Encouregement is sometimes needed

I am currently on my journey to getting my sleeve. I need 2 more months of my supervised diet, did my psych eval and have my endoscopy scheduled for the 30th of this month. So far i seem to be on track. In December i was at my highest weight of 270 right now im at 256. its been very slow weight loss but its going. But to be honest ive been having second thoughts about the sleeve. Especially when im having my favorite meals. i know it seems petty but i cant help but feel that im going to miss eating the large plates or the joys of eating at a buffet lol. I already know that after the sleeve i might feel diffrent about it but right now im in the present and i cant help but miss food when it hassent even gone yet. 

I enjoy reading other peoples stories, i cant help but feel inspired by them. So usually when im feeling like maybe i cant do it. i go to all of you who inspire me to be strong. Theres also lots of youtube channels i watch with diffrent people and diffrent experiences. One of my Favorites if Clusie shes funny and makes light in certain aspects. I just hope i stay strong enugh to go through with this. 

I think everyone here can relate to your experience. I dragged my feet in the pre-op phase, had "Last suppers," mourned not being able to stuff my face silly. I know, it's hard.

But let me tell you, it is so, so worth it. You know what you'll discover? You will eat real, delicious food again (it's not all shakes forever). You will be able to enjoy food. If you comfort yourself through large plates of food, you will have to find another way to comfort yourself. (Or just feel bad. Watch Inside Out! Sometimes you just have to feel like crap.) If you're not seeing a therapist, you might want to seek one out. 

You'll find that you'll have quality over quantity, and that's really great. 

The sleeve is an adjustment, for sure, but life will go on and the real prize will be finally getting the weight off. Right now, you're fixating on the downside and not the upside. Visualize all the awesome things you'll be able to do when you get to your goal weight. Write a big juicy list of what you're looking forward to. Put it on your fridge. Read it every day.

Wrapping your head around a new way of eating is difficult for sure. But it's totally possible to enjoy food post-op. I can still eat all the stuff I like, just much less of it! I have no trouble finding things I can have at restaurants, and if I want some of my husband's dessert, I can have one bite and that's plenty.

Well, seems to me you're thinking and reacting as any NORMAL pre op might act. It is frightening to think about your life after altering your your body to such an extreme. You might think that since you've lost 14 pounds, why not just keep going and lose the rest "the Natural Way"?

I'm over three and a half years out. I had doubts and second thoughts, but I kept doing the research and the research led me to the truth: I not only needed a tool to help me lose the weight, but I needed a tool to help me maintain after I lost the weight. (Now, admittedly, I have had regain, but I'm still a hell of a lot thinner now than I was when I started researching WLS). I can tell you with absolute certainty that I would be back at my original starting weight if I had not had the VSG.

VSG has also given me the gift of facing some of my very deeply rooted issues around food. It has been an amazing journey to discover the sly ways that I have used food to cope for years and years.

I'm also gifted with a small stomach that holds a limited quantity of food. THIS IS A VERY GOOD THING!  Sounds like you are a volume eater, as was I. Volume eating becomes practically impossible and if you do overeat, you will pay the price in hours of discomfort. Once or twice and you'll not want to overeat again.

I now substitute QUALITY for QUANTITY. My attitude towards food has changed enough that if I don't like something, I won't eat it. I have precious little room in my stomach for food. What I eat, I'm going to damn well like and enjoy or else it doesn't go down the hatch! Seriously! Just the other day while traveling I ordered something to eat and it was utter crap. I refused to eat it. I also shop for quality ingredients, too. I buy grass fed beef, grass fed butter and milk, pesticide free vegetables and fruit (when I can) and stick to whole foods most of the time.

Eating 3 oz of a good filet mignon, a gorgeous salad or a side of grilled veggies and maybe even a TBS or 2 of sweet potato or whole red rice is FAR MORE SATISFYING than eating crap food at a buffet.

Your fears are normal. You might even begin having "last supper" meals and eating behaviors before your surgery. Again, very normal. Do the research on weight regain and maintenance for WLS patients and regular dieters. You will see what an edge we have on maintaining over time.

Consider yourself encouraged!

I know I'm only 9 days out... and only doing liquids lol but from what I can tell so far and what I was just telling my mother in law about the surgery is that it actually feels so freeing.  To think that I don't have to walk into a restaurant, or any sort of public place where food is present and think "hmm how can I get the most amount of food without people thinking I'm fat."  I so can't wait to order the lunch size and only eat a portion of it or order of the kids meal even.  I used to sometimes order two drinks at the drive thru just so the person at the window wouldn't think it was all me eating two burgers all to myself!  It was so shameful and I always felt like a bottomless pit.  My food portions kept getting bigger and bigger slowly over time without even realizing it.  I think back on what I would have ordered from taco bell 5 years ago vs what I ordered up til my surgery process.  It feels so good now knowing that I won't go back down that road.  It truly feels so good right now to have a few bites of Greek yogurt post op and go "wow I'm  full."  Much better feeling than trying to trick the drive thru lady lol.

I'm almost 11 months post op.  The reason I chose to have the sleeve was because I believed afterward (from talking and eating with friends who had the surgery) that I would still be able to eat what I wanted after surgery.  And, to a point, I do.  But my friends were misleading.  Neither one of them got to their goal and at least one of them has gained back 20 lbs.  I don't want that to be me!!!  So, I totally see your point.  I miss pasta and rice.  But, I also eat things that I want to eat, just in moderation.  Last weekend our family was camping in Yellowstone and I had a s'more and I even made it with a peanut butter cup!  It was delicious.  You will get people on here that would never eat that, but I did and I loved it.  But, I didn't eat 6.  And I've cut calories in other places to make up for it.  My dad had bypass 2 months after I got my sleeve and for the first time the other day he was sad about not being able to eat at a buffet.  They were at a place with an awesome prime rib buffet, but instead of eating 2 lbs of prime rib, he shared one with my mom.  But, when we talked about it later, although he was feeling sad at the time, he said he wouldn't change it for the world.

I'm sorry, that was kind of a rambling response.  I'm so glad I had WLS.  I look good, I play with my kids, I can just on the trampoline, I can walk with them and hike.  When we were camping, we forgot one of our camping chairs and I was actually able to sit in the kids' chairs!!  I bought a size 6 pair of shorts and a small shirt!  Never in my life did I imagine I would ever be able to wear a small.  Trust me, food is awesome, but small quantities of food are too. :)

Well, I have to admit there are times I wish I could eat more.  Just tonight I was enjoying steak - and about four bites and that was it - I was stuffed.  Now that steak was tasting mighty good, and when I realized I had enough, I was a bit disappointed.  That doesn't happen often though.  Sometimes I have to remember it's time to eat because I'm not hungry.  So, I do have regrets sometimes - but those times are few and far between.  Getting the "foamies" stink - something I don't want to experience again.  

I never have regretted having surgery.  Pre-op, I could eat almost a pound of fettuccine al fredo, or a full pound of steak with garlic bread on the side.  Those days are long gone -- besides, I'm too busy living life now to worry about what's on my plate.

I think we all question ourselves prior to surgery and worry about being successful.  I say go for it - you'll be glad you did.

Mary

Thank you all soooo much, All of you are such an inspiration!! Makes me feel ALOT better that my thoughts are pretty normal. I will focus on my future of a healthier me! Again thank you so much for taking a piece of ur time to write such uplifting words.