Overreacting or unsupportive?

(deactivated member)
on 2/17/16 12:53 pm
VSG on 12/17/15

Oh man In and Out is ah-mazing lol. I mean you could go every once in awhile for a treat of french fries I suppose. My mom is still learning and I think she worries I am obsessed because of my previous eating disorder. However I am seeing a therapist twice a month and am very in control of my issues right now and am well medicated to handle my anxiety and depression which are part of what caused my disorder so she knows I am working hard to be healthy. She does get concerned sometimes because I don't eat many fruits or vegies but I just explain if I eat those there is less room in my tummy for protein when I have vegies or fruits which I do love both. Usually I will try and sneak some in as a snack (last night I had Love Beets from Costco as a snack) I told her as my sleeve matures I should start to have more room but I am only 9 weeks out I have a lot of restriction (which I love) and it will be like that for awhile.

(deactivated member)
on 2/17/16 7:14 am

I think if it makes you stay on plan then keep doing what makes you comfortable. I think a lot of people think just because our stomachs are smaller that we still can eat whatever we want.

It is good that you did what you needed to do to stay on track. We an easily fall into bad habits. 

 

(deactivated member)
on 2/17/16 12:57 pm
VSG on 12/17/15

I've spent a whole lot of my life with bad habits and I do not want to fall back into them. I knew doing this surgery that it was irreversible and I had to commit to eating better. I have had a few slips but really nothing much to speak about, mostly over indulging on wasabi almonds (I try and not keep them in my house because of this) which the calories add up fast on.

tonya2741
on 2/17/16 9:38 am

I, too, love my mom more than life itself, but she's not very supportive overall of my weight loss. Like most of you, food was reward for good behavior and symbolic of love. Now that I've had my vsg (11/23/15), she still tries to give me food. She's made my favorite stuffed peppers (whi*****lude rice) and mashed potatoes, stuffed manicotti, vegetable soup with pasta, buttery garlic knots, Lenny's pizza, etc., and acts hurt when I don't indulge. She knows what I can and can't have, yet she continues to make this DELICIOUS food, all the while knowing I can't (or shouldn't) eat it now. Plus, every time I walk in her house, the counter is full of chips, chocolates, and sugary delectables. PLUS, last night when I visited, I kid you not, she had a box of Krispy Kreme donuts, homemade banana bread, and a box of chocolate covered toffee all laying out on the counter. I finally told her and my dad that I won't come over any more if they're going to continue to leave stuff like that out when they know I'm coming to visit. I know I need willpower, but geez louise! It's like taking a gambling addict to a casino with an open debit card! How strong is one person expected to be? I'm trying to get her to eat healthier with me, but she's a sugar addict (I definitely inherited that gene from her), and she's not going to change anytime soon. All I can do is continue the fight to eat healthy and stay on track. Who knew the family would be the ones I have to avoid the most?

HW: 246; VGS: 11/23/15 Dr. Joel Sebastien; SW: 226; GW: 130; CW: 166  

"If it doesn't challenge you, it doesn't change you." Fred DeVito                 "Perhaps, this very instant is your time." Louise Bogan

                                     "A year from now, you'll wish you had started today." Karen Lamb 

(deactivated member)
on 2/17/16 1:08 pm
VSG on 12/17/15

Wow, that would be hard definitely! Luckily there isn't too many treats at my mom and grandpa's house, a few leftover Christmas cookies and some muffins (my grandpa has a major sweet tooth) but they don't bother me because my main love of sugary things in a good chocolate truffle (think Lindt truffles). But my mom is pretty respectful when I see her (which is only about once every 2 weeks because of our work schedules conflicting) and even will choose not to indulge when I am there. For example my grandpa went to Dairy Queen last Sunday when I was there and called my mom and offered to get her something and my mom likes DQ a lot but told him she didn't want anything even though I told her I would be fine even if she ate it in front of me (I can't eat ice cream anyways because of my lactose intolerance) or she could put it in the freezer until I left but she said "I don't need it anyway". She just wants to cook for me because food is love in our family part of the reason why a lot of us have weight problems or yo-yo up and down.

chaplainJess
on 2/19/16 9:21 am

My family has also struggled with the idea of food = love. I realized my mom was starting to understand this christmas when she said "I keep thinking of ways to celebrate that don't involve food, but I can't think of anything.... why is that so hard?" I just hugged her and thanked her for trying.

I am 35 years old and live on the other side of the state from my parents, to this day my mom shows her love by feeding me and my dad shows his love by changing the oil in my car!  I told her if she  wants to do something for me, she is more than welcome to come over and do my Laundry!! it is becoming an inside joke with us. love is not found in cookies, love is clean underwear

(deactivated member)
on 2/19/16 1:09 pm
VSG on 12/17/15

Love is clean underwear for sure lol. When I lived with my mom as a roommate (when I was 24-27) she did all that for me because, she is an awesome mom. I would come home to clean folded laundry, delicious home cooked food, and a clean house. My cats would be curled with her on the couch while she loved on them and watched TV so I didn't have to worry about them being left alone too long. In a lot of ways I miss having her to live with, but in other ways (nagging me about everything lol) I don't. Parents try so hard a lot of the time to show you love in the ways they were taught to show love and it's hard to break that cycle. Slaving over a hot stove to cook/bake all day was a major show of love for my mom to me and my dad (before they split) and I got a lot of that too. My last boyfriend who lived with me I would cook for every day (whether I worked or not) and bake treats for a lot luckily he was skinny as a rail and never had to watch what he ate so he wolfed everything down, but it didn't help my waistline lol.

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