I need to "reboot" but cannot seem to make this happen

Beautifully expressed Rocky. This isn't rocket science. But all of us know how hard it is to actually DO what we are supposed. to. I've never met anyone who thinks this is easy, or forgotten where we came from. It's a constant struggle. Many days, I lose. But the good days now far, far outpace the bad.

In the end, it will always be up to us. We have choices.

Maybe we should let her into our secret group with all the easy, quick fixes we know of and don't share - good grief.

Everything you do is based on the choices you make.  It's not your parents, your past relationships, your job, the economy, the weather, the holidays, the weather, an argument or your age that is to blame. You and only you are responsible for every decision and choice you make. Period.

From what you express, you are not the kind of hypocrite I was talking about at all!  I think you get it--that it's a constant struggle, that we are not "cured."  WLS did give me a headstart and nothing more.  My gripe is with those who do not struggle, cannot understand regain, and reduce real struggles--like the kind I had before surgery--to "eat less."  That was unhelpful then, and is unhelpful now.  Maybe that tactic--the shame me into feeling like I've made poor choices and am a bad person for it--works well for some.  If I could have been shamed into losing weight, I would have surely met that threshold at 277lbs.  But I did not.  And it is as bad of a tactic now as it was then.  I stand committed to the belief that, but for my WLS, I would have never lost weight.  I know that my sleeve is the only thing standing between me and MO.  I do not try to say that I am "cured" or that I am a health guru now because I know that I am not.  I thank God that my sleeve still works as well as it does and I, admittedly, need to do a better job protecting it.  

I originally viewed my sleeve as much of a necessary life-saving instrument as perhaps having a stint put in to open clogged arteries may be.  And I still view it that way.  To further that analogy, I also need to make the types of choices that work with this life-saving device, not against it.  Which I think is what you are saying too.  I want to know what those rules are and what some helpful tips are.  I do think they exist.  I was never given much aftercare advice--my surgeon was quite liberal about how to eat after surgery and now he is deceased, god rest his soul.  But I think weight re-gain is much more complex than reduced to a simple "stop making excuses."  Like I said before, maybe that shaming tactic works with some.  But for others I have to wonder if they have experienced the same life-long difficulty losing weight as I have.  Because if they have, I cannot believe that they would find such advice helpful.  I have received some wonderful advice on this forum.  And I've also received a great deal of negativity (I'm not speaking of you).  I believe that this negativity is why OH has shrunk so much in the 6 years that I've been on here.  I think surely I am not a failure yet.  Surely others have found their weight creeping up and can relate and would have truly helpful advice.  With only 10lbs. of regain perhaps others would contend that I have not entirely missed the mark, and with a few adjustments I could right the course for life.  Maybe that's naive of me, but that is what I had hoped to find here.  That's why I posted here.  All I ask is that people be compassionate with others struggling with the same disease we all do.  

I agree this forum has shrunk in the last six years.  I thought it was perhaps due to an increase in other forms...although I cannot locate many other forums. It could be due to the negativity.  It seems as if there are a lot of new members but several of the more successful members have gone.