Post WLS Eating Disorders
MFP really IS a dangerous place! I decided early on that I was going to keep my food diary private and I wouldn't be friending anyone from OH. I'm brutally honest with my logging on MFP (Reese's Peanut Butter cups? It's on there!) and I didn't want anyone else who had WLS to think they could get away with what I was doing in maintenance. "Well, Tracy can eat a cookie or piece of cake and stay in her weight range - that means I can too!" "Tracy skipped the gym two days this week - I can too!"
Reminds me of a quote: "The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else's highlight reel."
Be very, very careful of comparing yourself to anyone, Steph. There is no one else just like you!
If my MFP diary was public, the food police would be knocking down my door. Nutritionists everywhere would be leaving for new lines of work. It wouldn't be pretty.
6'3" tall, male.
Highest weight was 475. RNY on 08/21/12. Current weight: 198.
M1 -24; M2 -21; M3 -19; M4 -21; M5 -13; M6 -21; M7 -10; M8 -16; M9 -10; M10 -8; M11 -6; M12 -5.
Stacy, I get you. I see a therapist every 2 weeks to help me with cognitive behavioral therapy. We are never "cured." Stay and keep in touch. xoxo
Lanie; Age: 43; Surgery Date (VSG): 8/12/14 w/complications resulting in RNY next day;
Height: 5' 6" SW: 249 Comfort Zone: 135-140 CW: 138 (10/13/17)
M1: -25 lbs M2: -12 M3: -13 M4: -7 M5: -11 M6: -10 M7: -7 M8: -7 M9: -3 M10: -8 M11: -4 M12: -4
5K PR - 24:15 (4/23/16) First 10K - 53:30 (10/18/15)
Fear isn't bad. It keeps us from putting our hand on a hot stove, or walking down a dark alley at night. I'm afraid of regain too.
Too much fear isn't good. Locking ourselves in a closet for the rest of our lives isn't a realistic answer. I hope to find my own solutions, and I'm sure you will too, Stacy. Just the fact you work so hard, and remain mindful, is the best sign. Those who stop thinking about it and struggling have the most to fear.
6'3" tall, male.
Highest weight was 475. RNY on 08/21/12. Current weight: 198.
M1 -24; M2 -21; M3 -19; M4 -21; M5 -13; M6 -21; M7 -10; M8 -16; M9 -10; M10 -8; M11 -6; M12 -5.
I always knew, from the outset of this journey, that the surgery and the losing part would be relatively easy - pink cloud, focus on eating a certain way, etc. I also knew that the real challenges would be faced in maintenance. I never, in my years of struggling with weight, even made it to maintenance. When I was 18, I got within a few pounds, but that was it. Maintenance, was unchartered territory for me, and I suspect for many others here, as well. It is terrifying, because of our histories with food issues. I wholeheartedly agree that trying to face these issues, and the underlying causes is hard, but has to be done if we want long term success. We all have to learn new patterns of behavior to deal with the issues that drove us to overeating in the first place. Some days it's all ok, while others, not so much. I think counseling, with the right person, can be a great resource. It is something I'm strongly conidering doing. I also participate in the VSG Maintenance discussion group. That group is small, but I find it quite helpful. Sending hugs and good vibes Stacey! We're all in this together. Mary
I am still fighting a lot of "demons"! Food has been my comfort for so many years....It is hard to let go of. When I was a little girl my mother would say "you be good and I will give you a cookie....you be good and I will give you ice cream...etc" Then no matter what if you put it on your plate you had to eat it and clean your plate....people in China were going hungry. All family gatherings was always centered around food. It is so hard to let go of this emotional comfort. I am still fighting to get to goal and it is a struggle and emotional daily.
on 5/29/15 8:05 am
I am nearly 9 years out from my lapband I am the same way! I have food anxiety, I am super terrified of eating out because it is so hard to eat on plan, I do have tricks etc.. but if I am not 100% prepared for the restaurant I tend to just freak out!
Like you if I dont get my 5/6 miles in I start to get stressed. My husband now hides the scale and allows me once every two weeks that has helped sooooo much! I always feel like people are watching me expecting me to gain it back like so many others have. I have tried 6 not kidding 6 professionals for help all of who basically say the same thing, "well that is good you will not gain the weight back" and I just walk out defeated.
Lately I have been back to monthly support groups, and started taking full body pictures of myself. I thought for sure before plastics it was just the extra skin that messed with my mind but I had over 10lbs of extra removed from my abdomen and still I feel fat, now I think I just look flat and wide, like a thick chick. I wear a size 4/6 for goodness sakes!!
So I keep trying, good luck and yes the struggle doesn't end at goal! Even after 2 kids, regains and maintenance now for over a year I struggle daily.
Mell
Start weight: 320
At surgery: 300
Current: 185
Goal: 175