The Secret: Determination.......

If you don't have it.......it's going to be very hard and maybe even impossible....???

First, issues, issues, issues...... as the obese, we pretty much all have some kind of issues, heck most non-obese have issues !!!

At near 7 years out I've experienced just about every known stage and have made up some of my own. Even now, I am amazed on how much more there is to learn. For a while now the learning has been much more about practical things vs. science, but frequently there is a science reason for something practical and visa versa.

I recently had lunch with an actress friend that had RNY about 10 years ago who I hadn't seen for a few years. We always had quick chats about WLS.

Well, she looked great, beautiful, like someone who never had a weight issue. Her weight looked same same, but she had a little bit more bounce to her her step..... looked like happiness and confidence.

I think I have written about this subject before, but after a couple hours with her and talking almost exclusively about our WLS related experiences, I once again see determination as the one thing long term maintainers have in common and is something I need to work on more !!!

Her conclusion is that my surgery was more effective than hers because she is capable of eating much more than me.

My conclusion is that she has much more determination than I do and I need to get me some more.

I told her that I admired her determination and there was no wonder why she has done so well..... she said something very powerful that stuck with me......"Determination makes it easier".

frisco

TRUTH!

I have to agree with you. I did not understand determination as a life long tool in my WLS journey as a new post op. My determination was simply to get to goal. That was it. I did not have determination to stay in a particular clothing size, weight range, etc... Sure, I had a want, a goal, a dream to do those things, but I didn't have determination. 

Gaining weight after hitting goal and loving life and dealing with all the emotional baggage that comes with regain taught me that to stay in this game on my terms I must have the following qualities in my pocket every day:

Determination, Intelligence, Education, Tenacity and above all I must be Deliberate. The minute I start to eat without making choices that are deliberate, I will start to gain weight. 

Yeah, DETERMINATION. Get you some! It works! 

That's a great way to sum up what determination does for us.  I can think of countless times that life cir****tances got me down pre surgery and I plunged into a vat of food to comfort myself.  The difference now is that pretty much no matter what life throws at me, I say "I'm not gonna make this crappy situation worse by giving up what I've worked so hard for. Nothing is worth that". Decision is made. I move on. That's one way determination makes it easier for me!

Well Frisco, another excellent post. Reminds me of my first private meeting with Dr, Cirangle.  I told him I was a fairly accomplished person who was able to do whatever I set my mind to except weight control seemed to be something I just couldn't have.  He said flat out "YOU CAN" . It made me a believer and I think that belief gave me the determination to do what he advised.  Plus my brother told me to do exactly what the doctor said and that rung true.   

But all that was good for the weight loss phase and I realize it it true for the maintenance phase.  Believing I can do this helps foster the determination. Determination means not giving up.  And your friend is so right - determination makes it easier. You have to be in charge of this part of your life (and all other parts in my opinion) and not just let life happen which means excess eating will just happen. 

Glad your friend is doing well.   And you too Frisco.  Love your posts.    Diane S.

P.S.  I wish I could buy a big box of determination at Costco.