymous.  A lot of us have some type of emotional bond with food that we need to correct in our minds first and foremost.

My hospitals offers pre and post op weight loss counseling (for free).  check your local hospital.  Would be great for your daughter to attend a pre-op meeting!!

I'm so glad you came to the forum for information.

I have PCOS, and I was post menopausal when I had surgery, so I can't speak to the infertility part.  But I did find other symptoms faded after surgery.  My skin got softer, my facial hair became finer, and the discoloration of the skin at the trunk of my body is lessened.  I suspect the surgery would help the infertility, as well, but I didn't really think about that much, being in my 60's at time of surgery.

I know many people report dramatic improvements in their diabetes immediately after surgery.  It seems to happen immediately, not after the weight loss - and this surprised me.

The weight loss surgery is amazing.  I'd been struggling unsuccessfully to lose weight for decades.  I could lose weight, but I'd always gain it back with a vengeance.  This is the first time that I've been able to lose all the weight and maintain the loss for years. 

Its not easy.  You have to commit to following the rules and its never done.  You have to watch your food intake for the rest of your life, but it does make it possible.

best wishes,

Carol

My daughter is 35 with PCOS.  She desperately wants to have this surgery.  She is 450 pounds and was in the 300's when she graduated high school.  If we had a way for her to get this surgery, she'd be there in a heart beat.  I had the surgery 4 months ago and she wants to be where I am.  I so desperately want that for her also.  I'd say GO FOR IT.  Bring it on with bells on!  It will dramatically change her (and your) lives. 

check out wlsfa.org they have grants.

This is so great the way you support her, it's best she goes for it while she's young than later! good luck on the surgery! I've had pcos and my surgeon said it'll diminish eventually, so I'm sure that part's true and many said their diabetes came into control. good luck on the surgery! hope your daughter finds what she wants! and this is so sweet of you!! :)

Hi Jane,

Welcome, and hopefully you find all the right information out so that your daughter can make a decision that is best for her.  Possible TMI coming - I have PCOS as well since I was 18.  I will say that being overweight and having PCOS makes it harder to conceive.  My husband tried for nearly 3 1/2 years with no avail.  My doctor at the time said to keep at it, we were young and it would happen.  She never said anything about my weight or my PCOS.  I changed doctors and he was much more supportive and informative.  Ultimately, though, on our own my Husband and I decided to lose weight before seeking any fertility treatments.  I lost nearly 50 lbs and he almost 40 lbs.  After the first 30-35 lb loss my cycle appeared (it was previously very random) and I charted on when I would ovulate and we conceived right away on my first ovulation cycle.  Now, this of course will not always be others experience but losing nearly 50 lbs is what my body needed to get kicked started.  When I went for my first ultrasound I told the doctor about all my history and he checked both ovaries and after all that weight loss there were no cysts to be found other than the "pregnancy" cyst they like to call.  Again, this is not going to be everyone's case but for me, every time I would lose weight I would start my cycle and ovulate.  Every time I gained...it would stop.  No period - no ovulation.  I have three beautiful children and I actually conceived our youngest when I was nearly my highest...I didn't know I was pregnant until nearly 10 weeks (due to my lack of period I didn't even know I ovulated/conceived).  I will tell you though, due to my high weight and then high blood pressure I developed super imposed pre-e and delivered our daughter 3 months early.  I know that if I was healthier and weighed less that wouldn't have happened.  I just had my VSG on 4/28/16, and for me it was a tough first week, but I am feeling so much better now, and since surgery have lost 17 lbs for a total of 38 since I started this journey.

Good luck to her - getting healthy and staying there is hard but with the right mind set we can and will!