AM I CRAZY?!

Good Morning Everyone,

 

I am starting my journey at a clinic where I am from and I keep going back on forth on whether or not I want to go ahead and get the surgery. Let me preface all of this by saying that as of right now I do not have any underlying health issues other than being fat - like 324 pounds fat. I don't have diabetes, high blood pressure, or any of the other weight related illnesses that I am just waiting to pop up. Also, I am a single mom of two fantastic teenage boys and it has been just us for 10 years. Their dad is around but doesn't really give a crap and so I am really the only stable thing they have in their lives as grand parents aren't really around either.

Okay so with all of that being said I am having a really hard time deciding whether going ahead with surgery and risking death is completely selfish of me. I am absolutely no confidence whatsoever and feel like I am just a bystander in my own life. I want this surgery so bad so that I can be the person that I feel like I am on the inside but if God forbid something were to happen to me I can't imagine what would happen to my poor boys. I keep beating myself up wondering why I can't just get my crap together and do this on my own but I have tried over and over and only seem to fail and end up making this worse for myself.

I really need some guidance and insight from people who have been through this process. I have lived the past two years dreaming of this but just want to make the right decision for my kids because at the end of the day I live my life for them.

Not crazy -- it is a big decision. 

I had no health issues either (YET!).  Being morbidly obese though is kind of its own health issue.  I don't think it is selfish at all.  You will be able to be there for your kids for longer & the time you spend with them will be better -- you wont be a bystander anymore.  

I only wish I did it sooner.

 

Good luck!

This surgery was the very best thing I have ever done for myself.  Of course, I don't have children of my own to consider.  But my two cents...though being nervous is normal - the health benefits of the surgery (for me) FAR outweighed the possible dangers. 

I started out at a similar point: 311 lbs, no major health issues except early stage arthritis in my knee. But my PCP warned me that if I didn't do SOMETHING about my weight, the knee would get worse, and I was at high risk for diabetes. 

Wishing you much luck!!

 

WLS carries less risks than many other surgeries. At 324 lbs., you are headed towards co-mobidities. Don't wait for serious problems. I had high blood pressure, sleep apnea and congestive heart failure, along with arthritis, tendonitis, neuropathy, etc. ........ ..... Life is much better now!

I went through this!! Single mom of a 6 year old boy ...

I struggled with my decision to actually go through with the surgery. As the date got closer, I got more nervous about it. I was scared of "not waking up" ... but I went through with it because I wanted to be the best I could be for him, and for ME. I wanted to be more active with him and SHOW him how to be healthy too. I had surgery January 21st... so I'm just over a month out. I woke up, and I definitely do NOT regret one thing. Good luck to you!!

Decide for yourself if you have had enough of being fat! Millions of surgeries are performed daily with few if any deaths. For that matter you can get run over by a bus crossing the street. Having surgery for me has been life changing and the best thing I have ever done for myself, I only wish I could have had it done in my 20's, I'm 51 now. Being of normal weight is like having a new life, every fat person deserves to experience this. Do it now, for you, for your kids, for your health, for your life!!

P.S. I too am from Canada

wish I did it 10 years earlier before I got diabetes  screwed up my knees and back 

I got my life back but missed doing lots of stuff with my son and hubby because of my weight

 do it now , while your young , it is safer and you will probably lose faster than if you wait till your older

when I was 40, I weighed about 300 with slightly elevated blood pressure.  I kept putting on about 4-6 lbs per year.  At 50, I had hard to control high blood pressure,  sleep apnea, high cholesterol,  and type 2 diabetes.   10 months after sugary I weigh 216 and everything bit the sleep apnea is gone and it is much better and should be gone within 6 more months. 

I can only speak from my own experience, but I could always commit and lose weight.  The problem was keeping it off.  

When I hit 50, I was over 400 pounds and in constant pain in my knees and feet.  I had high blood pressure, obstructive sleep apnea (which was untreated until I underwent a sleep study) and fatty liver disease.  I also had colon cancer at the age of 45.

I thought about how I wanted to live the rest of my life, and it certainly was not the way I was currently existing.  I had a high school friend who died from sepsis after having WLS 20 years ago, so it was something I always feared.  At the urging of my PCP, I decided to investigate WLS.  

Because of my weight, I originally considered the RNY, but after hearing about the VSG, I knew it was something I was more comfortable with.  According to my surgeon, the mortality rate for gall bladder removal is higher than for VSG.  I think we try to convince ourselves that WLS is so dangerous to avoid taking action, but how dangerous is it to be morbidly obese?  

Only you can decide what's right for you.  I know I made the right decision.  My life is vastly improved, my health is improved and even my disposition has improved.  Living for your kids means being alive for them as long as possible.  Morbid obesity will give you a shortened life span and prevents you from participating in many activities that they enjoy.  Good luck on whatever path you choose.